Societal lack of Empathy

[_Jersey Girl]

So, basically people like to point out a lack of empathy in adults and children, but no one really wants to examine what's going on in our society and try to fix it.

For example, if we're noting a lack of empathy in politicians, other adults, children, the guy on the street, doesn't it make sense to ask "When and how does empathy develop?" and "What could we do to make sure that it does?"

Because I'd venture a guess that 9 out of 10 people don't even know when and how empathy develops.

[_The CCC]

So, basically people like to point out a lack of empathy in adults and children, but no one really wants to examine what's going on in our society and try to fix it.

For example, if we're noting a lack of empathy in politicians, other adults, children, the guy on the street, doesn't it make sense to ask "When and how does empathy develop?" and "What could we do to make sure that it does?"

Because I'd venture a guess that 9 out of 10 people don't even know when and how empathy develops.

Traditionally that role has been served first by family and then by religion, re-enforced by the state.
With the atomization of the family and the decreasing role of religion that leaves the very blunt force of the state to take up the slack.

[_Jersey Girl]

So, basically people like to point out a lack of empathy in adults and children, but no one really wants to examine what's going on in our society and try to fix it.

For example, if we're noting a lack of empathy in politicians, other adults, children, the guy on the street, doesn't it make sense to ask "When and how does empathy develop?" and "What could we do to make sure that it does?"

Because I'd venture a guess that 9 out of 10 people don't even know when and how empathy develops.

Traditionally that role has been served first by family and then by religion, re-enforced by the state.
With the atomization of the family and the decreasing role of religion that leaves the very blunt force of the state to take up the slack.

Are you missing something? You say that the role of empathy development has been served first by the family, but you don't say how or if that role is being served in today's society.

Is it?

If you hold the credentials that you have said you hold, surely you see what problems society faces and where we run off the rails, so what do you have to contribute here in terms of discussing the development of empathy, at what stage of life, and how society is addressing that stage of life?

[_Some Schmo]

So, basically people like to point out a lack of empathy in adults and children, but no one really wants to examine what's going on in our society and try to fix it.

For example, if we're noting a lack of empathy in politicians, other adults, children, the guy on the street, doesn't it make sense to ask "When and how does empathy develop?" and "What could we do to make sure that it does?"

Because I'd venture a guess that 9 out of 10 people don't even know when and how empathy develops.

Do you think of empathy as a learned trait?

I suppose I'd always considered it a innate trait - you're either born with it or not. I'm open to being shown that's not the case, however.

All I have is my own experience to go on, and I've often felt like my empathy bone was too big (as a young boy, I cried at movies all the time. damned marshmallow). In my early teens, I remember getting into two fist fights, and I never landed a punch because deep down, I know I didn't really want to hurt the guy (and got beaten badly one of those times because of it). I made a concerted effort in my early twenties to be less amiable/more assertive, because I thought I might be too much a pushover at my own personal cost.

Of course, I also grew up very poor, so that will affect how you see everyone else. I know what it's like to have to rely on the food bank and welfare. I am still very frugal (perhaps unnecessarily) because I never shook those habits. I also know that very few people take advantage of the social safety net because they think it makes for an easier life. That's ridiculous. Most people want to work, and use welfare out of desperation.

So I suppose when it comes to the poor/under-represented, my empathy bone is in overdrive.

[_ajax18]

How many of us have empathy for those who suffer from affluenza?

The more people suffer, the less empathetic they become. Usually people with a lot of money seclude themselves from seeing how the other 99% lives to avoid the internal conflict it could cause.

[_Jersey Girl]

How many of us have empathy for those who suffer from affluenza?

The more people suffer, the less empathetic they become. Usually people with a lot of money seclude themselves from seeing how the other 99% lives to avoid the internal conflict it could cause.

Do you think about anything besides money? Do you relate to the world in any other way?

Because it doesn't seem like it when I read your posts.

[_Jersey Girl]

Do you think of empathy as a learned trait?

I think it's a complex process that begins with bonding and attachment in infancy, and is nurtured in human beings. Yes, I think it is a learned trait and one that has to do with your interactions with others the day you are born.

I suppose I'd always considered it a innate trait - you're either born with it or not. I'm open to being shown that's not the case, however.

A total lack of empathy is sociopathy. I'm sure there are people who are born socipathic and others who have the potential for empathy basically beat and tortured out of them as children.

All I have is my own experience to go on, and I've often felt like my empathy bone was too big (as a young boy, I cried at movies all the time. f*****g marshmallow). In my early teens, I remember getting into two fist fights, and I never landed a punch because deep down, I know I didn't really want to hurt the guy (and got beaten badly one of those times because of it). I made a concerted effort in my early twenties to be less amiable/more assertive, because I thought I might be too much a pushover at my own personal cost.

You are referring to time periods in your life long after early childhood.

Of course, I also grew up very poor, so that will affect how you see everyone else. I know what it's like to have to rely on the food bank and welfare. I am still very frugal (perhaps unnecessarily) because I never shook those habits. I also know that very few people take advantage of the social safety net because they think it makes for an easier life. That's ridiculous. Most people want to work, and use welfare out of desperation.

Notice the phrase you used, "I know what it's like". That's the key to empathy. It's called perspective taking.

So I suppose when it comes to the poor/under-represented, my empathy bone is in overdrive.

I'm a giant empath myself. Because "I know what it's like".

[_honorentheos]

How many of us have empathy for those who suffer from affluenza?

The more people suffer, the less empathetic they become. Usually people with a lot of money seclude themselves from seeing how the other 99% lives to avoid the internal conflict it could cause.

?

Your comment did bring to mind this article from back in 2012 on how wealth relates to a decrease in empathy, though.

http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-wealth-reduces-compassion/

[_ajax18]

It seemed like when I was a missionary that my Latino companions had little trouble saying no to beggars or ruthlessly (by American standards) haggling a poor street vendor down on his price. I don't mean that these companions were bad people. But that was the culture and they were used to it. I started out just feeling terrible for the people. It took a while of living there in that environment to become a little more calloused to it. Did being poor or living in a poor area make any of us more sympathetic? No, when I came home to the states and saw people claiming poverty I couldn't help but think they have no idea what real poverty is.

Since I don't want to always talk about money, let's consider someone who is chronically ill but there's not really a clear diagnosis so he lives on and just has to scratch out a living one way or another. How would he feel about someone who calls in to work sick because of cold? He goes to work sick every day but since he's sick all the time there's no real excuse or sympathy for it. He probably laughs when people talk about how they thought they would die after having the flu. Does being sick make him more sympathetic? No, because he endured it and he expects everyone else to rise to the challenge in the same way.

[_Jersey Girl]

Since I don't want to always talk about money, .

;-)