Two paths

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doubtingthomas
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Re: Two paths

Post by doubtingthomas »

Hawkeye wrote:
Mon Nov 21, 2022 5:24 pm
I don't think it's going to work out for Doubting Thomas. He needs to learn to be happy as a single man first. You also have to realize and plan for the fact that most marriages will end in divorce which for men is usually a far worse outcome than never getting married.
You are right! I don't have a lot of good friends.

How would you define the word marriage? You could say I was once married not long ago. I had stepson, I loved it him very much at the time.
Last edited by doubtingthomas on Sun Nov 27, 2022 11:39 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"I have the type of (REAL) job where I can choose how to spend my time," says Marcus. :roll:
Father Francis
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Re: Two paths

Post by Father Francis »

doubtingthomas wrote:
Sun Nov 27, 2022 12:38 am

Nobody is going to love me because of my personality alone. People expect me to bring something to the table.
I was going through a divorce and living in my mother's basement when I met the woman (who is ten years younger than me) I am married to now. I knew I was in love with her before we ever went on a date, but didn't bother asking her out because I figured she'd say no. She ended up asking me out.

As Doc said, it isn't transactional. Not if it's actually about love. If you're convinced your personality isn't enough, then I say that's a sign that I was right about the self loathing.
Father Francis
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Re: Two paths

Post by Father Francis »

doubtingthomas wrote:
Sun Nov 27, 2022 12:38 am
Nobody is going to love me because of my personality alone. People expect me to bring something to the table.
I was going through a divorce and living in my mother's basement with my children when I met the woman I am married to now. She's ten years younger than I am and "way out of my league". I don't bring that up to brag, but to make a point. I didn't marry her for her age or looks. I saw those as temporary bonuses. I knew I was in love with her before we ever went on a date, but didn't bother asking her out because I figured she'd say no. I was also happy to let her be free to find happiness whether it meant me being involved or not. Love is selfless. She ended up asking me out because she had fallen in love with me as well.

As Doc said, it isn't transactional. Not if it's actually about love. If you're convinced your personality isn't enough, then I say that's a sign that I was right about the self loathing.
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Dr. Shades
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Re: Two paths

Post by Dr. Shades »

doubtingthomas wrote:
Sun Nov 27, 2022 1:04 am
How would you define the word marriage? You could say I was once married not long ago.
I would define it as having obtained a marriage license from a civil authority and having a ceremony of some sort performed by a judge, a justice of the peace, or an authorized religious clergy member. That's the only way to properly define marriage, so it sounds to me like you weren't married.
"It’s ironic that the Church that people claim to be true, puts so much effort into hiding truths."
--I Have Questions, 01-25-2024
Marcus
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Re: Two paths

Post by Marcus »

doubtingthomas wrote:
Sun Nov 27, 2022 12:44 am
Father Francis wrote:
Sun Nov 20, 2022 4:34 am
I think there's some self loathing in there too. Pontificating on the easiness of single young Latino mothers doesn't show self-confidence to me.
Just some plans for the not too distant future.

It wouldn't be easy to attract single moms in their early 20s when you are in your late twenties or 30s. However, it would be much easier to attract a Mexican mom than it would be to attract an educated career woman in her 30s who is beautiful. Attractive and educated 30 year olds usually have impossible standards.
Women are not things to acquire but you continue to post as though they are. Your sexism is disgusting, as usual.
Chap
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Re: Two paths

Post by Chap »

Marcus wrote:
Sun Nov 27, 2022 3:55 am
Women are not things to acquire but you continue to post as though they are.
True, that.
Maksutov:
That's the problem with this supernatural stuff, it doesn't really solve anything. It's a placeholder for ignorance.
Mayan Elephant:
Not only have I denounced the Big Lie, I have denounced the Big lie big lie.
Hawkeye
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Re: Two paths

Post by Hawkeye »

doubtingthomas wrote:
Sun Nov 27, 2022 1:04 am
Hawkeye wrote:
Mon Nov 21, 2022 5:24 pm
I don't think it's going to work out for Doubting Thomas. He needs to learn to be happy as a single man first. You also have to realize and plan for the fact that most marriages will end in divorce which for men is usually a far worse outcome than never getting married.
You are right! I don't have a lot of good friends.

How would you define the word marriage? You could say I was once married not long ago.
Marriage, like most relationships in this world, is not something in which you'll find perfect joy here on earth. It will force you to learn patience and you'll undoubtedly do more suffering than finding love and joy. We walk the hard road our Lord Jesus walked during his life in our efforts emulate and become more like Him. For those that have faith in His plan, they'll be redeemed and compensated for their suffering and He truly will mend all wounds in the next world. They'll find meaning in it. For those that go into a relationship with any other expectation, only disappointment awaits because we live in a fallen and imperfect world full of imperfect people.

Now if you think the above are just the foolish imaginations of a crazy man, I'd suggest that no relationship at all might be the happier choice for you. You're missing out on far more suffering than you are missing out on joy if our consciousness ends at death and there is no redemption.
The best part about this is waiting four years to see how all the crazy apocalyptic predictions made by the fear mongering idiots in Right Wing media turned out to be painfully wrong...Gasoline would hit $10/gallon. Hyperinflation would ensue.
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canpakes
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Re: Two paths

Post by canpakes »

Hawkeye wrote:
Sun Nov 27, 2022 5:23 pm
Marriage, like most relationships in this world, is not something in which you'll find perfect joy here on earth. It will force you to learn patience and you'll undoubtedly do more suffering than finding love and joy. We walk the hard road our Lord Jesus walked during his life in our efforts emulate and become more like Him. For those that have faith in His plan, they'll be redeemed and compensated for their suffering and He truly will mend all wounds in the next world. They'll find meaning in it. …
ajax, how do you suppose that your afterlife marriage will differ, such that you’ll be ‘redeemed and compensated for (your) suffering’? What does that look like for your partner and yourself, and your interaction?
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Doctor CamNC4Me
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Re: Two paths

Post by Doctor CamNC4Me »

canpakes wrote:
Sun Nov 27, 2022 7:25 pm
Hawkeye wrote:
Sun Nov 27, 2022 5:23 pm
Marriage, like most relationships in this world, is not something in which you'll find perfect joy here on earth. It will force you to learn patience and you'll undoubtedly do more suffering than finding love and joy. We walk the hard road our Lord Jesus walked during his life in our efforts emulate and become more like Him. For those that have faith in His plan, they'll be redeemed and compensated for their suffering and He truly will mend all wounds in the next world. They'll find meaning in it. …
ajax, how do you suppose that your afterlife marriage will differ, such that you’ll be ‘redeemed and compensated for (your) suffering’? What does that look like for your partner and yourself, and your interaction?
I would love to hear his wife’s take on their marriage.

- Doc
Hugh Nibley claimed he bumped into Adolf Hitler, Albert Einstein, Winston Churchill, Gertrude Stein, and the Grand Duke Vladimir Romanoff. Dishonesty is baked into Mormonism.
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ajax18
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Re: Two paths

Post by ajax18 »

canpakes wrote:
Sun Nov 27, 2022 7:25 pm
Hawkeye wrote:
Sun Nov 27, 2022 5:23 pm
Marriage, like most relationships in this world, is not something in which you'll find perfect joy here on earth. It will force you to learn patience and you'll undoubtedly do more suffering than finding love and joy. We walk the hard road our Lord Jesus walked during his life in our efforts emulate and become more like Him. For those that have faith in His plan, they'll be redeemed and compensated for their suffering and He truly will mend all wounds in the next world. They'll find meaning in it. …
ajax, how do you suppose that your afterlife marriage will differ, such that you’ll be ‘redeemed and compensated for (your) suffering’? What does that look like for your partner and yourself, and your interaction?
It looks like imperfect people. What do car wrecks, lawsuits, crappy bossrs, and spoiled kids look like? I'm grateful for my faith. It gives me a why to overcome the how.
And when the Confederates saw Jackson standing fearless like a stonewall, the army of Northern Virginia took courage and drove the federal army off their land.
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