Post-Covid Processing of Attempted Carjacking

The Off-Topic forum for anything non-LDS related, such as sports or politics. Rated PG through PG-13.
honorentheos
God
Posts: 2761
Joined: Mon Nov 23, 2020 2:15 am

Post-Covid Processing of Attempted Carjacking

Post by honorentheos »

An incident happened today that led my wife and I to reflect on how the perception of what should be surreal or shocking has been shifted in the last few years. Going through a global pandemic seems to have front loaded what is in the basket of things that could happen in a day. The basket now contains potentially normalized things I wouldn't have expected. This feeling the matrix is degrading is pervasive enough that it turned out an attempted carjacking is one of them.

Context: I went in to my office today to work on a few things which is not abnormal for me. I have the option to work from home but the truth is the enterprise internet speeds make working at the office substantially more productive for me so I usually go in. I work a lot of weekends for the sake of getting things done when there aren't meetings, phone calls and other interruptions to the flow. There aren't many others who come in Saturdays, and with the upcoming holiday week I spent the time in the office alone.

I had told my daughter I'd drop by her place before I headed home and packed up just after dark. I usually back into parking stalls for safety despite driving a car, and had done so today. I got in the car, started the engine, plugged my phone into the charger and was getting the book I was listening to on Audible queued up when I noticed a guy walking through the parking lot. It's not uncommon as there is an apartment complex across the road so I didn't think much of it. Suddenly he turned and rushed up to the driver's side of my car and told me he needed me to get out of the car so we could talk. I told him we could talk though the window and asked what was up? He then said he needed to take my car and I needed to get out of it.

I don't see most people who walk up to me as posing much of a likely physical threat minus the chance a person is a jujitsu blue belt or armed, so I repeated his comment, but reiterated I wasn't getting out and asked why did he need it? He said it was complicated, and but I needed to understand he could kill me and take it or I could get out, let him take it, then call it in as stolen and collect the insurance. I repeated his comment back to him, restating his plan then was to kill me and take my car if I didn't just give it to him?

During this time, I'm thinking about if I've seen both his hands free or not? His right hand had been at the top of the window as soon as he approached the car as if to check if the window was down enough he could pry it. But his left? It was now behind his back at his belt. Could mean he was armed.

He now escalated the threat, telling me he had a gun, he was going to shoot me and take the car if I didn't give it to him. He was getting more aggressive with his body language and behaviour. But he struck me as most likely on drugs or mentally ill, not violently criminal. I restated his demand was that I give him the car or he would shoot me? but repeated I wasn't getting out for him to take the car. I am not sure what my exact thoughts were here, to be honest. I was running the odds in my head of if I thought he did have a gun or not, what to do if he pulled it, then deciding we were in a stalemate where he wasn't having his bluff called if he didn't have a gun, but if he did have one and I did anything he'd likely shoot me, I looked at him so his eyes were on mine as I started saying something irrelevant as I put the car in drive and pulled out quickly. He shouted, "So you think you're leaving?" as I did so. I kinda made an arc as I speed down the parking lot in the opposite direction, partially expecting there was still possibility he did have a gun and would shoot. No gun fire, I took the first chance to put a building between us, went to the end of that parking lot, pulled off onto the side road and stopped. Then called 911 to report it. Cops were on scene in less than a minute from the time I called. I gave the guys description to the operator they told me there were officers on the way, they asked me to wait for one to come to me and then I waited. They caught the guy almost immediately. I gave my report, they drove me over to where they had him in cuffs to verify I believed it was the same guy, then they dropped me off at my car.

And that was that.

The police officer who first responded to me asked if I was ok, how it made me feel, and what I thought about it all. My adrenaline was up but I wasn't feeling much of anything. It was surreal that it wasn't surreal if that makes sense.

They asked me a question that I don't recall the exact phrasing of but was along the lines of if I wanted him charged. (Not if I wanted to press charges) Since I hesitated at the wording, the officer said basically I decided if I wanted him to go to jail and I had to decide what was the right thing to do. Seemed like a question that could have used some guiding explanations to help me understand what I was agreeing to in either direction but saying yes seemed right.

They had me repeat the description of the person, and an office standing nearby gave a thumbs up to the officer taking my statement. Turned out they had him already at that point and the second officer was there to verify the guy they had in cuffs was still matching the description I gave, perhaps making sure it didn't change from what I had told the 911 operator.

After they had me visually confirm and sent me on my way, I went to my daughter's place as planned. Told her about it, that what seemed most weird to me was it didn't feel like something out of the normal had happened. She and her roommates confirmed that the Phoenix area was just a bunch of criminals in their minds and of course something like that happened. Found out one of them had a gun pulled on them once a little over a year before while they were working at a Panda Express. Confirmed the matrix was def glitching.

I had called my wife while waiting after the officer has taken my ID and was preparing the report. Told her a short version of what happened and I'd be home after checking in with the kiddo. So when I got home she asked if I was doing ok and I told her that was what was kinda feeling not ok about it was I felt like normal, it didn't seem like a big deal.

So I'm processing that. Other than having felt a bit amped up at the moment I made the decision to drive away, it was just a late night at the office.

2022 y'all.

ETA: Updated title. Left the errors in the post for posterity.
Last edited by honorentheos on Sun Nov 20, 2022 4:33 pm, edited 1 time in total.
User avatar
Gadianton
God
Posts: 2566
Joined: Sun Oct 25, 2020 11:56 pm

Re: Post-Covid Processing

Post by Gadianton »

that's pretty crazy, glad you're okay. Did they find a gun on him? When they drove you over to identify him, did he see you? I'm just saying a good chance to gloat over the guy. It's important for him to know that he lost and you won.

I've never looked it up for some reason, but always thought the request to press charges was a little odd. Always thought it just happened in movies. In CA, not sure that goes. If you break the law, why would it be up to the victim to decide to "charge"? Plus, cops aren't technically charging anyone for anything, they are arresting on suspicion of breaking a penal code. The DA has to charge.
User avatar
Some Schmo
God
Posts: 1982
Joined: Wed Oct 28, 2020 3:21 am

Re: Post-Covid Processing

Post by Some Schmo »

Wow man. Scary.

Glad it was mostly uneventful (that his threats turned out empty) and that you're ok.

I have to say... I do not miss living in a big city (and I've lived in several). I can barely remember how I handled it all those years. I've aged into a small city guy, through and through. Last time I was in a big city, I felt an low-grade anxiety with which I am unfamiliar.
Religion is for people whose existential fear is greater than their common sense.
User avatar
Some Schmo
God
Posts: 1982
Joined: Wed Oct 28, 2020 3:21 am

Re: Post-Covid Processing

Post by Some Schmo »

Gadianton wrote:
Sun Nov 20, 2022 5:13 am
Plus, cops aren't technically charging anyone for anything, they are arresting on suspicion of breaking a penal code. The DA has to charge.
I think there's a missing word in the question, "Do you want to press charges?" They should be asking, "Do you want to press for charges?" In other words, do you want to start the process.

I think it makes sense to ask, especially in the case of a domestic dispute, or where the victim knows the perpetrator.
Religion is for people whose existential fear is greater than their common sense.
honorentheos
God
Posts: 2761
Joined: Mon Nov 23, 2020 2:15 am

Re: Post-Covid Processing

Post by honorentheos »

Gadianton wrote:
Sun Nov 20, 2022 5:13 am
that's pretty crazy, glad you're okay. Did they find a gun on him? When they drove you over to identify him, did he see you? I'm just saying a good chance to gloat over the guy. It's important for him to know that he lost and you won.
Thanks, Gadianton. I didn't hear but don't think so. At one point the guy said something about stabbing me or shooting me, so I was also weighing he may have had a knife and was bluffing about the gun to get me out of the car. But I don't know. I do know he has to be treated by EMTs after the arrest before I could ID him.

As for him seeing me, no. They had him by a police SUV when they drove me over to where the arrest was made. The SUV I was in faced him with it's headlights on so it would likely have been impossible for him to see me if he even knew I was in the vehicle. They put him in the vehicle he was next to before they drove me back to my car. I guess he didn't get to confront his accuser.

One item of note. I had the impression he had on a light colored flannel shirt. Turned out it was indeed flannel but with dark squares and light yellow stripes. My mind in the moment registered the stripes as the main feature of his shirt. Kinda weird.
I've never looked it up for some reason, but always thought the request to press charges was a little odd. Always thought it just happened in movies. In CA, not sure that goes. If you break the law, why would it be up to the victim to decide to "charge"? Plus, cops aren't technically charging anyone for anything, they are arresting on suspicion of breaking a penal code. The DA has to charge.
Sounds logical. The question really threw me when asked as it seemed like I wasn't the right person to make the decision being asked to be made. I am planning on looking into the exact wording of it if possible because it wasn't asking if I wanted to press charges. It seemed to convey I decided if he was to be treated as a criminal. My gut reaction was to hesitate because it seemed harsh. The thought I recall having was that he could be mentally ill and answering the question in the affirmative might be the wrong choice if so. It's bugging me, to be honest.
honorentheos
God
Posts: 2761
Joined: Mon Nov 23, 2020 2:15 am

Re: Post-Covid Processing

Post by honorentheos »

Some Schmo wrote:
Sun Nov 20, 2022 5:23 am
Gadianton wrote:
Sun Nov 20, 2022 5:13 am
Plus, cops aren't technically charging anyone for anything, they are arresting on suspicion of breaking a penal code. The DA has to charge.
I think there's a missing word in the question, "Do you want to press charges?" They should be asking, "Do you want to press for charges?" In other words, do you want to start the process.

I think it makes sense to ask, especially in the case of a domestic dispute, or where the victim knows the perpetrator.
Thanks, Schmo. That could be it. I think I was primed by TV to hear, "Do you want to press charges?" so I missed the exact wording.
honorentheos
God
Posts: 2761
Joined: Mon Nov 23, 2020 2:15 am

Re: Post-Covid Processing

Post by honorentheos »

Some Schmo wrote:
Sun Nov 20, 2022 5:18 am
Wow man. Scary.

Glad it was mostly uneventful (that his threats turned out empty) and that you're ok.

I have to say... I do not miss living in a big city (and I've lived in several). I can barely remember how I handled it all those years. I've aged into a small city guy, through and through. Last time I was in a big city, I felt an low-grade anxiety with which I am unfamiliar.
I get this. I do like living in smaller college cities. But to be fair, I am not feeling as if the City turned on me or even did me wrong. It's more a sense of, "Welp, that was something I guess. So, getting ready for tomorrow now..."

I should also say, I talked with the guy back and forth and my subconscious sense was the odds of him having a gun had gotten low enough driving away quickly was the best bet so I acted on it. There was only a few moments where I was seriously thinking the gun being real was quite possible. It never felt like a real threat, though. Like the balance never tipped his way. I was in the car, motor on, a flick of the hand away from pulling out at any time when it happened. If I had been walking when it happened I'm sure it would have felt different. Had he showed something that might have been a gun, for sure it would have tipped. I don't know. It still seems like just a square on the bingo card of life, though.
User avatar
Jersey Girl
God
Posts: 5449
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2020 3:51 am
Location: In my head

Re: Post-Covid Processing

Post by Jersey Girl »

honor I read this earlier perhaps not long after you posted it and as I went through it I could feel a rising tension. honor I'm so relieved that you managed to leave the situation unharmed.

You know, I don't know you in real life but I know you in URL*, as a good friend once called it. Depending on the topic you are friend or adversary. It never matters to me which you are at any given time. I feel some level of connection with most of you here and whew! I'm just glad you're okay!

*unreal life
Slava Ukraini!
Gunnar
God
Posts: 1854
Joined: Thu Oct 29, 2020 6:32 pm
Location: California

Re: Post-Covid Processing

Post by Gunnar »

I'm not sure how I would have reacted if the same thing happened to me. I would certainly have been scared, though. I'm glad there were no drastic consequences to you, and I'm somewhat reassured that the police responded so quickly in this case.
No precept or claim is more suspect or more likely to be false than one that can only be supported by invoking the claim of Divine authority for it--no matter who or what claims such authority.
honorentheos
God
Posts: 2761
Joined: Mon Nov 23, 2020 2:15 am

Re: Post-Covid Processing

Post by honorentheos »

Jersey Girl wrote:
Sun Nov 20, 2022 6:17 am
honor I read this earlier perhaps not long after you posted it and as I went through it I could feel a rising tension. honor I'm so relieved that you managed to leave the situation unharmed.

You know, I don't know you in real life but I know you in URL*, as a good friend once called it. Depending on the topic you are friend or adversary. It never matters to me which you are at any given time. I feel some level of connection with most of you here and whew! I'm just glad you're okay!

*unreal life
Thank you, Jersey Girl. I appreciate that. I generally see people here separate from their positions, too.

I asked the officer who was drove me to verify the person in cuffs was the right guy if they had heard if they confirmed the guy was high or possibly having a mental episode. They hadn't heard. I felt bad for the guy. Not for how he was treated by the police or anything like that. They were professional. Just that it seemed like life had been a bit shittier to him than it had been to me, I guess.
Post Reply