wenglund wrote:mms wrote:It sounds like some of you are willing to help me think through how I should proceed from here, but you probably need a little more information about my actual concerns/conclusions (preliminary or otherwise).
At the moment, it is very difficult for me to believe that I will ever see the "evidence" as weighing in the church's favor on a number of issues. My top five list probably goes something like this:
1) Book of Abraham (missing papyrus theory strikes me as mostly ridiculous (sorry) and catalyst theory makes me assume too much fallibility w/ Joseph Smith for me to conclude he was who I have been taught he was)
2) Polygyny/Polyandry -- No reasons for these practices whatsoever and seems a true "wart of warts" on the history of the church;
3) Book of Mormon anachronisms and other related issues;
4) One true church;
5) Blacks and Priesthood -- always been an issue for me and cannot resolve it.
This is not the thread to debate any of these issues, but I just wanted you to know what sticks out in my mind tongight, could be different tomorrow night, but just in adding issues, not taking away.
Because I am at a place where I think that if I read more, I will only question more, I do not think that "keep researching" is the best answer to the "how to proceed from here" question.
I need to identify (or re-identify) how the "Spirit" witnesses and obtain that witness. If I do not, it looks like the "evidentiary" witness of the "facts" will overcome my tesimony permanently.
So how do I go about identifying or re-identifying the "Spirit"? I suppose the Sunday School answers are relevant here. Pray, read the Standard Works, be more obedient, and listen. Part of me is afraid to do that because I am afraid the answer will be that the church is not true, if I receive an answer at all. As long as I have not drawn concclusions, part of me says, I may still have a testimony. If I go through this process and do not obtain an answer that it is true, I have a problem . . . or do I?
I do wish you well on your test of faith and spiritual journey.
For what it is worth, I have found the following to be of help to me when my faith has been challenged:
1. Put the faith-trial and decisionmaking process into context. In effect, figure out what all the purposes, intents, functions, role, and value the Church is or might be in my life and the life of my family.
2. Within that context, fairly weigh all factors about the Church in the balance. In other words, create a mental list of what I may find right and workable about the Church (faith promoting) as well as what I find troubling and wrong (faith troubling), and weigh them against each other.
3. Within that same context, direct my evaluations internally as well as externally--focusing as much if not more on my own internal rightness and wrongness, as well as the same regarding the Church.
4. Make the decisionmaking processes about choicing the best of multiple viable options, rather than about simply negating a single existing option. In other words, comparatively evaluate the Church in relation to other proven developmental systems (secular and religious) in effort to determine which individually or in combination will enable me and my family to become the very best people possible--in terms of happiness, love, understanding (both physically and spiritually), respect, ability, and being responsible and mature
In other words, I put the trial of my faith in the mix of my whole life's journey, and evaluate it in terms of the destination I have chosen for myself. Metaphorically speaking, if I have some doubts about a specific aspect of a complex navigational devise (such as the Church), I look at the importance and meaning of that specific aspect in relation to the entirely of the complex navigation devise and other navigational options (such as other religious and secular institutions), so as to avoid unwittingly jettisoning a viable navigational devise and finding myself without direction and tossed to and fro by the winds, waves, and currents of public opinion.
Thanks, -Wade Englund-
Wow, Wade! I'm impressed!
This is very sound advice.
:)
If more apologists were actually kind and answered questions in this manner, I think more people who are floundering would feel more at peace.
Great post!