rcrocket wrote:The Christian thing to do would have been to accede to their requests if it would have been nothing more than a major inconvenience to you.
The Christian thing for the other family to have done would have been not to make the request and just use a residence for this.
These kind of conflicts are antithetical to the true Christian religion and manifest a spirit of unbelief. But, I probably would have done what you did.
Congrats.
rcrocket
I must be a great Christian! I would have heard about a baby dying and I would have pouted up my face while tears welled up and given them everything they wanted. Then put myself out of sorts trying to keep myself sane while bending over backwards for someone else -- then being upset with myself 'cause I always do that!
Sometimes it's okay to do what's the right thing for you if the other party is asking too much of you. I'm trying to remember that.
Harmony did the right thing for her and screw the old biddies that have to be inconvenienced!
guy sajer wrote:I don't dispute this, but the wide (and I mean WIDE) variation in how they answer this question makes the question itself rather trite and meaningless as some kind of general standard of behavior.
Correct me if I am wrong, because I can't quite keep track of all your writings, but I thought you held youself out in part as an ethicist.
There is no standard of behavior in your world; it is all relative, hedonistic and for-the-moment screw the other guy unless such screwing will hurt you in the short or long run. Doesn't that sum up evolutionary ethics?
guy sajer wrote:I don't dispute this, but the wide (and I mean WIDE) variation in how they answer this question makes the question itself rather trite and meaningless as some kind of general standard of behavior.
Correct me if I am wrong, because I can't quite keep track of all your writings, but I thought you held youself out in part as an ethicist.
There is no standard of behavior in your world; it is all relative, hedonistic and for-the-moment screw the other guy unless such screwing will hurt you in the short or long run. Doesn't that sum up evolutionary ethics?
I understand your point. There ARE standards of behavior that do develop/evolve over time. Some of them are useful, others less so. I see teh WWJD (What Would Jesus Do) standard as a less useful one. Because I believe in the evolution of social standards doesn't mean that I think they all have equal utility.
To expand a bit, I don't see an ethical standard that justifies behavior as diverse as open, mean-spirited bigotry againts "out" groups and charitable actions toward "out" groups to be terribly useful.
God . . . "who mouths morals to other people and has none himself; who frowns upon crimes, yet commits them all; who created man without invitation, . . . and finally, with altogether divine obtuseness, invites this poor, abused slave to worship him ..."
There is something everyone is overlooking here. A graveside service and funeral dinner can be scheduled any day of the week except Sunday in almost every city. This family could have easily changed the day of their service even if the arrangements were already made with a funeral director and sexton at the cemetery. Death care professionals are quite accustomed to changing arrangements and working with very little notice. The fact is most funerals are not held on a Saturday.
You did nothing wrong. The Relief Society president has a lot of nerve asking you to change plans like that.
guy sajer wrote:I don't dispute this, but the wide (and I mean WIDE) variation in how they answer this question makes the question itself rather trite and meaningless as some kind of general standard of behavior.
Correct me if I am wrong, because I can't quite keep track of all your writings, but I thought you held youself out in part as an ethicist.
There is no standard of behavior in your world; it is all relative, hedonistic and for-the-moment screw the other guy unless such screwing will hurt you in the short or long run. Doesn't that sum up evolutionary ethics?
I'm answering for myself because I consider ethics important to my life and try to follow them.
What is unethical about telling someone else that you can not change your plans? Especially if they have other available options?
No standard of behavior? Ethics do deal with greater good and how to deal with situations in your life! What is this about "screw the other guy"?
And no what you stated does not sum up evolutionary ethics! Evolutionary ethics explains how we've evolved (in psychological terms) to deal with fellow humans.
is the family more politically connected? that's the only factor that matters on who to defer to by Mormons. Are they connected to the stake president, etc? If then sure, they can walk over others, they don't mind pushing the peons out of the way.
And crawling on the planet's face Some insects called the human race Lost in time And lost in space...and meaning
Mercury wrote:is the family more politically connected? that's the only factor that matters on who to defer to by Mormons. Connected to the sake president? sure, walk over others, they don't mind.
Yes, Merc, we know that every person with any kind of power in the LDS church will abuse it often, if not always...
If there's one thing I've learned from this board, it's that consensual sex with multiple partners is okay unless God commands it. - Abman
I find this place to be hostile toward all brands of stupidity. That's why I like it. - Some Schmo
My opinion of the situation is that, because this person was the Relief Society president, she assumed that you should have just bowed to her authority and done what was asked.
What's the old adage?
I think it's: "Pwer corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely".
Something like that.
"What does God need with a starship?" - Captain James T. Kirk
Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch. - Robert Orben
My opinion of the situation is that, because this person was the Relief Society president, she assumed that you should have just bowed to her authority and done what was asked.
What's the old adage?
I think it's: "Pwer corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely".
Something like that.
A Relief Society President with absolute power? Now that would be an entirely different church than the one I grew up in.
As for the original situation, I certainly side with Harmony. The Relief Society Pres should not have even made the request. Admittedly, I'm sure in the Relief Society Pres's mind, she would not think a wedding outside the temple could equal a funeral dinner, but if she'd given the request proper consideration, I would think she would not have even asked.
I may be going to hell in a bucket, babe / But at least I'm enjoying the ride.
-Grateful Dead (lyrics by John Perry Barlow)
rcrocket wrote:The Christian thing to do would have been to accede to their requests if it would have been nothing more than a major inconvenience to you.
This just goes to show you have no idea what a christian is.
In this instance, the christian thing to do would have been to tell the Relief Society pres to f*** off and then ask for forgiveness after the wedding was over.
harmony, you were way more accommodating than I would have been. Gratz and good luck with the wedding.
God belief is for people who don't want to live life on the universe's terms.