Master of your Domain

[Guest]

2007 2007 2007




When men were interviewing me to see if I was "worthy" to be baptized for dead people and were asking me if I masturbate or fornicate I was twelve years old and had know clue what they were talking about. when the stake president asked if I masturbated, I asked what that meant - this was like 1973 - and the stake president said "do you play with yourself" what kind of question is that and what kind of response did he think a twelve year old would give. I was being asked in an accusatory way about sex before I even knew what a real sex urge was.

[_Runtu]

Perhaps the bishop sensed you had a problem?

If you must know, no, I didn't have that particular problem.

CFR on the notion that it is policy to ask such questions as a matter of course. I've never been asked that question in all my life in an interview.

I made no claims that it's policy, but you said it was a "don't ask don't tell" kind of thing. If you're going to make statements like that, it's up to you to provide evidence, not me. I would guess that most of the men here who grew up LDS have been asked about masturbation more than once by their priesthood leaders. I believe you that you haven't been asked that, but I am surprised.

So what's your better advice? You can't go against the doctrine of the self mastery of all your passions, so what would you advise? I never thought the advice given was all that great in the first place. But I've not seen the critic come up with better.

First of all, I don't believe it's something to get all worked about, which is the problem I have with the church's attitude. I was told I couldn't serve a mission if I were a habitual masturbater. I was taught that it was the gateway to homosexuality, and all of that. It's ludicrous to put that kind of emphasis on such a stupid thing.

My advice? If you think it's wrong to masturbate, don't do it. But if you do "slip up," it's not the end of the world. No need to bury yourself in guilt and shame.

[_bcspace]

2007 2007 2007

Lazy research. Lazy research. Lazy research.


I intentionally choose a 2007 to catch you in this.

The “worldly” alternative is that we should pursue our sexual urges wherever they take us, utterly without limits. President Joseph F. Smith taught that God ordained sexual intimacy not only to perpetuate the race, but “for the development of the higher faculties and nobler traits of human nature, which the love-inspired companionship of man and woman alone can insure.” Perhaps this is partly because the desire to be freely and fully loved will motivate us to be both lovable and worth loving.
Bridle All Your Passions” Bruce C. and Marie K. Hafen, Ensign > February 1994

I can go earlier. Are you sure you want me to?

When men were interviewing me to see if I was "worthy" to be baptized for dead people and were asking me if I masturbate or fornicate I was twelve years old and had know clue what they were talking about. when the stake president asked if I masturbated, I asked what that meant - this was like 1973 - and the stake president said "do you play with yourself" what kind of question is that and what kind of response did he think a twelve year old would give. I was being asked in an accusatory way about sex before I even knew what a real sex urge was.

So what is your better advice?

[_Yoda]

Okay, I think we can all agree that masturbation does not in and of itself lead to exhibitionism or homosexuality. However, counsel was given on how one might stop masturbating.

Critics, your challenge is to provide better and more realistic advice than Petersen, Packer, or your favorite LDS bogeyman on how to stop masturbating while still remaining true to LDS doctrine. If you can't, your criticism of the advice is not valid and out of context.

One, two , three.... Go!

I think the advice that should be given is that moderation is the key.

Masturbation is a healthy, natural part of human development. It allows one to understand his/her body and what is pleasurable. Someone who masturbates, and understands his/her body can better communicate sexually to his/her partner, and develop a healthy intimate relationship. If one is to remain a virgin until marriage, this is something that is extremely helpful in securing a happy, healthy marital intimacy.

Example, how does one tell if it's out of control?

If the masturbation is being done to such a frequency that it interferes with the capacity to perform normal daily activities, then it poses a problem, and should be looked at as an addictive situation.

If this is the case, then basically, the person simply needs to occupy him/herself with other activities that will distract him/her from masturbation. For example, the more active the person is with work, sports, music, etc., the less time the person is going to have to devote to masturbation.

Masturbation creates a "high". If you are masturbating too much, then you need to find other ways to create a "high" that are more "socially acceptable". There are ways to do that through discovering talents and achievements through sports, music, writing, theater, service.

I DO NOT, however, feel that a youth, or anyone for that matter, who has a "problem" with masturbation should be punished by the Church.

If someone is interested in serving his/her fellow man by going on a mission, why should this person not be allowed to go simply because they masturbate before going to bed once in a while? Wouldn't immersing one's self in Church service make this person less likely to masturbate. First of all, his/her days are filled with service. He/she isn't going to have a lot of excess time.

That's my two cents....from your rebel LDS friend(foil).

[_Gadianton]

Easy.

Do what Origen did and mutilate it with a hammer or something.

Since old people and anyone and their dog that can't have kids but gays can get married in the temple, thereby qualifying for 1st degree of celestial glory if faithful, then this act won't ruin one's salvation.

And since sexual transgressions will be the #1 cause of damnation, as the early Christians so clearly understood, then why risk it? Since 90 percent plus will "take matters in their own hands", this is statistically sound counsel.

Plus, you have a huge advantage knowing that you'll be married to a physically perfect woman if not multiple women for all eternity and that you can have sex forever. So what's the loss?

If I was as weak as you dumb ass Mormons yet I really believed in all the doctrines, I'd grab a circular saw right now and take care of the problem.

Of course, even a better answer is, if you really do believe your religion, you shouldn't need any counsel like Peterson's supposed talk or all the priesthood session BS. People that really believe things, and have an ounce of self control, can get through it. For instance, I like to sleep, but if I know that by working 17 hour days all week and solve some issue I'm working on that I'll get a bigger bonus, then no one needs to lay down page after page of tips on how to stay awake.

The reason why porn and dolphin abuse is so popular among Mormons, including high ranking ones, is that deep down they know the whole thing is a sham. They don't really believe in the Mormon version of salvation.

[_Runtu]

I like Vaughn Featherstone's "masturbater scroll" talk because it's so gloriously out of proportion. That was right about the time I was in the teacher's quorum. It was about the same time as the "little factory" talk. At least in those days, it was a huge deal if you masturbated, and you could count on being asked about it in your semiannual priesthood interviews.

[_Dwight Frye]

I've never been asked that question in all my life in an interview.

Really? Were you born in the Church or did you convert as an adult or something? Did you serve a mission? I was asked as a deacon up until the time I served my mission, then I was asked on my mission. Been inactive since then, so I don't know if it's routine to ask Melchizedek priesthood holders post-mission....

[_Runtu]

I've never been asked that question in all my life in an interview.

Really? Were you born in the Church or did you convert as an adult or something? Did you serve a mission? I was asked as a deacon up until the time I served my mission, then I was asked on my mission. Been inactive since then, so I don't know if it's routine to ask Melchizedek priesthood holders post-mission....

I got asked after I got married in a temple recommend interview. Our bishop gave a "special" priesthood talk about the evils of masturbation and lingerie.

[_Pokatator]

2007 2007 2007




When men were interviewing me to see if I was "worthy" to be baptized for dead people and were asking me if I masturbate or fornicate I was twelve years old and had know clue what they were talking about. when the stake president asked if I masturbated, I asked what that meant - this was like 1973 - and the stake president said "do you play with yourself" what kind of question is that and what kind of response did he think a twelve year old would give. I was being asked in an accusatory way about sex before I even knew what a real sex urge was.

Ditto, I was younger than you karl and I also was asked before I knew what it was. I went home and asked my older brother what it was. He told me everything. So I guess I can make the claim that my bishop at that time hastened the loss of some of my innocence.

[_karl61]

The “worldly” alternative is that we should pursue our sexual urges wherever they take us, utterly without limits. President Joseph F. Smith taught that God ordained sexual intimacy not only to perpetuate the race, but “for the development of the higher faculties and nobler traits of human nature, which the love-inspired companionship of man and woman alone can insure.”


I bet he believed this with every "fiber" of his being.