Gaz, I'm sorry your family has experienced such trauma.
My brother-in-law is an alcoholic. He has caused me, personally, no end of grief over the last year, finally physically assaulting me several weeks ago in the parking lot of a seedy motel where I'd gone to pick him up for an appointment with a counselor. But that's only a glimpse of what you've been through.
Here's the symbol of my greatest sadness. It just resonates with me:
you've described my brother-in-law to a tee. My sister is also not far behind this discription .... what a waste, of a lot of peoples time/emotions.
There is nothing one can do to help them.
Sorry to hear it.
I cut myself out of her life a long time ago. I can remember the family all being angry with me, not understanding why I felt like I did. As time went by, and she slowly burned her way through each of them with her parasitic nature, they all come around to where I stood.
Its a very sad and troubleing thing to watch a mother, who is full of love and kindness to a fault, turn on her own daughter. There have been some ugly discussions between my parents, who love each other as the day is long, over my fathers continued financial support of her. The hell of it is, if he cuts her off then his grandkids are in the street, and if they come live with him my mother will end up in the hospital from the stress of she and her kids being around.
Its sickening.
We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. - Plato
I cut myself out of her life a long time ago. I can remember the family all being angry with me, not understanding why I felt like I did. As time went by, and she slowly burned her way through each of them with her parasitic nature, they all come around to where I stood.
Its a very sad and troubleing thing to watch a mother, who is full of love and kindness to a fault, turn on her own daughter. There have been some ugly discussions between my parents, who love each other as the day is long, over my fathers continued financial support of her. The hell of it is, if he cuts her off then his grandkids are in the street, and if they come live with him my mother will end up in the hospital from the stress of she and her kids being around.
Its sickening.
So let's hear your sister's side of the story. Can she post here?
My brother-in-law is an alcoholic. He has caused me, personally, no end of grief over the last year, finally physically assaulting me several weeks ago in the parking lot of a seedy motel where I'd gone to pick him up for an appointment with a counselor.
It amazes me that people can hit rock bottom like that, and you still can't help them. they are so consumed with their little worlds that they can't step outside themselves and see what needs fixing, and your in the wrong for interfereing!!! How dare you try to tell them how to run their lives !!
It gives me a headache, because you want to help, but can't.
We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. - Plato
Gazelam wrote:First let me say I'm sorry for the things I said to Kim way back when. I had no business saying those things to you and I'm apologize.
I thought about this thread alot today, looking at why I feel the way I do about my sister and if I should asy such ugly things in regards to her. frankly I got myself very worked up over it and my wife was asking me what was wrong when I got home and if I had had a bad day at work.
My sister has led a life that has driven a literal Shermans march through my very "Leave it to Beaver" family. She is a black hole of Drama and misery, if none exists she creates it. She has nearly caused the divorce of my parents, who love each other dearly and are childhood sweethearts. I think it pointless to list the cars and homes, cosigned on or purchased by my parents, that she has lost or traded for drugs. Those are just things, and money and temporal worldly goods really don't matter in the long run.
Liz asked if I have any good memories of my sister to reflect upon. The answer is no. My earliest memories of her are of my chasing her with a money clip knife (about an inch long, which was taken from me afterwards by my parents) because of some grief she had caused me. It never got better. I have no love for her, my parents have grown to loathe her and only have contact themselves because of the grandkids. Her own children hate her and broke down crying when they were here for the summer and had to go home, not because they would miss my parents, but because they had to go back to hell. To a mother that smokes and drinks and does drugs, who caterwauls, who allows her children to watch slasher movies, who invites strangers into her home to live.
Want to know what would have happened if her life had ended 10 years ago? Her children wouldent have been molested, they wouldent have been exposed to the coutless horrors of everyday life in her house, the screaming and physical brutallity of their parents, they would have missed out on the drug dealers and the guns pointed at them, they would've missed out on their mom being raped and sodomized with a toilet plunger because of the $10,000 their dad stole from the drug lord. the kids wouldent have been locked out of the house to sleep on the driveway becasue mom wanted to smoke crack, they wouldent have watched mom trade the car grandpa bought so she could have more crack. Her kids would have grown up with grandma and grandpa, and been exposed to a Christlike culture of love and support and encouragement. But no, they got hell and pedophilia.
The only way I'm going to Illinois in regards to my sisters upcoming death will be to piss on her grave.
This is my final comment on this thread. I don't need to delve into these thoughts again, it brings a bad spirit into my home. Another special by-product of my sister.
Now I'm leaning heavy toward letting her go to hell and reap the real consequences of her behavior.
I'll get back to you on that.
Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up.
Chinese Proverb
