To the women of the board

[_just me]

Don't feed the troll.

[_why me]

The majority of the cases?? What?? Where are you getting that?

Parents putting their children in day care. I would say that in scandinavia, the percentage is quite high. Which would mean that parents see their awake children for no more than four hours a day.

And in finland where many children are placed in day care with parents only seeing them fours hours a day there is this problem:

http://yle.fi/uutiset/news/2007/06/poll ... fresh=null

[Guest]

50 years ago it was the "rock & roll" screwing the kids up.

20 years ago it was the video games screwing kids up.

There is always something screwing the kids up.

And, yet, society still seems to function pretty well.

See my above link. Many of the kids were placed in day care with parents working. They would see their awake children for only four hours a day. Not much time for talks and discussion. As the children got older, they went to school. But still, the parents worked long hours and came home at 5pm and put their kids in bed by 9pm for school. Now...finland has a problem with these kids and with parents who never learned how to be parents because the day care became the parent.

http://yle.fi/uutiset/news/2007/06/poll ... fresh=null

[_why me]

Don't feed the troll.

Are you stalking me? :=)

[_beastie]

I actually believe that, whenever possible, a parent should be the caregiver during the first three years of life. Sadly, today, that is usually not possible.

Having said that, I resent the brethren for making me feel guilty, like a horrible mother, because I worked outside the home. That's what happens when you PUT THE STAMP OF THE LORD on counsel. People who can't follow the counsel feel that they are displeasing diety, and feel inadequate when they can't find a way to do what THE LORD says to do.

In retrospect, I think the guilt I felt over working did more damage to my children than me actually working.

[_jon]

Here is how the Church presents its official position to Young Women:

Explain that as women, the class members should have two vocations in mind: first, being a homemaker; and second, doing something that will allow them to earn money to support a family if that should become necessary. Many women also find that before they are married or after the children are reared, there is time to be productive in a vocation.

Explain that it is important to choose a vocation and to choose wisely. The vocation we choose can affect our lives in many ways. It may determine where we live, who our friends are, how long we are in school, how much money we will spend on training, how much we will earn, and how much we are able to help our family members. Whatever vocation we choose, we should be prepared to give quality service.

Quotation
Elder Howard W. Hunter said: “There are impelling reasons for our sisters to plan toward employment. … We want them to obtain all the education and vocational training possible before marriage. If they become widowed or divorced and need to work, we want them to have dignified and rewarding employment. If a sister does not marry, she has every right to engage in a profession that allows her to magnify her talents and gifts” (“Prepare for Honorable Employment,” Ensign, Nov. 1975, p. 124).

[_cafe crema]

I might need to give more thought to this before I give a really good response. But here are my initial thoughts.

First, let me say that the biggest issue is that this teaching leads to a woman who is financially crippled and totally financially dependant on someone else. This can be unhealthy for a number of reasons. Reasons I would hope would be obvious.

Second, the way in which this counsel is given is very sexist. Many of the reasons Benson (or whoever it was) gave for staying home indicate that a woman is just too weak to work outside the home. She might get an ego, she might have an affair, etc, etc. Aren't men just as susceptible to these things as women? Yes. So it is sexist.

I would put as second, that it's important for women to participate in public life. Through working outside the home women's voices are heard and they can work in forming the society in which they live.

I believe men and women are in general different with differing approaches, society benefits from have the perspective and approaches that women bring to the table in public participation.

[_why me]

In retrospect, I think the guilt I felt over working did more damage to my children than me actually working.

This guilt is not necessarily religious induced. Many women feel guilty when they are working because they feel that they should be with their children. What you felt would have been a natural feeling regardless of LDS influence.

http://www.workingmomsagainstguilt.com/

http://workingmoms.about.com/od/todaysw ... kguilt.htm

I wouldn't blame the LDS church for your guilt. You probably would have felt it anyway.

[_Jason Bourne]

Well said Just me.

To me it is really about choices without being painted as something less, not following the prophet, etc. And if you do not think even now it is more culturally favorable in the church for a woman to stay home and not put off children then you are really being foolish.

My oldest daughter who has strong feminist leanings but still wants to be active in the LDS church married young, at 20. But she had a lot of personal goals to meet. She has put off children and has none after almost nine years of marriage. She gets comments all the time. A year or so ago she asked me if her only worth to this Church or God was having babies. I think her question was valid.

[_MrStakhanovite]

Anyone else not surprised that Whyme posted in a thread that was oriented towards women?



I know I'm not.