LDSToronto wrote:My friend, let me give you some words of support where others may not agree with your decision.
The church is built on a fictional foundation. Because the foundation is fictional, I see nothing incongruous with presenting a fictional persona to the church to gain the best possible life for yourself and for your family. This includes statements of temple-worthiness.
That should ease your inner self. As for your outer self, well, I'm about to expose you to the greatest secret found within Mormon culture, and it is this: no matter how many callings your reject, no matter how little tithing you pay, no matter how often you wear Joe Boxers instead of the mystical G's, if you attend church with regularity, you will be considered 'OK and active' by the vast majority of members. And no one will bother you. In fact, you can be that edgy guy, the one with the goatee and never wears a suit jacket. As long as you are there most weeks, you will be pass the sniff test.
Best wishes to you in your life and in your marriage. You will find happiness in this choice.
H.
LDSToronto,
Such a kind-hearted post deserves my thorough attention and sincere response. What you saw above was my true story, laced with a feeble attempt at satire. In many ways, the NOM is forced into a corner - to be like Vincent Gigante, performing an elaborate act to avoid prosecution (by the Mormon authorty).
Since you caught me with such sincerety, I am forced to brutal honesty. The situation I find myself in is this: my wife and I have both left the correlated path we grew up with. We have lived our entire marriage never, ever disagreeing on a single bit of holy doctrine. Our testimonies were in sync. Now that we left the Garden of Eden, we are free agents, to think in whatever manner suits us. We are wild horses, set loose to roam the vast fields of Wyoming. We go spiritually where gravity leads us. Much of my childhood is wrapped up in my spiritual tendancies. There is a reason certain images and works of art touch me in ways that differ vastly now from those of my wife. There are reasons she sees Church history differently than I do. There are reasons some of Joseph Smith's mistakes pain me more deeply than they do her. This is just who I am and I can't change it.
So, here I am, left with a different view point than my wife. My feelings for her remain the same as always. I married her for love and see no other way than with her. I've begun to ask myself, "How can I translate my spirituality to complement hers?" It is a challenging question for me.
She will bring up an idea that I wholeheartedly disagree with and I strain myself to stay silent. After some effort, I give in and speak my mind and then we lose the synergy. Things begin to unravel and frustration builds. This discord brings pain and hopelessness.
Since spirituality is a mind structure, I feel that there should be a way to regain the completeness of thought between us. There must be a way that I can keep my ideas and she, hers, without destroying what we share. I think many people around the world do this successfully but it is hard for us because we are so inexperienced in being free religious thinkers.
Anyway, I think I'm rambling.
