OMG, Time Flies! I've been a secret apostate for years now!

[_Rambo]

Just Me, this is a hard step to take and one that takes a lot of courage.

Just remember you are a really good person no matter what other tbm's will say. You know that you are doing the right thing and you are staying true to yourself.

I can't imagine how hard it would be to leave if I lived with my tbm family. I felt it hard enough to leave being single and honestly sometimes I think of going back even though my connection is not nearly as strong to the church. It's just the way I have been use to living all my life. Anyways, good for you for living what you believe and not what others want you to believe.

Thanks for being a good friend!

[_Jersey Girl]

Now you will need to stop attending church, pretending to be something that you aren't.

She doesn't need to stop attending church unless she wants to. Attending a church where one doesn't subscribe to the teachings does NOT make one a pretender. I've attended churches out of my own denomination throughout my lifetime of friends or family members, for general services, funerals, baptisms and weddings.

Everything is not as black and white as you make it out to be and faith or lack thereof is a personal matter. It is not our place to judge the journey of others.

[_Doctor Scratch]

You all know that why me is a troll, right?

[_Jersey Girl]

just me

I've been told that what I have done is selfish and that I am damaged. It's not okay, what I did. Not to my family. Not to my church family. Thinking for myself and doing things that are good for me is the highest offense. The hurtful things they have said were said out of love and concern, of course. That doesn't make it hurt less.

What you have "done" is between you and God. If you lack a belief in God then it is simply between you and yourself, and what you believe to be true.

Life is too short to go around being what you are not. Be who and what you are, BFF.

In all things, be your authentic self. Compromising yourself and important parts of your mind, body and soul, is among the most damaging things I can think of.

[_Jersey Girl]

You all know that why me is a troll, right?

Yes, but it's possible to use his comments as a springboard to address just me's issues. He's useful for that much in this thread.

[_Chap]

Now you will need to stop attending church, pretending to be something that you aren't.

She doesn't need to stop attending church unless she wants to. Attending a church where one doesn't subscribe to the teachings does NOT make one a pretender. I've attended churches out of my own denomination throughout my lifetime of friends or family members, for general services, funerals, baptisms and weddings.

Everything is not as black and white as you make it out to be and faith or lack thereof is a personal matter. It is not our place to judge the journey of others.

The whyme chatbot is simply programmed to respond to certain keywords by emitting standard chunks of post with small-scale random variations in order to give the illusion of creativity. It has no learning features - that is, you cannot modify its behavior by posting a response.

Of course if you feel it is worth while commenting to others on a whyme botpost, why not? But don't build up your hopes so far as the chatbot itself is concerned: you will be sending to a 'noreply' address.

[_Jersey Girl]

Chap,

Kindly read the post that I made just above the one you've made. Why me isn't a point of focus for me on this thread.

[_why me]

Now you will need to stop attending church, pretending to be something that you aren't.

She doesn't need to stop attending church unless she wants to. Attending a church where one doesn't subscribe to the teachings does NOT make one a pretender. I've attended churches out of my own denomination throughout my lifetime of friends or family members, for general services, funerals, baptisms and weddings.

.

I think that you will need to analyze her post. One cannot be free if one is still attending church as an unbeliever in god and expect to be free. Also, it is unclear just when people were giving her a hard time. Was this recent or was it in the past? Also, when she attends church did she lead her husband to believe that she was still a believer or did he know that she wasn't? And if he wasn't giving her a hard time, who was?

Her op leaves open many questions. If she was deceitful in her belief to her husband, this would be a huge betrayal of his trust. One can even compare it to Joseph Smith's hiding polygamy from emma. Now I have said many times that Joseph was between a rock and a hard place when it came to polgyamy and I can understand his not telling emma. And so, I would also understand just me not telling her husband. But she must also see the similiarities between her and joseph if so.

And so, Just me will need to give more details about her OP. And like I said, Jersey on this thread, I have never hid my feelings about church attendance from anyone close to me nor from friends. Nor my inactivity. I have always been honest and upfront.

What is a pretender? A pretender is when one pretends to believe but actually doesn't. It is misleading to all those concerned. And it is certainly not truthful. And hopefully you see my point. Now did Just me do this? I have no idea. But if so, it is best not to pretend if she wishes to free herself from the church.

[_Yoda]

Yes, it's terrible that an unbeliever would go to church to keep the peace at home. What the hell is wrong with you?

That is because he chose inactivity over keeping the peace, and what did it get him? A failed marriage and a judgemental soul.

I never wrote what you quoted by me. Please try to change it.

Sorry about the misquote. I fixed it.

And, it was a pretty harsh swipe at you. I apologize for that.

However, I just don't understand how you, a believer who has tailored how to live the gospel to your own life, can be so judgemental toward others, Just Me, in particular.

[_Shulem]

Life is too short to go around being what you are not. Be who and what you are, BFF.

In all things, be your authentic self. Compromising yourself and important parts of your mind, body and soul, is among the most damaging things I can think of.

Amen and amen.

Paul O