Question about Patriarchal Blessing?

[_stemelbow]

Talk to the MP and ask him to keep it confidential. Most likely he won't say a thing. Don't worry about the Patriarchal Blessing. The Patriarch in the Stake isn't going to listen to some punk mission'ry. That missionary would have to be an idiot to try something liek that in the first place.

[_just me]

Oh, on a related note, I had a missionary call me when I was a senior in high school to tell me he was transferring out of my ward. It felt creepy and strange to me. I certainly felt no connection to him.

Anyway, he moved to the area after his mission and got with a women in her 30s.

Over a year later (and after I was married) he called me again...probably to ask me out, but I told him I was married.

Creepy creepers.

[_MomInColorado]

I'm not worried about the missionary talking to the Patriarch. I am worried about the parents of her ex-boyfriend who have "adopted" her in order to "save her soul" (from her godless mother, no doubt) who are apparently very active in both Wards that share the meetinghouse (the ones who sent THEIR daighter off to college last Sept and had her married off by Thanksgiving!)

Based on my daughter's text history (thank god I still pay for her phone) this crazy woman has been texting her every day for months -- during the day while she is in school and carrying on continuing conversations throughout the day and having text conversations late at night as well. Besides marrying off her daughter to the first man she met in Bible college, her son (the ex-boyfriend) has serious psychological issues, IMHO because of the guilt-ridden, up-tight nature of his up-bringing, and dropped out of high school his senior year (he had English and 3 choir classes and couldn't hang in!) I believe the texting started as a way to keep my daughter attached to her messed up son after they broke up, but then she became her personal mission. When I pointed out how unhealthy it was for her to be put in the middle of their family dysfunction, my daughter backed off the relationship for a while, but then someone she knew at school got baptised and invited her and it all started again.

Uugh! Sometimes it is a curse to be so logical and not be able to look the other way on all the ridiculousness : )

[_stemelbow]

I'm not worried about the missionary talking to the Patriarch. I am worried about the parents of her ex-boyfriend who have "adopted" her in order to "save her soul" (from her godless mother, no doubt) who are apparently very active in both Wards that share the meetinghouse (the ones who sent THEIR daighter off to college last Sept and had her married off by Thanksgiving!)

Based on my daughter's text history (thank god I still pay for her phone) this crazy woman has been texting her every day for months -- during the day while she is in school and carrying on continuing conversations throughout the day and having text conversations late at night as well. Besides marrying off her daughter to the first man she met in Bible college, her son (the ex-boyfriend) has serious psychological issues, IMHO because of the guilt-ridden, up-tight nature of his up-bringing, and dropped out of high school his senior year (he had English and 3 choir classes and couldn't hang in!) I believe the texting started as a way to keep my daughter attached to her messed up son after they broke up, but then she became her personal mission. When I pointed out how unhealthy it was for her to be put in the middle of their family dysfunction, my daughter backed off the relationship for a while, but then someone she knew at school got baptised and invited her and it all started again.

Uugh! Sometimes it is a curse to be so logical and not be able to look the other way on all the ridiculousness : )

Generally speaking, we Mormons are weirdos. No doubt. But, I must say you have found some of the weirdest. Sorry about that predicament. I think she's mixing up unhealthy pushy behavior with "thoughtful, helpful behavior", which is what she probably has in mind. Sorry to say, it happens.

[_MrStakhanovite]

I think the more hands off you go, the better. I’d keep up the advice about psychological manipulation and avoiding train wreck family drama, but if you can keep “Mormonism” to the background, the less chance is becomes a polarized issue.

I’d also talk about love bombing.


Honestly, as a fellow atheist, her becoming a Mormon isn’t that terrible, I’d just make sure she is doing it for the right reasons and not getting played like an XBOX360.

[_MomInColorado]

I think the more hands off you go, the better. I’d keep up the advice about psychological manipulation and avoiding train wreck family drama, but if you can keep “Mormonism” to the background, the less chance is becomes a polarized issue.

I’d also talk about love bombing.

Honestly, as a fellow atheist, her becoming a Mormon isn’t that terrible, I’d just make sure she is doing it for the right reasons and not getting played like an XBOX360.

Thanks for the advice. That has been my approach so far. When she started "hanging out" with the missionaries and then attended two baptism within about 6 weeks, I figured it was heading that way and wasn't really concerned since she is a smart and very independent girl. I just started researching when she invited me to her "lessons" so I would be educated and I planned to just sit back and listen. I figured it wouldn't be so bad if she felt included in a group who focused on "good, clean living" (after all it could be going the opposite way!) But when she started saying things like "I know the Book of Mormon is true" and "I know the Church is true" because she had prayed on it (and it felt all tingly... that couldn't have anything to do with the cute boy flirting with you, could it?!) I about lost it. Then everything after that was jsut plain textbook ...

I told her that my experience with the protestant church was one that was inviting, loving, open and honest ... with a view of God as a loving father and that I wouldn't mind. What bothers me is that she is OK with this view of a judgmental, rule-enforcing god. I just keep repeating "It will all blow over when she goes to college ..."

Thanks for the support everyone.

[_RockSlider]

up front just kidding here ...

get a rumor into the right circles that she had a child out of web lock ... problem solved.

[_bcspace]

get a rumor into the right circles that she had a child out of web lock ... problem solved.

She had an affair with Spiderman?

[_MomInColorado]

get a rumor into the right circles that she had a child out of web lock ... problem solved.

She had an affair with Spiderman?

!! LMAO !! Thanks!

[_bcspace]

Here is my current concern ... please let me know if it is valid or if I am just being paranoid.

I noticed a lesson in her things on Patriarchal Blessings and am concerned that her stalker/supporters will feed information to the "patriarch" so that the blessing will support marraige and children right away and lessen the importance of higher education, independence, and maturity before making these kind of huge decisions. She has worked very hard to get great scholarships and is intelligent but very empathic. I am desperately afraid that she is about to throw it all away and end up like her stalker's daughter who went off to LDS college in Idaho this year and was married to the first man she met before Thanksgiving (talk about classic cliché'!! My daughter thinks "they are so cute together")

1. The missionary who likes her has a daughter? That much of an age difference?
2. The missionary is in serious violation of mission rules by carrying on a romance with an investigator/local member/local anyone. Harmony is not a believing Mormon and I am an active believing Mormon. You heard it from both of us.
3. If they do end up marrying, and assuming I'm reading #1 incorrectly, you're being somewhat paranoid which a mom should be. Lots of couples marry and have children and both are able to complete college. There are indeed many who don't however. Depends on what type of persona they have.
4. Becoming LDS is one of the best things that can happen to a person and atheists might not have the most difficult time realizing that, not being enamored of false religion like others might be. Sometimes mission romances work out well even though they are not allowed, but sometimes the missionary in question is a cad. I had several of those myself as missionary companions and I got them sent home asap.

My main concern is people joining the Church for the wrong reasons. It's entirely possible that your daughter can be smitten by the handsome male attention and still get a proper testimony but it should generally go slower imho. Is she willing to pay tithing? Keep the Word of Wisdom? Keep the law of Chastity (no sexual relations outside marriage)? Attend Church on a regular basis? Does she have friends at Church to support her there? If not, she's not ready for baptism no matter how much others think so. It's a way of life rather than just a change in beliefs.

who went off to LDS college in Idaho this year and was married to the first man she met before Thanksgiving (talk about classic cliché'!! My daughter thinks "they are so cute together")

As long as they're happy (still going to college?), this is paranoia.