Fast and Testimony Meetings: Are They On The Chopping Block?

[_Shulem]

Sometimes I love Nehor...his humor and wit is so needed...but I can see why he laments his singleness..he is so ate up and devoured by expectations of a good wife that he shuns the best...or doesn't give them a chance...because of this religion. God does not hate him...he is not a victim..he is his own worse enemy in a world that is rife with love ....outside this religion. You lose Nehor...I love you...I love everyone...but you lose the best in so many worlds when you make this religion your world. I am no longer sad for you..but for the you that is capable to love and be loved..I am sad for you.

Nehor needs to take care of himself and his family. Are the debts piling up, perhaps? Bills and worries?

Do yourself a favor, Nehor. Stop paying tithing today. Give yourself a personal 5% pay raise and deposit the other 5% into your retirement accounts, assuming you're already doing that. That 5% over the years will grow into a mountain of security and wellbeing for you later on. When you look back you'll be glad you dumped the church and have the funds you needs to secure your future in retirement.

If you choose to waste your hard earned money on the church then that is your choice. You can only blame yourself. You're throwing money away and jeopardizing your future with unnecessary hardship.

[_Gadianton]

As a guy who suffers through these meetings monthly, I'd love to see them go. Most testimonies are innocuous and boring, but we've got this one lady who is a microphone hog and cries about really minor ____ ad nauseum. Even my TBM wife rolls her eyes when she is heading up.

However, if they replace it with assigned testimonies, that might actually manage to make the experience worse. At least the people who are up there now actually want to be there.

yeah, there were always the travel logs and inappropriate stuff that could be outright hilarious even if uncomfortable to listen to. One of the good things about F&T is that it gave the poor and downtrodden a forum to be heard by everyone. okay, every sunday for a year we heard a woman struggle through the same testimony who was dying, but that helped her in some way get through it so maybe that was okay. sure, a lot of this miss the definition of testimony, but it became something more meaningful than that, as we all should agree that testimonies per se are dumb.

[_fetchface]

yeah, there were always the travel logs and inappropriate stuff that could be outright hilarious even if uncomfortable to listen to. One of the good things about F&T is that it gave the poor and downtrodden a forum to be heard by everyone. okay, every sunday for a year we heard a woman struggle through the same testimony who was dying, but that helped her in some way get through it so maybe that was okay. sure, a lot of this miss the definition of testimony, but it became something more meaningful than that, as we all should agree that testimonies per se are dumb.

Great point, it is very emotionally uplifting to a lot of people to be able to share those things in that forum.

I guess I might be overly jaded when it comes to the whole process but I think it comes from knowing that if I got up and shared my most honest thoughts the same way, it would be viewed by the audience as offensive in the extreme. I can never get out of it what these others do because my honest thoughts and feelings are forbidden.

But I really do get tired of "guilt everybody into going to the temple" guy and another guy who chokes up every other sentence on things that just don't warrant that kind of emotion. I'm just not sure that assigning random members to do it would make things better. It might not make it worse, though. Might just be the same chairs in a different arrangement.

[_Mormonicious]

Back to the OP, yes, F&T meetings are on the chopping block. There have been a few pilot programs I’m aware of in Colorado that bishops are “assigning” testimonies to individuals they know toe the company line to prevent open mic hijacking. And since we all know revelation starts with pilot programs, it’s safe to say the open mic testimony meetings are effectively dead in the near future.

GREAT, no More Open-Mic night at the Comedy club Fast and Testimony meeting. Now just good ol' Gospel speaking in Tongues. Abadaba, gitchgoogoo, wankythesnakie, hobblenthegobblen, ew, ew, walla, walla bing bang. . . . . . in the name of Mormon bastard jebus, Amen

All HAIL Google GOD

[_Gadianton]

But I really do get tired of "guilt everybody into going to the temple" guy and another guy

That I can agree with. If it involves an actual "testimony" in conjunction with aspirations for leadership then let the trap doors open.

[_lostindc]

yeah, there were always the travel logs and inappropriate stuff that could be outright hilarious even if uncomfortable to listen to. One of the good things about F&T is that it gave the poor and downtrodden a forum to be heard by everyone. okay, every sunday for a year we heard a woman struggle through the same testimony who was dying, but that helped her in some way get through it so maybe that was okay. sure, a lot of this miss the definition of testimony, but it became something more meaningful than that, as we all should agree that testimonies per se are dumb.

The weak minded, the poor, the downtrodden aren't wanted in the Church outside of a project and number. Fact is, the talks that are valued by the members are talks about overcoming. Likewise, members prefer to hear from winners. In my childhood ward I remember us youth mocking those that struggled delivering testimonies. Even on occasion we mocked the poor, those with troubled backgrounds, vulnerablies, mental health issues etc. We saw them as weak. The negative experiences these individuals encountered was on them. Leaders also mocked these members, smirking when recalling the vulnerable testimony by a member. The death of the F&T meeting will be a welcomed change for many leaders and members. The mic is now taken away from the vulnerable. Winners will be provided ample opportunities to speak in F&T meetings and activists won't easily get the mic.

[_Shulem]

GREAT, no More Open-Mic night at the Comedy club Fast and Testimony meeting. Now just good ol' Gospel speaking in Tongues. Abadaba, gitchgoogoo, wankythesnakie, hobblenthegobblen, ew, ew, walla, walla bing bang. . . . . . in the name of Mormon bastard jebus, Amen

All HAIL Google GOD

You forgot to say STUPID damned Mormons!



"wankythesnakie"

[_Shulem]

The death of the F&T meeting will be a welcomed change for many leaders and members. The mic is now taken away from the vulnerable. Winners will be provided ample opportunities to speak in F&T meetings and activists won't easily get the mic.

Out with the downtrodden and less fortunate. Nobody wants to hear their sad stories. They are unsuccessful in life and shouldn't be allowed to pull down everyone else with them. No longer will the whole ward have to suffer and listen to the fat (wart on her nose) crying lady slobber about her silly life's experiences.

Stupid Mormon Jesus. Would someone please crucify him?

here are some nails

[_Mormonicious]

GREAT, no More Open-Mic night at the Comedy club Fast and Testimony meeting. Now just good ol' Gospel speaking in Tongues. Abadaba, gitchgoogoo, wankythesnakie, hobblenthegobblen, ew, ew, walla, walla bing bang. . . . . . in the name of Mormon bastard jebus, Amen

All HAIL Google GOD

You forgot to say STUPID ____ Mormons!



"wankythesnakie"

STUPID damned Mormons

[_Shulem]

I'd like to bear my testimony that I know that I'm morally clean. The bishop told me that if I could go a whole week without touching myself inappropriately then I would be worthy to bless the sacrament.