drumdude wrote: ↑Sat Aug 23, 2025 10:17 pm
I can imagine DCP’s gleeful rush to criticize me as an unhinged atheist who must be attacking a poor undeserving man of faith who only wanted to make families stronger.
As with many things, DCP has no issues speaking on topics of which he is completely ignorant with a smug air of authority and condescension.
I hope this helps DCP reflect on the damage that the culture wars his generation of Christian believers has inflicted on society hath wrought. He perhaps should read some of the accounts of people my age who have had to grow up under the loving care of Christian boomer parents.
Some of the myriad accounts are available here:
https://www.reddit.com/r/Christianity/c ... r_and_key/
The Proprietor need not go far to read such an account. A commenter on his own blog post shared this witness:
Dobson for good or ill certainly had an impact on our society. Personally, I don't believe children should be "broken" in order to make them more compliant. As President Hinckley said: "violent parents raise violent children" or words to that effect. Dobson did what he thought was right and advocated strongly for it. Is he in hell? I don't know. I know my uncle was a student of his and those who followed after him. His kids suffered terribly. Some won't have anything to do with him.
I think Dobson went too far in many ways. Would the world have been a better place without him? Even though I don't agree with him on many things, I don't think so.
In
The Strong-Willed Child, Dr. Dobson provided guidance to parents on administering corporal punishment to children. He wrote:
When spankings occur, they should be administered with a neutral object; that is, with a small switch or belt, but rarely with the hand. I have always felt that the hand should be seen by the child as an object of love rather than an instrument of punishment. Furthermore, if a parent commonly slaps a youngster when he is not expecting to be hit, then he will probably duck and flinch whenever Father suddenly scratches his ear. And, of course, a slap in the face can reposition the nose or do permanent damage to the ears or jaw. If all spankings are administered with a neutral object, applied where intended, then the child need never fear that he will suddenly be chastised for some accidental indiscretion. (There are exceptions to this rule, such as when a child's hands are slapped or thumped for reaching for a stove or other dangerous object.)
Incidentally, I mentioned in Dare to Discipline that my mother once spanked me with a girdle for being sassy and rude. One man read that story and became so angry that he refused to come and hear me speak the next time I was in his city. I found out later why he was so incensed. He had misread my explanation and thought my mother had hit me with a griddle! There is a difference between the two, although girdles in 1940 weighed about sixteen pounds and were riveted with steel bolts down both sides. It was also equipped with dozens of straps and buckles that dangled ominously from the bottom. In some ways, a griddle would have been easier to duck than this abominable undergarment which was flung in my direction.
Should a spanking hurt? Yes, or else it will have no influence. A swat on the behind through three layers of wet diapers simply conveys no urgent message. However, a small amount of pain for a young child goes a long way; it is certainly not necessary to lash or "whip" him. Two or three three stinging strokes on the legs or bottom with a switch are usually sufficient to emphasize the point, "You must obey me." And finally, it is important to spank immediately after the offense, or not at all. A toddler's memory is not sufficiently developed to permit even a ten-minute delay in the administration of justice. Then after the episode is over and the tears have subsided, the child might want to be held and reassured by his mother or father. By all means, let him come. Embrace him in the security of your loving arms. Rock him softly. Tell him how much you love him and why he must "mind his mommie." This moment can be the most important event in the entire day. (52-54)
As noted by many others, in the opening pages of the same book, Dr. Dobson related a disturbing story in which he beat the family pet, a 12-pound dachshund named Siggie, with a belt for failing to comply with an order to get off a fuzzy toilet seat cover and go to his bed. Dobson wrote:
[The dog] stood his ground so I gave him a firm swat across the rear end, and he tried to bite the belt. I hit him again and he tried to bite me. What developed next is impossible to describe. That tiny dog and I had the most vicious fight ever staged between man and beast. I fought him up one wall and down the other, with both of us scratching and clawing and growling and swinging the belt. I am embarrassed by the memory of the entire scene. Inch by inch I moved him toward the family room and his bed. As a final desperate maneuver, Siggie jumped up on the couch and backed into the corner for one last snarling stand. I eventually got him to bed, but only because I outweighed him 200 to 12!
The following night I expected another siege of combat at Siggie's bedtime. To my surprise, however, he accepted my command without debate or complaint, and simply trotted toward the family room in perfect submission. In fact, that fight occurred more than four years ago, and from that time to this, Siggie has never made another "go for broke" stand. It is clear to me now that Siggie was saying in his canine way, "I don't think you're tough enough to make me obey." Perhaps I seem to be humanizing the behavior of a dog, but I think not. Veterinarians will confirm that some breeds of dogs, notably dachshunds and shepherds, will not accept the leadership of their masters until human authority has stood the test of fire and proved itself worthy.(5-6)
Dobson then drew a comparison between disciplining dogs and disciplining children:
But this is not a book about the discipline of dogs; there is an important moral to my story which is highly relevant to the world of children. Just as surely as a dog will occasionally challenge the authority of his leaders, a little child is inclined to do the same thing, only more so. This is no minor observation, for it represents a characteristic of human nature which is rarely recognized (or admitted) by the "experts" who write books on the subject of discipline. I have yet to find a text for parents or teachers which acknowledges the struggle— the exhausting confrontation of wills — which most parents and teachers experience regularly with their children. Adult Leadership is rarely accepted unchallenged by the next generation; it must be "tested" and found worthy of allegiance by the youngsters who are asked to yield and submit to its direction. (6-7) (emphasis in the original)
Dr. Dobson’s counsel is more than simply “genuinely strange,” as the Proprietor says. (As an aside, I find it “genuinely strange” that the Proprietor can write that a
USA Today story on Dobson’s passing and legacy “strikes me as balanced and fairly accurate,” given that it’s clear that the Proprietor knows very little about the man.)
