A thread just for Mercury, but all others are welcome.

[_Moniker]

Charity, it doesn't look as though Mercury gave you permission to post that PM.

That would be correct.

And it was out of context, as well. Hmm... What can I say? Pretty much nothing. sigh

[Guest]

Charity, it doesn't look as though Mercury gave you permission to post that PM.

I didn't appreciate his going off board to continue to insult me. I was specifically not replying back to his insulting posts on the board, and he was getting mad not knowing if I was even reading his insults. So he got in my face with a pm. Well tough luck. I generally believe that the only person damaged is the one doing the insulting. Although most people who throw insults around are being bullies and thinking they are causing harm. So, I think bullies should be "outed."

I think "bullies" out themselves. I can spot them a mile away, usually. :)

When someone speaks to you in a private manner the assumption is that this is between the two of you. This is why it is taken off of the board, Charity. There were no threats to your life, or anything of seriousness other than the idea that he doesn't like you. Big surprise! What was so horrible in that PM? Mercury thinks you act poorly and you think he does. Looks like a stale mate.

Go to your corners.

[_Mercury]

Charity, it doesn't look as though Mercury gave you permission to post that PM.

That would be correct.

And it was out of context, as well. Hmm... What can I say? Pretty much nothing. sigh

As always, charity concieves her subject matter before reading a post and wraps the message around what she wants to impart, irregardless if the context does not allign or not.

I believe that's called being a snake.

[_skippy the dead]

Charity, it doesn't look as though Mercury gave you permission to post that PM.

Pardon my naïvété, but why would someone need permission to post an unsolicited PM, email or other correspondence? Admittedly, there may be cases where the parties agree either explicitly or by the nature of their relationship or prior dealings that correspondence in whatever form is to remain between the parties, but if somebody sends an unsolicited PM (particularly when continuing a line of insults started on a public message board), why is the recipient obligated to keep it secret?

I'm asking in all sincerity on this one - perhaps I'm not well-versed in Netiquette.

[_charity]

When someone speaks to you in a private manner the assumption is that this is between the two of you. This is why it is taken off of the board, Charity. There were no threats to your life, or anything of seriousness other than the idea that he doesn't like you. Big surprise! What was so horrible in that PM? Mercury thinks you act poorly and you think he does. Looks like a stale mate.

Go to your corners.

I am happy in mine. If he steps into my corner, I can "punch" him. In board terms, that means post what he says to me in my corner.

Okay Merc, you think it was out of context. Want me to post all your pm's to me so everyone can see the entire context? I would be happy to do so.

Oh, yes, since you said you want me to comment on your ideas, I have given you many chances here, and all you have done it insult me. As usual. So I guess you really don't want to have a discussion with me after all?

[_Moniker]

Charity, it doesn't look as though Mercury gave you permission to post that PM.

Pardon my naïveté, but why would someone need permission to post an unsolicited PM, email or other correspondence? Admittedly, there may be cases where the parties agree either explicitly or by the nature of their relationship or prior dealings that correspondence in whatever form is to remain between the parties, but if somebody sends an unsolicited PM (particularly when continuing a line of insults started on a public message board), why is the recipient obligated to keep it secret?

I'm asking in all sincerity on this one - perhaps I'm not well-versed in Netiquette.

Uh, Charity said he dared her to post to her, how did you read that? I just reviewed the thread and maybe she was insinuating that since he wanted her to post to him that she did so with the PM, yet, did not get permission?

I am not well versed in Netiquette. I am well versed in human relations, though, and understand that if there are not threats that private correspondence should remain private. I see it as respect. If it is unsolicited I delete them (wouldn't believe the amount I've had to delete), and have no desire to out anyone on the board. Again, speak the truth to humiliate, embarrass someone? It's the ex-LDS and LDS way? Why?

And I see nothing that is awful in that PM of Mercury's. No more than what Charity has said. Skippy, I know you don't like Charity getting the crap beaten out of her on the boards lately. I agree that some of the things said to her are heinous -- I used to defend her repeatedly. Why don't you go after those that choose to attack her instead of me? 'Cause I was the ONLY one on this board that defended her for months. So, you go take care of it. I'm finished.

[_Jersey Girl]

When someone speaks to you in a private manner the assumption is that this is between the two of you. This is why it is taken off of the board, Charity. There were no threats to your life, or anything of seriousness other than the idea that he doesn't like you. Big surprise! What was so horrible in that PM? Mercury thinks you act poorly and you think he does. Looks like a stale mate.

Go to your corners.

I am happy in mine. If he steps into my corner, I can "punch" him. In board terms, that means post what he says to me in my corner.

Okay Merc, you think it was out of context. Want me to post all your pm's to me so everyone can see the entire context? I would be happy to do so.

Oh, yes, since you said you want me to comment on your ideas, I have given you many chances here, and all you have done it insult me. As usual. So I guess you really don't want to have a discussion with me after all?

Private messages are intended to be off board communication. If you don't wish to accept them, you don't have to. Posting them on the board gives the impression that you disregard confidentiality as a rule of any sort of private communication.

[_skippy the dead]

I am not well versed in Netiquette. I am well versed in human relations, though, and understand that if there are not threats, taunts, and what not that private correspondence should remain private. I see it as respect. If it is unsolicited I delete them (wouldn't believe the amount I've had to delete), and have no desire to out anyone on the board. Again, speak the truth to humiliate, embarrass someone? It's the ex-LDS and LDS way? Why?

And I see nothing that is awful in that PM of Mercury's. No more than what Charity has said. Skippy, I know you don't like Charity getting the crap beaten out of her on the boards lately. I agree that some of the things said to her are heinous -- I used to defend her repeatedly. Why don't you go after those that choose to attack her instead of me? 'Cause I was the ONLY one on this board that defended her for months. So, you go take care of it. I'm finished.

I think you've misread me. I wasn't going after you at all - I was asking an honest question. Like I said, I'm not familiar with this area of Netiquette, and so was inquiring as to the reasoning behind the issue. I wasn't trying to start anything, really. My apologies for the misunderstanding.

[_Moniker]

I am not well versed in Netiquette. I am well versed in human relations, though, and understand that if there are not threats, taunts, and what not that private correspondence should remain private. I see it as respect. If it is unsolicited I delete them (wouldn't believe the amount I've had to delete), and have no desire to out anyone on the board. Again, speak the truth to humiliate, embarrass someone? It's the ex-LDS and LDS way? Why?

And I see nothing that is awful in that PM of Mercury's. No more than what Charity has said. Skippy, I know you don't like Charity getting the crap beaten out of her on the boards lately. I agree that some of the things said to her are heinous -- I used to defend her repeatedly. Why don't you go after those that choose to attack her instead of me? 'Cause I was the ONLY one on this board that defended her for months. So, you go take care of it. I'm finished.

I think you've misread me. I wasn't going after you at all - I was asking an honest question. Like I said, I'm not familiar with this area of Netiquette, and so was inquiring as to the reasoning behind the issue. I wasn't trying to start anything, really. My apologies for the misunderstanding.

I'm just jumpy, lately. I just recall you getting upset when Charity and I had a conversation about rape. Got pretty heated. I think I try to hold my tongue, a lot! I'm doing better lately. I have no desire to attack Charity in anyway. I avoid many posters that push my buttons now.

Not sure about Netiquette, yet: I've been told by a mod that I should keep PMs private. I was reeling a few months ago by some messages I received and I was told that to post them on the board was not the right move. I also had some other type of correspondence that outed someone attacking me on this board and I chose not to post it. I'm glad I calmed down and let it pass 'cause if I had posted them I too would have lost respect for myself. I think these messages are usually posted when people get heated.

I don't like PMs posted on the board for a few reasons. Context may be altered (it was in this instance), there may be background that the readers are not aware of, and it merely creates fluffy threads where there is nothing other than two people (and other posters like you and I) that carry on this childish nonsense. It's all very childish.

[_skippy the dead]

I'm just jumpy, lately. I just recall you getting upset when Charity and I had a conversation about rape. Got pretty heated. I think I try to hold my tongue, a lot! I'm doing better lately. I have no desire to attack Charity in anyway. I avoid many posters that push my buttons now.

Not sure about Netiquette, yet: I've been told by a mod that I should keep PMs private. I was reeling a few months ago by some messages I received and I was told that to post them on the board was not the right move. I also had some other type of correspondence that outed someone attacking me on this board and I chose not to post it. I'm glad I calmed down and let it pass 'cause if I had posted them I too would have lost respect for myself. I think these messages are usually posted when people get heated.

I don't like PMs posted on the board for a few reasons. Context may be altered (it was in this instance), there may be background that the readers are not aware of, and it merely creates fluffy threads where there is nothing other than two people (and other posters like you and I) that carry on this childish nonsense. It's all very childish.

Good enough.

I suppose there is some wisdom in not sending anything to strangers that you wouldn't want the world to see - if we don't know the recipient well enough to trust that confidence will be maintained, we cannot guarantee that the messages won't see the light of day. This could apply to not just PMs on an anonymous internet forum, but in general as well. It's the way it goes, I guess.

by the way - I am trying to refrain from any substantive comment on this particular issue (Mercury's PMs to Charity), because I can see both sides of the problem, and can't quite figure out which side is "right" because of all the variables, both known and unknown. So I'll just go back to observing, if I can.