Why the Book of Mormon is very similar to a cup of coffee

[Guest]

Someone once asked me, "Why do you talk about coffee so much?" The answer is because it is a new object in my life that is delicious and I am suddenly free to obsess about and explore. It also happens to be very similar to the Book of Mormon! "How is that?" you ask. Well, let me tell you.

I have memories of testimony meetings where other kids my age would express their feelings about reading the Book of Mormon each morning before they go to school or work. I remember many of them suggesting that without reading this book, they would not be able to function at their prime spiritually, which is obviously connected with their mind and body. Many Mormon kids cannot function at their prime without first reading the Book of Mormon? Hmmm. This sounds just like coffee!

I also remember hearing people tell me that we should avoid coffee because it is habit forming and we develop a dependency.

I wonder if people ever make the connection between coffee and the Book of Mormon. I know I never did, but I should have! I should have realized that just like my dirty Catholic neighbors, I was addicted to a cup of joe (Joseph Smith) every morning. I developed a dependency that I'm still trying to get over. Actual coffee has helped, I think.

Cheers,

Zee.

[_Drifting]

Lavazza......mmmmmmmmm......

[_Blixa]

"Cup of Joe" is too good not to steal. Thanks, zeez!

[_huckelberry]

Zee, your weird comparisons and thought experiments about religion are a happy addition to this board. I can find delight even though sometimes they me utterly responseless.

I am lost on this reading the Book of Mormon every morning or frequently. I cannot think of any Mormon I knew growing up who did such a thing or dreamt of such a thing. I cannot imagine anyone claiming to do such a thing. I thought everybody knew it was chloroform in print but would never admit it. Maybe I read my own sense into other peoples indifference. This might be a miraculous success for the Benson campaign. (I have heard the book became a major interest for him though I do not know why).

[_Darth J]

Coffee: Wakes you up

Book of Mormon: Puts you to sleep

[_DrW]

"Cup of Joe" is too good not to steal. Thanks, zeez!

zeez,

Can we make that, "cuppa Joe?"

Or perhaps "Cup o' Joe?"

(Anyway, plus one. Well done.)

[_sock puppet]

Let's see....

• I've defended the validity of each at different times in my life
  
• I've advocated that each is not necessary at different times in my life

[_Darth J]

I really like this OP.

I have found, however, that I can only stand coffee if it has something to flavor it so it doesn't taste like coffee. This might also mean that I need to find a different blend.

Maybe if there was a way to add some flavor to the Book of Mormon, it might also become palatable.

[_zeezrom]

I'm convinced that coffee is great for reasons partially beyond reasoning.

[Guest]

I'm convinced that coffee is great for reasons partially beyond reasoning.

Coffee is probably the most widely available simple pleasure most humans can experience on a daily basis. And what is life besides the simple pleasures of day to day life?

Now, if I could have sex daily, THAT would be my number 1. However, as it stands, coffee is number 1 and sex is number 2 due to its infrequency relative to coffee sipping.

Actually, sex is my number 2 all the way to number 36 or so, then it is the usual; sunsets, walking hand in hand down the beach, sipping wine with a good book, the blah blah blabady blah kind of simple pleasures. Know what I mean?

Coffee. It sort of consumes my thinking. I don't feel the day has gone right unless the ritual of coffee drinking was accomplished in a manner to my liking.

You are more than normal Zee. You would be abnormal if you did not obsess about coffee. You would be a freak.