Why Me's Invitation Accepted: Let's Mock Other Religions!

[Guest]

In another thread, Why Me, in his righteous indignation, attempted to expose a double standard by inviting all those who mock the LDS temple endowment video on YouTube to also make fun of Judaism:

As we can see how people worship is sacred and it can seem strange for an outsider.

Come on now guys, lets have some mocking....come on...don't be shy..

I think this is a wonderful idea, Why Me. Let's you and me have some fun together by mocking the way other people worship and denigrating the things they hold sacred! At about 35:11 in a certain video is one place we can go for a good chortle! Ha ha ha! Those silly everyone-on-Earth-who-isn't-LDS people looking for meaning in life!

Now let's mock the ridiculous tenets of traditional Christianity!

"Strange Creeds of Christendom," Elder LeGrand Richards

I would like to say a few words this morning about the statement the Savior made that “their creeds are an abomination in my sight.” When Satan was cast out of heaven, the cry went out: “Woe to the inhabiters of the earth … for the devil is come down unto you, having great wrath, because he knoweth that he hath but a short time.” (Rev. 12:12.) “And thus he goeth … seeking to destroy the souls of men.” (D&C 10:27.) And how does he try to destroy people? By taking a little truth and mixing it with a lot of error to deceive the hearts of the people.

ROFL! Look at that, Why Me! All those religions that aren't the LDS Church come from Satan! Boy, nobody can mock religion like a Mormon! Har har har!

In the few minutes that I have left I would like to mention one or two examples of Satan’s deceptions. We hear constantly that all we have to do is to believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and we will be saved. The advocates of this doctrine take for their justification the statement of Jesus to the malefactor on the cross when he said, “To day shalt thou be with me in paradise.” (Luke 23:43.) (The Prophet Joseph Smith indicates that the word paradise as it appears in the Bible should have been translated as “the world of spirits.”) They think that they can all be saved just by acknowledging Jesus as the Christ. If they only understood the scriptures!

LOL! Those idiot born-again Christians! They don't even understand the Bible! All they understand are the deceptions of Satan their sacred beliefs are based on! Ha ha ha ha ha! It sure is fun mocking other people's religions! Wouldn't you agree, Why Me?

I would like to mention one other thing that I think is a creed that is “an abomination in the sight of God,” and I shall mention it but briefly. At the time that Joseph Smith had that marvelous vision and saw that glorified Christ, he saw the same Jesus that came out of the tomb. He was the same one who appeared unto his apostles and had them feel the prints in his hands and the wound in his side. He was the same one who ascended into heaven in the presence of five hundred of the brethren at that time. This same Jesus appeared to the Prophet Joseph Smith when the whole Christian world was worshiping an essence.

There is not time to go into a lot of detail, but their catechism says that their god has “no body; he has no parts; he has no passions.” That means that he has no eyes; he cannot see. He has no ears; he cannot hear your prayers. He has no voice; he cannot speak a word to the prophets. Some of them even say “he sits on the top of a topless throne.” How absurd! To me it seems that their description of the god that they believe in is about the best description of nothing that can be written.

OMG! (no pun intended) Ha ha ha ha ha!!!! Those stupid, silly Trinitarian Christians! Their "god" is a bunch of ephemeral nothing! ROFLMAO! I'm sure having a good time mocking other people's sacred beliefs! Isn't this fun, Why Me?

Whew! Okay, I have finally caught my breath and wiped the tears of helpless laughter from my eyes. What's that, Why Me? You want to keep mocking other people's sacred beliefs? All right, it's your party!

Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball

The brilliant minds with their philosophies, knowing much about the Christian traditions and the pagan philosophies, would combine all elements to please everybody. They replaced the simple ways and program of the Christ with spectacular rituals, colorful display, impressive pageantry, and limitless pomposity, and called it Christianity. They had replaced the glorious, divine plan of exaltation of Christ with an elaborate, colorful, man-made system. They seemed to have little idea of totally dethroning the Christ, nor terminating the life of God, as in our own day, but they put together an incomprehensible God idea.

Ha ha ha ha! Freaking moron theologians! All the other Christians are anti-Christs! Not even the best episodes of your favorite sitcom have this kind of comedic irony!

Jeffrey R. Holland, October 2007 General Conference

In the year A.D. 325 the Roman emperor Constantine convened the Council of Nicaea to address—among other things—the growing issue of God’s alleged “trinity in unity.” What emerged from the heated contentions of churchmen, philosophers, and ecclesiastical dignitaries came to be known (after another 125 years and three more major councils)4 as the Nicene Creed, with later reformulations such as the Athanasian Creed. These various evolutions and iterations of creeds—and others to come over the centuries—declared the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost to be abstract, absolute, transcendent, immanent, consubstantial, coeternal, and unknowable, without body, parts, or passions and dwelling outside space and time. In such creeds all three members are separate persons, but they are a single being, the oft-noted “mystery of the trinity.” They are three distinct persons, yet not three Gods but one. All three persons are incomprehensible, yet it is one God who is incomprehensible.

We agree with our critics on at least that point—that such a formulation for divinity is truly incomprehensible. With such a confusing definition of God being imposed upon the church, little wonder that a fourth-century monk cried out, “Woe is me! They have taken my God away from me, … and I know not whom to adore or to address.”5 How are we to trust, love, worship, to say nothing of strive to be like, One who is incomprehensible and unknowable? What of Jesus’s prayer to His Father in Heaven that “this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent”?

Oh, that's a good one, Jeff! That traditional Trinitarian concept of God is truly incomprehensible! The vast majority of Christians in the world worship a "god" that makes no sense whatsoever! LOL!

It is not our purpose to demean any person’s belief nor the doctrine of any religion. We extend to all the same respect for their doctrine that we are asking for ours.

You bet, Jeff! That's why faithful Latter-day Saints like Why Me love it when you say everyone else's concept of Deity makes no sense at all, but you have a conniption if anyone says anything less than respectful about the Mormon Man-God and his Eternal Pyramid Scheme from the Starbase Kolob! Right, Why Me? You're darn tootin' right! Ha ha ha! Boy, this mocking other people's religions is a laff riot!

A related reason The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is excluded from the Christian category by some is because we believe, as did the ancient prophets and apostles, in an embodied—but certainly glorified—God. To those who criticize this scripturally based belief, I ask at least rhetorically: If the idea of an embodied God is repugnant, why are the central doctrines and singularly most distinguishing characteristics of all Christianity the Incarnation, the Atonement, and the physical Resurrection of the Lord Jesus Christ? If having a body is not only not needed but not desirable by Deity, why did the Redeemer of mankind redeem His body, redeeming it from the grasp of death and the grave, guaranteeing it would never again be separated from His spirit in time or eternity? Any who dismiss the concept of an embodied God dismiss both the mortal and the resurrected Christ. No one claiming to be a true Christian will want to do that.

See that, stupid non-LDS Christians? Your "god" has to be a Man-God who is subject to space and time and has a physical body that looks just like the ones that humans evolved under the precise conditions of this planet over millions of years! If you don't agree with that, you're not true Christians at all! Har har har! Having a good time mocking other people's most sacred beliefs, Why Me? I sure am! And obviously our modern prophets and apostles are, too! LOL!

Okay, my ribs are aching and I am just about exhausted from the laughs I've had with Why Me, mocking the sacred beliefs and traditions of people who are not LDS. So I'm going to take a break for a little bit, but here's some more chuckles and chortles to remind us how pathetically stupid all those other Christians are for thinking that their "churches" in any way resemble the Church that Jesus set up when He walked the Earth:

Doctrines of the Gospel, Institute student manual

■ “For over seventeen hundred years on the eastern hemisphere, and for more than fourteen centuries on the western, there appears to have been silence between the heavens and the earth. Of direct revelation from God to man during this long interval, we have no authentic record. As already shown, the period of apostolic ministry on the eastern continent probably terminated before the dawn of the second century of the Christian era. The passing of the apostles was followed by the rapid development of a universal apostasy as had been foreseen and predicted.

“In the accomplishment of this great falling away, external and internal causes cooperated. Among the disintegrating forces acting from without, the most effective was the persistent persecution to which the saints were subjected, incident to both Judaistic and pagan opposition. Vast numbers who had professed membership and many who had been officers in the ministry deserted the Church; while a few were stimulated to greater zeal under the scourge of persecution. The general effect of opposition from the outside—of external causes of decline in faith and works considered as a whole—was the defection of individuals, resulting in a widespread apostasy from the Church. But immeasurably more serious was the result of internal dissension, schism and disruption, whereby an absolute apostasy of the Church from the way and word of God was brought about” (James E. Talmage, Jesus the Christ, 745).

■ “The most important of the internal causes by which the apostasy of the Primitive Church was brought about may be thus summarized: (1) The corrupting of the simple doctrines of the gospel of Christ by admixture with so-called philosophic systems. (2) Unauthorized additions to the prescribed rites of the Church and the introduction of vital alterations in essential ordinances. (3) Unauthorized changes in Church organization and government” (Talmage, Jesus the Christ, 748–49).

■ “If the Savior had come back to earth at the beginning of the fifth century A.D. , I doubt whether he would have recognized the Christian Church as the one that claimed descent from that which he had established, so far had it gone astray. Christianity had actually become a composite of Christian beliefs, practices, and doctrines; Jewish teachings and rituals; Greek, Roman, and Egyptian pagan philosophies; and pagan religions of various brands. The Holy Priesthood had been withdrawn from the earth. The power of godliness was no longer present in the Christian Church. Thus there was a complete falling away from the gospel which had been established by the Son of Man. The Church lay in darkness, and the darkness enveloped the earth. This spiritual darkness continued for hundreds and hundreds of years” (Milton R. Hunter, “The Missionary Assignment,” Improvement Era, Dec. 1951, 920).

■ “This is not a continuous church, nor is it one that has been reformed or redeemed. It has been restored after it was lost. It was lost—the gospel with its powers and blessings—sometime after the Savior’s crucifixion and the loss of his apostles. The laws were changed, the ordinances were changed, and the everlasting covenant was broken that the Lord Jesus Christ gave to his people in those days. There was a long period of centuries when the gospel was not available to people on this earth, because it had been changed” (Spencer W. Kimball, The Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, 423).

■ “In the early centuries of the Christian era, the apostasy came not through persecution, but by relinquishment of faith caused by the superimposing of a man-made structure upon and over the divine program. Many men with no pretense nor claim to revelation, speaking without divine authority or revelation, depending only upon their own brilliant minds, but representing as they claim the congregations of the Christians and in long conference and erudite councils, sought the creation process to make a God which all could accept.

“The brilliant minds with their philosophies, knowing much about the Christian traditions and the pagan philosophies, would combine all elements to please everybody. They replaced the simple ways and program of the Christ with spectacular rituals, colorful display, impressive pageantry, and limitless pomposity, and called it Christianity. They had replaced the glorious, divine plan of exaltation of Christ with an elaborate, colorful, man-made system. They seemed to have little idea of totally dethroning the Christ, nor terminating the life of God, as in our own day, but they put together an incomprehensible God idea” (Kimball, Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, 425).

ROFLAMO!!!! LOL!!! OMG!!!!! Anyone who isn't LDS is an idiot! Ha ha ha!!!

Why Me, my deepest thanks for reminding me of the simple joy to be found in mocking the sacred, sincerely-held religious beliefs of other people!

[_Darth J]

Actually, I think we need some visuals to get the full benefit of mocking other people's sincere, sacred beliefs! Here's a side-splitter from the children's book, Doctrine and Covenants Stories, which is published by the LDS Church and sold at church distributions centers:



LOL! Look at all those funny outfits that paid ministers wear, with their false creeds and meaningless ceremonies and lack of authority! Ha ha ha!

Don't you think that is just HILARIOUS, Why Me?

[_Darth J]

Hey, Why Me: you know who else really knows how to mock beliefs about God and Jesus that other people hold sacred and base their lives on? Dallin H. Oaks!

Dallin H. Oaks, April 1995 General Conference

We maintain that the concepts identified by such nonscriptural terms as “the incomprehensible mystery of God” and “the mystery of the Holy Trinity” are attributable to the ideas of Greek philosophy. These philosophical concepts transformed Christianity in the first few centuries following the deaths of the Apostles. For example, philosophers then maintained that physical matter was evil and that God was a spirit without feelings or passions. Persons of this persuasion, including learned men who became influential converts to Christianity, had a hard time accepting the simple teachings of early Christianity: an Only Begotten Son who said he was in the express image of his Father in Heaven and who taught his followers to be one as he and his Father were one, and a Messiah who died on a cross and later appeared to his followers as a resurrected being with flesh and bones.

The collision between the speculative world of Greek philosophy and the simple, literal faith and practice of the earliest Christians produced sharp contentions that threatened to widen political divisions in the fragmenting Roman empire. This led Emperor Constantine to convene the first churchwide council in A.D. 325. The action of this council of Nicaea remains the most important single event after the death of the Apostles in formulating the modern Christian concept of deity. The Nicene Creed erased the idea of the separate being of Father and Son by defining God the Son as being of “one substance with the Father.”

Other councils followed, and from their decisions and the writings of churchmen and philosophers there came a synthesis of Greek philosophy and Christian doctrine in which the orthodox Christians of that day lost the fulness of truth about the nature of God and the Godhead. The consequences persist in the various creeds of Christianity, which declare a Godhead of only one being and which describe that single being or God as “incomprehensible” and “without body, parts, or passions.” One of the distinguishing features of the doctrine of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is its rejection of all of these postbiblical creeds (see Stephen E. Robinson, Are Mormons Christians? Salt Lake City: Bookcraft, 1991; Encyclopedia of Mormonism, ed. Daniel H. Ludlow, 4 vols., New York: Macmillan Publishing Co., 1992, s.v. “Apostasy,” “doctrine,” “God the Father,” and “Godhead”).

In the process of what we call the Apostasy, the tangible, personal God described in the Old and New Testaments was replaced by the abstract, incomprehensible deity defined by compromise with the speculative principles of Greek philosophy. The received language of the Bible remained, but the so-called “hidden meanings” of scriptural words were now explained in the vocabulary of a philosophy alien to their origins. In the language of that philosophy, God the Father ceased to be a Father in any but an allegorical sense. He ceased to exist as a comprehensible and compassionate being. And the separate identity of his Only Begotten Son was swallowed up in a philosophical abstraction that attempted to define a common substance and an incomprehensible relationship.

LOL! That silly traditional Christianity that orders of magnitude more people follow than Mormonism! Their "god" isn't a God and their "heavenly father" isn't a Father! Ha ha ha! Don't you think that's funny, Why Me? Greek philosophy and Satan! That's where all these other "Christian" churches come from! Har har!

Now watch this:

These descriptions of a religious philosophy are surely undiplomatic, but I hasten to add that Latter-day Saints do not apply such criticism to the men and women who profess these beliefs. We believe that most religious leaders and followers are sincere believers who love God and understand and serve him to the best of their abilities. We are indebted to the men and women who kept the light of faith and learning alive through the centuries to the present day. We have only to contrast the lesser light that exists among peoples unfamiliar with the names of God and Jesus Christ to realize the great contribution made by Christian teachers through the ages. We honor them as servants of God.

Yeah, the "Christians" as human beings are okay. It's their unintelligible, false creeds that are abominations in the sight of God that are so stupid! They don't even know what their "god" is or what their relationship to "it" is! LOL! Thanks again for suggesting we mock other people's sacred beliefs, Why Me!

[_Darth J]

For those joining this thread in progress, Why Me is teaching us about the militant hypocrisy that is the LDS persecution complex (see his OP here).

That is, Latter-day Saints can dish it out, but they can't take it.

[_why me]

So, I see no one mocking other faiths. Come on guys, start mocking other people's beliefs. Ummmm...you just can't do it can you? Nope. What a bunch of hypocrites. All faiths have something strange to them. Heck, just look at the habits of nuns. Certainly for a noncatholic such habits look strange or weird. But it is okay...I understand your problem.

[_Dr. Shades]

If you can't mock other people's beliefs, then whose beliefs can you mock?

[_hobo1512]

So, I see no one mocking other faiths. Come on guys, start mocking other people's beliefs. Ummmm...you just can't do it can you? Nope. What a bunch of hypocrites. All faiths have something strange to them. Heck, just look at the habits of nuns. Certainly for a noncatholic such habits look strange or weird. But it is okay...I understand your problem.

I thought you would like a nun's habit. They are made of cotton in most cases. Isn't that what draws you to them?

[_Chap]

So, I see no one mocking other faiths. Come on guys, start mocking other people's beliefs. Ummmm...you just can't do it can you? Nope. What a bunch of hypocrites. All faiths have something strange to them. Heck, just look at the habits of nuns. Certainly for a noncatholic such habits look strange or weird. But it is okay...I understand your problem.

I thought you would like a nun's habit. They are made of cotton in most cases. Isn't that what draws you to them?

Discounting whyme's sexual weirdness (though I do wish he would stop talking about it, since that makes people quote him, so I see his posts), he seems unable to grasp the fact that this is a board called Mormon Discussions.

That means that if we talk about a religion in a neutral way, that religion will mostly be Mormonism.

If someone talks about a religion in a positive way, that religion will probably be Mormonism (see for instance whyme's posts).

If someone talks about a religion in a negative or mocking way (the two are not of course necessarily the same), that religion will probably be ... yes ... Mormonism!

I can't see why whyme should have a problem with that. But a problem he certainly has, as evidenced by his bizarre demand that posters here should start mocking other religions. Mock them yourself, whyme, if you are interested. I'm not, at least so far as this board is concerned.

And, by the way, if there was any other religion with important secret ceremonies to which only insiders were admitted, and whose content was definitive of the nature of the religion concerned, I'd have no problem with a video being posted online in order that discussion of that religion can proceed on the basis of the fullest possible evidence.

[_why me]

I thought you would like a nun's habit. They are made of cotton in most cases. Isn't that what draws you to them?

But not light cotton. Would it be okay on CAF for people at large to mock the catholic faith? Do you think that that would serve a wonderful purpose? A person's faith is personal and private and devout catholics would not like their faith mocked. What did the Bible say? Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

Can you learn from the Bible Hobo?

[_why me]

If you can't mock other people's beliefs, then whose beliefs can you mock?

Your own. America has become a strange place. People are angry, pissed off and full of piss. Nothing is sacred, all is exposed and everything is up for a good mock regardless if it hurts others. Such is the realityTV show called American Life in the 21st Century.