http://www.patheos.com/blogs/mormoninou ... -so-angry/
The reasons for the anger vary widely, but often include one or more of the following:
Feeling misled or lied to by an organization (the church) that you once trusted completely — with your full heart.
Regretting the amount of time, money, energy, and reputation that you gave to the church – under what you later discover to be deceptive and false pretenses. In some cases people have given hundreds of thousands of dollars (yen, pounds, etc.) and several decades of their lives to church service — sometimes even sacrificing meaningful educational or career opportunities — only to discover that they built their lives upon what they now view as a fraudulent foundation that sometimes causes harm to good, innocent people (e.g., LGBT, women, people of color).
It is not uncommon for a believing spouse to divorce a no-longer-believing spouse because of their loss of faith. Having your family implode, with children as the collateral damage — all over a religion that you now believe to be false — can be terribly upsetting and disruptive.
It is very common to lose one’s entire faith community, lifelong friendships, and sometimes even employment over a loss of faith. This is not an exaggeration, especially in Utah. What’s worse is that once someone leaves the church, it is not uncommon for parents, siblings, friends, and ward members to express ZERO interest in learning about or understanding why the person chose to leave. This can be so…incredibly….frustrating and disorienting — especially when it involves longstanding and intimate relationships that you once felt were solid and authentic. Still, most QDDPM are met with stone cold silence after they decide to disaffiliate. For so many, it is one of the most bizarre and anger-inducing aspects of post-Mormonism.
Perhaps the most devastating blow of all can come from believing family members — parents, siblings, spouse, children — who often come to view the non-believer as a massive disappointment, regardless of how healthy or productive their lives become after leaving the church. No one wants to feel like a disappointment to the people they love most. Feeling loved, accepted, and valued by our family members is a core emotional and psychological need — and yet religious differences often immediately dissolve long and hard-earned feelings of love and respect. I often joke that a former Mormon could cure cancer or win the Nobel Peace Prize and still be viewed as a disappointment by their believing Mormon parents, siblings, and friends. Why do QDDPM get so angry? Such family devaluing, distancing, and ultimate rejection can be devastating to someone who simply believes that they are following their conscience (and the evidence).
These are just a few of the reasons that people become angry after a loss of faith.
I think this is an interesting project that they have started.
I hope they see it through.