A 2017 Temple Recommend Interview of Joseph Smith

[_sock puppet]

Do you have faith in and a testimony of God the Eternal Father, His Son Jesus Christ, and the Holy Ghost?

JSjr: Which version of the First Vision are you asking about?

Do you have a testimony of the Atonement of Christ and of His role as Savior and Redeemer?

JSjr: Sure, but keep in mind “I have more to boast of than ever any man had. I am the only man that has ever been able to keep a whole church together since the days of Adam…Neither Paul, John, nor Jesus ever did it. I boast that no man ever did such a work as I. The followers of Jesus ran away from Him; but the Latter-day Saints never ran away from me yet.” (Church History vol 6, pp. 408-409). So the question ought to be, do I have a testimony in me,
Joseph Smith. Brother Brigham had it right in 1859 when he said “From the day that the priesthood was taken from the earth to the winding up things of all things, every man and woman must have the certificate of Joseph Smith, junior, as a passport to their entrance into the mansion where God and Christ are — I with you and you with me. I cannot go there without his consent” (Journal of Discourses 7:238. See also Search These Commandments, 1984, pg. 133).

Do you have a testimony of the restoration of the gospel in these the latter days?

JSjr: Well, if it weren't for Jesus not having returned (2nd Coming and all) as promised on my 85th birthday, 12/23/1890, I'd have a lot stronger testimony, but, yes, I suppose so.

Do you sustain the President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as the Prophet, Seer, and Revelator and as the only person on the earth who possesses and is authorized to exercise all priesthood keys? Do you sustain members of the First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles as prophets, seers, and revelators? Do you sustain the other General Authorities and local authorities of the Church?

JSjr: Thomas Monson? Heck, no. What has he prophesied about? What revelations has he proclaimed?

Do you live the law of chastity?

JSjr: Please be more specific. If you don't count the barn and a dozen or so other places, sure.

Is there anything in your conduct relating to members of your family that is not in harmony with the teachings of the Church?

JSjr: Well, I didn't get Emma's approval for taking extra 'wives', as requireed for The Principle as set forth in the revelation (D&C 132).

Do you support, affiliate with, or agree with any group or individual whose teachings or practices are contrary to or oppose those accepted by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints?

JSjr: You have heard about my Council of Fifty, haven't you?

Do you strive to keep the covenants you have made, to attend your sacrament and other meetings, and to keep your life in harmony with the laws and commandments of the gospel?

JSjr: Well, there was that pesky Article on Marriage in the Book of Commandments since Aug 17, 1835 and then the Doctrine and Covenants. And, the way I did it, I didn't quite abide by the requirements for The Principle as set forth in the revelation (D&C 132). Gosh, I didn't even raise up much of a seed, righteous or otherwise, as Jacob 2:30 suggests.

Are you honest in your dealings with your fellowmen?

JSjr: Now, let's not bring up that glass-looking for hire thing again, or the Kirtland Anti-Banking Society, or...yada, yada, yada

Are you a full-tithe payer? Do your keep the Word of Wisdom?

JSjr: Will you people never stop? After all I've given to the church, just because Lorenzo said so, I don't think you should expect me to give any money. As for the WoW, you don't count beer and cigars, right? And it is okay for me to own a saloon, right?

Do you have financial or other obligations to a former spouse or children? If yes, are you current in meeting those obligations?

JSjr: Oh, no. I never promised any spiritual wives a thing, and Dr Bennett made sure I don't have children to which I owe obligations.

If you have previously received your temple endowment: Do you keep the covenants that you made in the temple? Do you wear the garment both night and day as instructed in the endowment and in accordance with the covenant you made in the temple?

JSjr: Not all the time. It's hot and muggy in Illinois in late June. But I did have my trust Jupiter Talisman with me for good luck.

Have there been any sins or misdeeds in your life that should have been resolved with priesthood authorities but have not been?

JSjr: LOL. When you're me, who has priesthood authority over me? That's a good one, a real knee-slapper.

Do you consider yourself worthy to enter the Lord's house and participate in temple ordinances?

JSjr: The better question is whether the Lord, who couldn't keep a church together, is worthy to enter my Mansion House.

[_Maksutov]

Well done, Sock!