Predictable pseudonymous critics making predictions in predictable online circles

[drumdude]

Prediction, as the saying goes, is very difficult. Especially when it’s about the future.

Somewhat more than eleven and a half years ago on a far-away message board, a pseudonymous critic took it upon himself to prophesy. And this is what he said. This is what that critic said:

By Jan. 1, 2014 Interpreter will be dead. . . . Either totally dead or down to token “blog” style postings. (Bond James Bond, 25 January 2013)

The Interpreter Foundation was about five and a half months old when he pronounced his oracle. Today, it’s somewhat more than twelve years of age.

He seems to have disappeared for quite a while, not emitting even token “blog”-style postings. But he’s now back (under an abbreviated but recognizable pseudonym). And, obviously buoyed by the precision, accuracy, and success of his previous exercise in vaticination — Interpreter has long been almost totally dead, and barely on life-support — he has recently returned to prophecy.

Within a hundred years, he predicts, there will be only a million members in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, although it will have an investment fund of a trillion dollars.

Alas, though, it will obviously be a little bit difficult — a century from now — for him, or for anybody who saw his latest prophecy when it appeared, or for any of us here to confirm or deny his accuracy.

Happily, though, one of Bond’s disciples — “Deutero-Bond,” one might call her — has stepped forward to revise the initial prophecy: Says Deutero-Bond, the Church will count only a million members (and a trillion dollars in assets?) within just ten years!

Now, this is a prophecy that many of us living today will still be around to verify.

Curiously, the zest for prophesying seems to have become contagious. Another in the same online location has declared that Dallin H. Oaks will prove the downfall of the Church. Which should, given even a minimal knowledge of actuarial science, be a testable prediction. I’m reminded of a little-known textual variant of 1 Samuel 10:10-11:

And when they came thither to the hill, behold, a company of prophets met him; and the Spirit of Bond came upon him, and he prophesied among them.

And it came to pass, when all that knew him beforetime saw that, behold, he prophesied among the prophets, then the people said one to another, What is this that is come unto the son of Shirts? Is Kerry also among the prophets?

I’ve been accused by at least one (predictable) anonymous critic of being obsessed with Hulu’s miniseries The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives. The accusation is (predictably) false; I haven’t watched so much as a second of it, and I very likely never will, not just out of principle and protest but because I’m just not interested and I have too many other, better, things to do. And I probably won’t ever think about it again after it has receded into the rear-view mirror. My world will go on quite unchanged.

Right now, though, my news feed is absolutely bursting with articles about The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, very often to the exclusion of anything else, and it’s apparently drawing considerably more attention than its subject merits. (As I’ve said before, I’m astonished and somewhat discouraged at the interest it seems to have generated in some circles.)

https://www.patheos.com/blogs/danpeters ... uture.html


Dan is really starting to lose the plot…

[Doctor Scratch]

Some strange things have definitely been afoot over there lately. For example, I noticed that the Afore upvoted a comment in which another poster was engaging in blatantly racist mockery of another poster’s name.

[Philo Sofee]

Some strange things have definitely been afoot over there lately. For example, I noticed that the Afore upvoted a comment in which another poster was engaging in blatantly racist mockery of another poster’s name.

It's hilarious that he actually wants to imagine my comment as a prophecy as well. Shirts is not among the prophets anymore than Nelson is. Peterson knows this, he just hates admitting it.

[I Have Questions]

Interpreter is down to blog style postings from a fairly narrow (mainly white male?) list of authors. All producing a lot of words that move nothing forward in terms of insight or learning in regards to the understanding of Mormonism. Would knowledge about the Church be any worse off if Interpreter stopped tomorrow? What key progress in terms of the Church has been enacted by Interpreter?

Here’s an idea. Why doesn’t Dan take some of the content from Interpreter and approach the relevant departments within Universities to see if they’ll add any of it as required reading for any of the courses therein. Has BYU adopted any of it? Had the Church included any of it or referenced anny of it within its reading material?

Is Witnesses available via the Church website?