malkie has GREAT buns - official

The Off-Topic forum for anything non-LDS related. No insults or personal attacks allowed. Rated G.
User avatar
malkie
God
Posts: 1464
Joined: Wed Oct 28, 2020 2:41 pm

malkie has GREAT buns - official

Post by malkie »

Several years ago I inadvertently took part in a competition for knobbly knees, and was awarded second place. I should have won, but one of my fellow competitors was drunk, and became belligerent when he was told he hadn't won, so they gave him first place, and I, with my superior knee knobbles, had to settle for second place.

Last weekend, however, I entered a contest at the county fair, and my buns were judged the best of the bun-ch.

I wish I could go back to the earlier competition and challenge that wee mingin' nyaff to a rematch, but with buns on display in place of knees.
You can help Ukraine by talking for an hour a week!! PM me, or check www.enginprogram.org for details.
Слава Україні!, 𝑺𝒍𝒂𝒗𝒂 𝑼𝒌𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒏𝒊!
User avatar
Dr. Shades
Founder and Visionary
Posts: 1825
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2020 2:48 pm
Contact:

Re: malkie has GREAT buns - official

Post by Dr. Shades »

Have you been drinking?
"It’s ironic that the Church that people claim to be true, puts so much effort into hiding truths."
--I Have Questions, 01-25-2024
User avatar
Physics Guy
God
Posts: 1504
Joined: Tue Oct 27, 2020 7:40 am
Location: on the battlefield of life

Re: malkie has GREAT buns - official

Post by Physics Guy »

Malvolio wrote:Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them.
But I trust that cosmetic surgery was not involved in this case.
I was a teenager before it was cool.
User avatar
Gadianton
God
Posts: 3815
Joined: Sun Oct 25, 2020 11:56 pm
Location: Elsewhere

Re: malkie has GREAT buns - official

Post by Gadianton »

and became belligerent when he was told he hadn't won, so they gave him first place, and I, with my superior knee knobbles, had to settle for second place
Great point. According to Ajax, Binger, and possibly a few others around here, Donald Trump should have won because he and his supporters are so hopping mad about it. And that kind of energy is difficult to fight when it bleeds into lawyers and other elected officials and people with money and a whole lot of people who are willing to go along with it (like the two mentioned here) even if they don't really believe it.

I had a similar experience. I was taking a bunch of GE classes including P.E. classes at a local college that was nearby so I could transfer the credits and get my university degree while working fulltime at that point. I had zero investment in any of them, especially P.E. One was a racquetball class. I was never much of an athlete, especially with team sports. But, there were exceptions, racquetball was apparently one of them. So we're in the "finals" to determine the class winner. I go up against this guy who looks like your typical all-around athlete and he's probably as type A as A-Mike thinks of himself. By the time it's something like 8-0, this guy is ready to explode. Yelling, screaming, cussing, fake throwing his racquet. Now, to his credit, he isn't cheating and arguing over points (like Ajax and Binger) he knows he didn't win. But he's so upset I just didn't want to deal with it (like Ajax running his mouth about civil war all the time if he doesn't get his way) anymore so I backed off and he won. Now, he did start doing better and he did well enough near the end that I can't say for certain I would have won. But, you get the idea.

(I understand this post may end up getting moved to a different forum :oops: )
User avatar
malkie
God
Posts: 1464
Joined: Wed Oct 28, 2020 2:41 pm

Re: malkie has GREAT buns - official

Post by malkie »

Dr. Shades wrote:
Wed Aug 30, 2023 9:02 am
Have you been drinking?
I don't drink alcohol, or use "drugs".

This is not the malkie you're used to - either here or in another place, right? But that's no reason for you to suggest that I'm not in full control of my faculties.

If there is sufficient demand, I'll supply photographic evidence.
You can help Ukraine by talking for an hour a week!! PM me, or check www.enginprogram.org for details.
Слава Україні!, 𝑺𝒍𝒂𝒗𝒂 𝑼𝒌𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒏𝒊!
User avatar
malkie
God
Posts: 1464
Joined: Wed Oct 28, 2020 2:41 pm

Re: malkie has GREAT buns - official

Post by malkie »

Physics Guy wrote:
Wed Aug 30, 2023 12:32 pm
Malvolio wrote:Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them.
But I trust that cosmetic surgery was not involved in this case.
I made use of nothing that is not freely available to almost anyone - definitely no surgery involved.

If you like, I can provide details of my "methods".
You can help Ukraine by talking for an hour a week!! PM me, or check www.enginprogram.org for details.
Слава Україні!, 𝑺𝒍𝒂𝒗𝒂 𝑼𝒌𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒏𝒊!
User avatar
malkie
God
Posts: 1464
Joined: Wed Oct 28, 2020 2:41 pm

Re: malkie has GREAT buns - official

Post by malkie »

Gadianton wrote:
Wed Aug 30, 2023 2:31 pm
and became belligerent when he was told he hadn't won, so they gave him first place, and I, with my superior knee knobbles, had to settle for second place
Great point. According to Ajax, Binger, and possibly a few others around here, Donald Trump should have won because he and his supporters are so hopping mad about it. And that kind of energy is difficult to fight when it bleeds into lawyers and other elected officials and people with money and a whole lot of people who are willing to go along with it (like the two mentioned here) even if they don't really believe it.

I had a similar experience. I was taking a bunch of GE classes including P.E. classes at a local college that was nearby so I could transfer the credits and get my university degree while working fulltime at that point. I had zero investment in any of them, especially P.E. One was a racquetball class. I was never much of an athlete, especially with team sports. But, there were exceptions, racquetball was apparently one of them. So we're in the "finals" to determine the class winner. I go up against this guy who looks like your typical all-around athlete and he's probably as type A as A-Mike thinks of himself. By the time it's something like 8-0, this guy is ready to explode. Yelling, screaming, cussing, fake throwing his racquet. Now, to his credit, he isn't cheating and arguing over points (like Ajax and Binger) he knows he didn't win. But he's so upset I just didn't want to deal with it (like Ajax running his mouth about civil war all the time if he doesn't get his way) anymore so I backed off and he won. Now, he did start doing better and he did well enough near the end that I can't say for certain I would have won. But, you get the idea.

(I understand this post may end up getting moved to a different forum :oops: )
To be fair to the wee nyaff who was awarded first place, his knees were not bad - just not quite up to the standard I had set. And I believe that it would not have mattered what the competition was for, assuming that he even knew which anatomical parts were being judged that day.

I think he just hated the fact that he was up there on the stage, along with the rest of us Scots, with our pants legs rolled up, and the spotlight had fallen on someone other than him.

The organizers of the competition apologized to me (!!), and explained that they didn't want a fight to break out, which it might well have done - this was Glasgow in the 1970s, and a fairly tough place at the best of times.

I accepted the calling to be peacemaker. But, as you can tell, never quite got over my disappointment.
You can help Ukraine by talking for an hour a week!! PM me, or check www.enginprogram.org for details.
Слава Україні!, 𝑺𝒍𝒂𝒗𝒂 𝑼𝒌𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒏𝒊!
User avatar
Physics Guy
God
Posts: 1504
Joined: Tue Oct 27, 2020 7:40 am
Location: on the battlefield of life

Re: malkie has GREAT buns - official

Post by Physics Guy »

Dr. Shades wrote:
Wed Aug 30, 2023 9:02 am
Have you been drinking?
No, this is serious stuff.
Popular old marching song in many Highland regiments around the world wrote:Heuch! Glenwhorple Hielan'men!
Great strong whusky-suppin' Hielan'men,
Hard-workin', hairy-leggit Hielan'men,
Slainte mhor Glenwhorple.
Knees, buns, hair: women worry about these issues in many countries but the Scots are fussy about leg-related anatomy in men as well. It might be from kilts, but it evidently extends at least as far into the Lowlands as Glasgow.
I was a teenager before it was cool.
User avatar
malkie
God
Posts: 1464
Joined: Wed Oct 28, 2020 2:41 pm

Re: malkie has GREAT buns - official

Post by malkie »

Physics Guy wrote:
Wed Aug 30, 2023 8:39 pm
Dr. Shades wrote:
Wed Aug 30, 2023 9:02 am
Have you been drinking?
No, this is serious stuff.
Popular old marching song in many Highland regiments around the world wrote:Heuch! Glenwhorple Hielan'men!
Great strong whusky-suppin' Hielan'men,
Hard-workin', hairy-leggit Hielan'men,
Slainte mhor Glenwhorple.
Knees, buns, hair: women worry about these issues in many countries but the Scots are fussy about leg-related anatomy in men as well. It might be from kilts, but it evidently extends at least as far into the Lowlands as Glasgow.
Thanks, PG, for this clear explanation.
You can help Ukraine by talking for an hour a week!! PM me, or check www.enginprogram.org for details.
Слава Україні!, 𝑺𝒍𝒂𝒗𝒂 𝑼𝒌𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒏𝒊!
User avatar
canpakes
God
Posts: 7030
Joined: Wed Oct 28, 2020 1:25 am

Re: malkie has GREAT buns - official

Post by canpakes »

I might be disappointed if this is not about the edible kind of buns, malkie. : D
Post Reply