My RfM Post "Waiting for William" and Mormon Reply

[_Inconceivable]

I also get annoyed at how often supposed sin is tied to tragedy as some of those posters did...

Me too


FFOJ: Former friends of Job


It's best to avoid these people before they forsake and destroy you with their assumptions.

[_Yoda]

That's probably part of what upset the bishop. My husband and I had both made permanent decisions on birth control and I guess it irritated the bishop that we didn't ask permission first. The bishop said specifically that my husband should have spoken with him first and that it was frowned upon by the Lord for him to have a vasectomy. I'd never heard that before.

KA

That's complete b***s***. The man is not an idiot, he's an ass!

It is NO ONE's business but yours, your husband's, and the Lord's, what type of birth control you practice, or medical treatment you receive.

[_Mary]

Big hugs Kimberly Ann.

The response from the active member to your post, reveals more about their immature and insular and judgemental mindset than it does about yours.

Until someone has miscarried (like you, I have miscarried 3 times, one with twins) or lost a child (God forbid), I don't think they can really understand what it is like.
for what it's worth in the same position, I would have done 'exactly' the same thing as you. I would have trusted the blessing as God's will.

These men have to be so careful when giving blessings, even when done with a kind heart and the best intentions.

One priesthood holder was mature enough to accept that he may have given me his own wishes in a blessing, rather than Gods.

His wife, of course, was of the opinion that it was my fault that the blessing turned out to be utterly wrong.

Again, big hugs.

Mary

[_The Nehor]

That's probably part of what upset the bishop. My husband and I had both made permanent decisions on birth control and I guess it irritated the bishop that we didn't ask permission first. The bishop said specifically that my husband should have spoken with him first and that it was frowned upon by the Lord for him to have a vasectomy. I'd never heard that before.

KA

I missed that part of the story. Maybe I'm way off here but I always figured if I am ever a Bishop my job is to counsel the congregation on these kinds of personal matters only if I am invited into the situation and then I try to have enough humility and flexibility to weigh the case on the merits and realize that they have more knowledge of the situation than I do and short of God giving me direct orders I should advise and let them make their own decision hoping that what I know and am inspired to say will have a positive impact on their decision-making process.

I don't want to judge the man without knowing him and all the extenuating circumstances that both you and he were under but based on what you said I agree with Liz, the man sounds like a jackass with an unhealthy interest in your life or just a run-of-the-mill control freak.

[_Yoda]

I don't want to judge the man without knowing him and all the extenuating circumstances that both you and he were under but based on what you said I agree with Liz, the man sounds like a jackass with an unhealthy interest in your life or just a run-of-the-mill control freak.

Great minds think alike! LOL I knew I liked you, Nehor! ;)

[_Seven]

. Now we just laugh when people ask us if we're having any more kids. We can answer with surety that we are not!

That's probably part of what upset the bishop. My husband and I had both made permanent decisions on birth control and I guess it irritated the bishop that we didn't ask permission first. The bishop said specifically that my husband should have spoken with him first and that it was frowned upon by the Lord for him to have a vasectomy. I'd never heard that before.

KA

A TBM family member of mine who has access to the church handbook told me about 4 years ago that vasectomies are against the church. It was in response to his son discussing that he was considering having one. Rollo would be the person to clarify if what I was told is accurate. I also wonder if the CHI mentions women having their tubes tied?

[_Dr. Shades]

Sorry, I guess I wasn't very clear. I told the bishop myself afterward. That's when he told me I should have consulted him first.

Why bother telling the bishop anything? I don't see how it's any of his business.

At any rate, he had a vasectomy and within days I had a hysterectomy, so he got snipped for nothing.

In that case, why did he bother with getting snipped? They sell certain prophylactic devices at Wal-Mart that prevent pregnancy just fine.

That's probably part of what upset the bishop. My husband and I had both made permanent decisions on birth control and I guess it irritated the bishop that we didn't ask permission first. The bishop said specifically that my husband should have spoken with him first and that it was frowned upon by the Lord for him to have a vasectomy.

So your husband told him he'd had a vasectomy? What business of the bishop's was it to know that?

I'd never heard that before.

That's 'cause they don't share the Church Handbook of Instructions. You can't be faulted for not knowing something you weren't informed of.

[_Yoda]

This is a direct quote from the 1998 version of the Church Handbook of Instructions:

Surgical Sterilization (Including Vasectomy)

The Church strongly discourages surgical sterilization as an elective form of birth control. It should be considered only if (1) medical conditions seriously jeopardize life or health or (2) birth defects or serious trauma have rendered a person mentally incompetent and not responsible for his or her actions. Such conditions must be determined by competent medical judgment and in accordance with law. Even then, the persons responsible for this decision should consult with each other and with their bishop and should receive divine confirmation of their decision through prayer.

The full handbook is available online at the following URL:
http://www.provocation.net/chi/chi99.htm#policies1

The bolded emphasis is mine.

Even with this bolded emphasis, in my opinion, the bishop who handled Kimberly Anne's case is an ass.

There were obviously extenuating medical circumstances with her situation, which any doof should have been able to figure out.

[_Who Knows]

The church doesn't try to control people. Silly antis!

[_Runtu]

The church doesn't try to control people. Silly antis!

I have a drawer full of white underwear that says otherwise.