WARNING!! Hiking on Sunday will cause Lou Gehrigs disease!!

The catch-all forum for general topics and debates. Minimal moderation. Rated PG to PG-13.
_Nephi

Post by _Nephi »

The Nehor wrote:
SatanWasSetUp wrote:
Some Schmo wrote:Connecting a disease to disobedience is done very rarely and when it does happen it tends to be done by the Nazi Mormon crowd who are also convinced that Diet Coke is as bad as Heroin.

Well, I did know a guy who used to shoot up Diet Coke. He's a vegitable now, and has Lou Gehrig's Disease... Any questions?
_asbestosman
_Emeritus
Posts: 6215
Joined: Tue Nov 07, 2006 10:32 pm

Post by _asbestosman »

If Lou Gehrig's is the punishment for breaking the Sabbath, I wonder what the punishment is for skipping out on Saturday Stake/General conference sessions? Parkinson’s?
That's General Leo. He could be my friend if he weren't my enemy.
eritis sicut dii
I support NCMO
_Some Schmo
_Emeritus
Posts: 15602
Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2007 2:59 pm

Post by _Some Schmo »

asbestosman wrote:If Lou Gehrig's is the punishment for breaking the Sabbath, I wonder what the punishment is for skipping out on Saturday Stake/General conference sessions? Parkinson’s?


No, you're just subjected to 200 straight viewings of Saturday's Warriors in the afterlife.

EDIT: And by the way, it's this sort of thing that causes people to describe the afterlife as an eternity.
God belief is for people who don't want to live life on the universe's terms.
_asbestosman
_Emeritus
Posts: 6215
Joined: Tue Nov 07, 2006 10:32 pm

Post by _asbestosman »

Some Schmo wrote:No, you're just subjected to 200 straight viewings of Saturday's Warriors in the afterlife.


I take it I couldn't serve the sentances concurrently--kinda like how God has to listen to several hundred million concurrent prayers?
That's General Leo. He could be my friend if he weren't my enemy.
eritis sicut dii
I support NCMO
_Runtu
_Emeritus
Posts: 16721
Joined: Sun Nov 05, 2006 5:06 am

Post by _Runtu »

Some Schmo wrote:
asbestosman wrote:If Lou Gehrig's is the punishment for breaking the Sabbath, I wonder what the punishment is for skipping out on Saturday Stake/General conference sessions? Parkinson’s?


No, you're just subjected to 200 straight viewings of Saturday's Warriors in the afterlife.

EDIT: And by the way, it's this sort of thing that causes people to describe the afterlife as an eternity.


I thought skipping such meetings just meant more time on Sunday without boredom.
Runtu's Rincón

If you just talk, I find that your mouth comes out with stuff. -- Karl Pilkington
_asbestosman
_Emeritus
Posts: 6215
Joined: Tue Nov 07, 2006 10:32 pm

Post by _asbestosman »

Some Schmo wrote:EDIT: And by the way, it's this sort of thing that causes people to describe the afterlife as an eternity.

I am reminded of the time Homer died by choking on a donut wherupon his spirit rises from his body and also chokes on the donut. Whereupon his spirit's spirit rises and . . .

I think my spirit would choke on its own vomit.
That's General Leo. He could be my friend if he weren't my enemy.
eritis sicut dii
I support NCMO
_Some Schmo
_Emeritus
Posts: 15602
Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2007 2:59 pm

Post by _Some Schmo »

asbestosman wrote:
Some Schmo wrote:No, you're just subjected to 200 straight viewings of Saturday's Warriors in the afterlife.


I take it I couldn't serve the sentances concurrently--kinda like how God has to listen to several hundred million concurrent prayers?


No, because if you watched 200 performances of Southwest concurrently, it would just be like watching something at the mall... all the screens show the same thing.

The prayers are all different though...

Wait a second; I guess they aren't all different. In fact, prayers are just as generic as Mormon musicals!

Hmph. I guess that seems fair, man.
God belief is for people who don't want to live life on the universe's terms.
_Nephi

Post by _Nephi »

asbestosman wrote:If Lou Gehrig's is the punishment for breaking the Sabbath, I wonder what the punishment is for skipping out on Saturday Stake/General conference sessions? Parkinson’s?

I think its Alzheimer's, but I can't remember.
_Nephi

Post by _Nephi »

asbestosman wrote:If Lou Gehrig's is the punishment for breaking the Sabbath, I wonder what the punishment is for skipping out on Saturday Stake/General conference sessions? Parkinson’s?

I think its Alzheimer's, but I can't remember.
_bcspace
_Emeritus
Posts: 18534
Joined: Mon Dec 04, 2006 6:48 pm

Post by _bcspace »

WARNING!! Hiking on Sunday will cause Lou Gehrigs disease!!


I thought it was emrods.
Machina Sublime
Satan's Plan Deconstructed.
Your Best Resource On Joseph Smith's Polygamy.
Conservatism is the Gospel of Christ and the Plan of Salvation in Action.
The Degeneracy Of Progressivism.
Post Reply