Playing tricks on missionaries

[_mocnarf]

Have you ever played a trick on a missionary? What have been your the best tricks?

One trick I like to play to play the interested but nerves prospect. It plays out like this:

Missionaries come to the door, nock and I answer. They give their normal intro, and they ask if
they can come in to share their good news with me. With a nerves voice I will tell them of coarse
come on in..... but first will you please knock the dust of your shoes outside. This usually gets a
grin or smile from them... Then, I go on to tell them about how Ms Wilson from down the street
had (several months ago) given the missionaries such a hard time that when they left her house
they immediately dusted their feet of on her porch and the next day Ms. Wilson had a stroke. Oh,
pour Ms Wilson, she never fully recovered.

So, I say: I don't want you to have any dust on your shoes to knock off when you leave my house. My JW
brothers and sisters have told me that you boys can package up satans lies and can rap them up
and put them in a book and call it of God. So now, what is it you want to talk about? Oh I only have
5 minutes before I need to leave for my church meeting. Can you make it fast?

[_Some Schmo]

Since submitting my letter of resignation, the missionaries have stopped coming by.

[_barrelomonkeys]

I serve them lemonade or ice water, let them sit on my porch swing while I pleasantly smile and chat with them. Then tell them I just feel incredibly uncomfortable talking about matters of faith or religiosity in general but appreciate them coming by. That's about as trickstery as I get.

LDS have only come by once. I get a lot of JWs.

When I was married to my ex-husband he whipped out his Satanic Bible and various religious texts and talked to them for quite a while. They kept coming back to our home with more and more people. It irritated me but I let him have his fun. I thought it was childish. I didn't participate in that.

[_Dr. Shades]

I've related this story before, but here's how one guy at RfM responded to a missionary:

He said, "How can I know that you are true messengers from Father?"

The missionary responded by giving him one of the signs and tokens of the Melchizedek Priesthood.

[_Runtu]

I've related this story before, but here's how one guy at RfM responded to a missionary:

He said, "How can I know that you are true messengers from Father?"

The missionary responded by giving him one of the signs and tokens of the Melchizedek Priesthood.

When I was in the MTC, the Sunday instructor was teaching about the Word of Wisdom. She was explaining the promise associated with keeping the WofW:

"And all saints who remember to keep and do these sayings, walking in obedience to the commandments, shall receive health in their navel and marrow to their bones" except she continued with a certain other covenant with similar wording. She caught herself and stood there, looking like a deer in the headlights. A missionary helpfully finished the covenant, and not the one from section 89. I think half the people in that room thought we would all be struck by lightning. I've never seen so many horrified faces.

[_karl61]

I have not had missionaries come to my door, ton's of JW's, but no elders. I always liked the stories of the women who answer the door naked as I thought those were real funny.

[_mocnarf]

Runtu, (or anyone) please explain, what these phrases mean and why they would word it like this, It just seems so odd and if you think about it (of coarse , your not supposed to think about this things but if you did) it really doesn't mean anything.

shall receive health in their navel and marrow to their bones

Why just 'health in your navel' wouldn't you what your whole body to be healthy?

And, 'marrow to the bones' this might be particularly important to the leukemia but theirs not a person alive that doesn't have marrow in their bones.

Are these just some old english sayings/expressions or did Joseph Smith just make them up?

These phrases just make no sense to me. Maybe Nehor can enlighten me.

[_SatanWasSetUp]

I've related this story before, but here's how one guy at RfM responded to a missionary:

He said, "How can I know that you are true messengers from Father?"

The missionary responded by giving him one of the signs and tokens of the Melchizedek Priesthood.

LOL. Classic. I think the best trick would be to rig up a holographic projector, like the fake ghosts on Scooby-Doo, so that when the missionaries try to shake your hand, their hand goes through it, then they will know you are a messenger from the Adversary.