Marie "dances" while her son goes into rehab

[_BishopRic]

I'm reading this thread and my blood is boiling.

I'm the mother of a daughter in recovery. Her drug of choice: Oxycontin. She is in her twenties, has been clean for almost 2 years, and her father and I are helping her with her treatment even though she is over 18. Why? Because we love her so much and want her to live.

Take a look at my location: Orem. The drug problem is alive and thriving in Ut. County and we are losing kids everyday from the overdoses. Is Mormonism the cause? Perhaps, but I doubt it. We didn't raise our daughter in a strict Mormon environment. Maybe it had something to do with her parents divorce, maybe her sister's death. Maybe it's the Doctor's fault for prescribing her Percocet for menstrual cramps with refills. Maybe it was the peer pressure. Whatever the cause making judgement doesn't help.

When I watched Marie speak about her son, my heart went out to her. I know what it's like to lose a child and I know what it's like to watch another struggle with addiction. She is doing the right thing and didn't ask for her very private situation to be broadcast over national television. I thought her response was good. She was honest and open knowing that maybe her experience can help another family facing this all too prevelant problem.

Polygamy Porter, stop being such an A$$. Go back to what you do best and post your witty, sarcastic remarks that bring a smile to us Exmo's. Your giving the Former Mormon cause a bad name when you act like this.

Marie Osmond and her brothers have demonstrated that they are indeed, the perfect family. Perfect in the love and support that they openly express to each other. Perfect in the way they honor their parents. Perfect in the way that they handle the very normal dysfunction that EVERY family has.

I admire Marie. I've met her several times and I found her to be friendly, caring and not at all self-righteous. And as far as her dancing goes....She's 48 years old and can kick that high?!? You go girl!!!

Thanks for your thoughts.

Okay, finally a minute to catch up on this. Wow! Some strong emotions here, and I must say Tori's post brought a tear (or two, as she knows) to my eye. You see, Tori is my fiance. One thing that brought us together (besides Match.com!) was some common challenges. She mentioned her daughter's struggles with Oxycontin. As a drug counselor, I've been able to help her a bit the last few years, and she is doing amazingly well today.

As some know, I'm an eye doctor. But about 15 years ago I had an injury that started me on the road to pain pill dependence. It happened while I was in the bishopric, and an acting bishop for a short stint. I had learned some troubling things about church administration in my stake. I also was introduced to Grant Palmer, who I studied with while he was doing research for his future book. The conflict certainly added to my confusion about my life's path. The pills not only managed my physical pain, but my emotional pain as well. I did some things I shouldn't have, and I had my license suspended for a few years. The rehab I was (thankfully) forced to go through taught me much about addiction...and the MANY causes for it.

Was "Mormonism" a cause for me? At the time, I said yes. The conflict between what I had thought was the only way to live, and what I was learning about its history was disturbing. But, I also learned it was an excuse for me. It was an escape that was temporarily relieving for me...but please note the "temporary." There is an acronym we use in recovery circles: SOBER: "son of a bitch, everything's real!" For most that have been able to kick addiction for a significant time have learned that we have to take responsibility for our life, and stop blaming all our troubles on outside issues. It's not easy, but I've learned that long term recovery requires it.

So today I do NOT blame Mormonism. I really try to keep an attitude that we are all doing the best we can with what we have. All of us! I also feel for Marie...sure, her circumstances may have created some pressure for her and her kids. She appears to have survived it quite well. She is definitely talented. I think she and her family have helped put Utah on the map. I respect her/them for that. Having been through it myself, I have nothing but best wishes for her and her family!

[_LifeOnaPlate]

Come on, your reality is raining on our hate parade!

[_Trinity]

I'm reading this thread and my blood is boiling.

I'm the mother of a daughter in recovery. Her drug of choice: Oxycontin. She is in her twenties, has been clean for almost 2 years, and her father and I are helping her with her treatment even though she is over 18. Why? Because we love her so much and want her to live.

Take a look at my location: Orem. The drug problem is alive and thriving in Ut. County and we are losing kids everyday from the overdoses. Is Mormonism the cause? Perhaps, but I doubt it. We didn't raise our daughter in a strict Mormon environment. Maybe it had something to do with her parents divorce, maybe her sister's death. Maybe it's the Doctor's fault for prescribing her Percocet for menstrual cramps with refills. Maybe it was the peer pressure. Whatever the cause making judgement doesn't help.

When I watched Marie speak about her son, my heart went out to her. I know what it's like to lose a child and I know what it's like to watch another struggle with addiction. She is doing the right thing and didn't ask for her very private situation to be broadcast over national television. I thought her response was good. She was honest and open knowing that maybe her experience can help another family facing this all too prevelant problem.

Polygamy Porter, stop being such an A$$. Go back to what you do best and post your witty, sarcastic remarks that bring a smile to us Exmo's. Your giving the Former Mormon cause a bad name when you act like this.

Marie Osmond and her brothers have demonstrated that they are indeed, the perfect family. Perfect in the love and support that they openly express to each other. Perfect in the way they honor their parents. Perfect in the way that they handle the very normal dysfunction that EVERY family has.

I admire Marie. I've met her several times and I found her to be friendly, caring and not at all self-righteous. And as far as her dancing goes....She's 48 years old and can kick that high?!? You go girl!!!

Thanks for your thoughts.

Okay, finally a minute to catch up on this. Wow! Some strong emotions here, and I must say Tori's post brought a tear (or two, as she knows) to my eye. You see, Tori is my fiance. One thing that brought us together (besides Match.com!) was some common challenges. She mentioned her daughter's struggles with Oxycontin. As a drug counselor, I've been able to help her a bit the last few years, and she is doing amazingly well today.

As some know, I'm an eye doctor. But about 15 years ago I had an injury that started me on the road to pain pill dependence. It happened while I was in the bishopric, and an acting bishop for a short stint. I had learned some troubling things about church administration in my stake. I also was introduced to Grant Palmer, who I studied with while he was doing research for his future book. The conflict certainly added to my confusion about my life's path. The pills not only managed my physical pain, but my emotional pain as well. I did some things I shouldn't have, and I had my license suspended for a few years. The rehab I was (thankfully) forced to go through taught me much about addiction...and the MANY causes for it.

Was "Mormonism" a cause for me? At the time, I said yes. The conflict between what I had thought was the only way to live, and what I was learning about its history was disturbing. But, I also learned it was an excuse for me. It was an escape that was temporarily relieving for me...but please note the "temporary." There is an acronym we use in recovery circles: SOBER: "son of a bitch, everything's real!" For most that have been able to kick addiction for a significant time have learned that we have to take responsibility for our life, and stop blaming all our troubles on outside issues. It's not easy, but I've learned that long term recovery requires it.

So today I do NOT blame Mormonism. I really try to keep an attitude that we are all doing the best we can with what we have. All of us! I also feel for Marie...sure, her circumstances may have created some pressure for her and her kids. She appears to have survived it quite well. She is definitely talented. I think she and her family have helped put Utah on the map. I respect her/them for that. Having been through it myself, I have nothing but best wishes for her and her family!

Hey Bishopric,

Tori's blood is not the only one boiling. My oldest daughter was in a treatment center for about 18 months due to all sorts of things.......a primary factor being the suicide of her 18 year old stake-president's son boyfriend. She decided she didn't want to live anymore and went through overwhelming grief and tried to self destruct using any number of illegal drugs. She was absolutely immune to suggestion from anyone - her parents, her family, her friends, her church leaders and believe you me it was no walk in the park to watch her spiral like she did and feeling helpless to change the situation.

About 120K, hundreds of sleepless nights, and four years later, she is what we consider recovered. She is much more mature than her 19 year old peer counterparts. The suicide happened when she was just short of 16 and it robbed her of any innocence she may have had and completely turned the lives of our family upside down. While she was in treatment, I learned about all of the drugs along this lovely Wasatch Front, and the sheer number of teens in treatment centers (not to mention the number of treatment centers themselves) was staggering. It is something people don't talk about unless they are forced to. Because of idiotic people like on this thread that want to blame parents for the behaviors of the children, the experience is traumatizing, isolating and embarrassing for parents...which actually makes recovery worse. As part of the treatment we had parent therapy sessions wherein a dozen parents or so would sit and discuss how they were feeling. Most of the time the comments were like "How in the world did we end up here?" "What did we do wrong? We taught our child correctly." There were church leaders and civic figures, the principal of the Park City elementary school was there because her son had routinely been arrested for marijuana useage.

The first week we put our daughter in the treatment center, I dug around in her school stuff and found her DARE completion certificate. She had been a peer leader participant in the class and received special recognition for that. I put the certificate up on my fridge, mostly to remind myself that I had been a good mother, that I had taught this girl right from wrong and these were her actions and not because of something I had been remiss in teaching her. This was a situation that I couldn't allow to bludgeon myself with or it literally would have killed me. That certificate is still up on my fridge.

Crap happens. It happens to good people as well as bad. I wish the absolute best for Marie's son and Marie. Perhaps the dancing will help her take her mind off the son's problems. I have no doubt, giving the culture she was raised in and her own public visibility, that she is the one being hardest on herself.

[_BishopRic]

Come on, your reality is raining on our hate parade!

Sorry...carry on.

(Lol)

[_moksha]

I don't like these exhibitions of schadenfreude. So her family has problems. Whose doesn't?

I don't like these exhibitions of Schadenfreude either. Too bad it cannot be replaced with the Christian exhibition of compassion. Speaking of which, I would like to see more of the Buddhist exhibition of Mudita - rejoicing in the happiness of others.

BarrelofMonkeys might even have other types of exhibition on her mind. ;-)

[_barrelomonkeys]

It's disgusting when people find joy in the misery, failure, or shortcomings of others. I think we have some good examples of that in this thread. Nicely done.

I wonder where I see talk of people that sin and scorn for them and their devilish ways? hmm.... would that perhaps be seen from some Saints?

Oh, take the beam out of your eye.

Woop, I almost feel like a Christian. I think I just quoted something almost close to scripture. :D

Some saints are fully aware of their beam. And that doesn't stop them from being fully aware of the lumber yard other people are dealing with.

Are you aware of yours? Why don't we all just start chucking logs at one another?

[_barrelomonkeys]

I don't like these exhibitions of schadenfreude. So her family has problems. Whose doesn't?

I don't like these exhibitions of Schadenfreude either. Too bad it cannot be replaced with the Christian exhibition of compassion. Speaking of which, I would like to see more of the Buddhist exhibition of Mudita - rejoicing in the happiness of others.

BarrelofMonkeys might even have other types of exhibition on her mind. ;-)

huh?

*wide eyed confuzzled wonder*

[_BishopRic]

Hey Bishopric,

Tori's blood is not the only one boiling. My oldest daughter was in a treatment center for about 18 months due to all sorts of things.......a primary factor being the suicide of her 18 year old stake-president's son boyfriend. She decided she didn't want to live anymore and went through overwhelming grief and tried to self destruct using any number of illegal drugs. She was absolutely immune to suggestion from anyone - her parents, her family, her friends, her church leaders and believe you me it was no walk in the park to watch her spiral like she did and feeling helpless to change the situation.

About 120K, hundreds of sleepless nights, and four years later, she is what we consider recovered. She is much more mature than her 19 year old peer counterparts. The suicide happened when she was just short of 16 and it robbed her of any innocence she may have had and completely turned the lives of our family upside down. While she was in treatment, I learned about all of the drugs along this lovely Wasatch Front, and the sheer number of teens in treatment centers (not to mention the number of treatment centers themselves) was staggering. It is something people don't talk about unless they are forced to. Because of idiotic people like on this thread that want to blame parents for the behaviors of the children, the experience is traumatizing, isolating and embarrassing for parents...which actually makes recovery worse. As part of the treatment we had parent therapy sessions wherein a dozen parents or so would sit and discuss how they were feeling. Most of the time the comments were like "How in the world did we end up here?" "What did we do wrong? We taught our child correctly." There were church leaders and civic figures, the principal of the Park City elementary school was there because her son had routinely been arrested for marijuana useage.

The first week we put our daughter in the treatment center, I dug around in her school stuff and found her DARE completion certificate. She had been a peer leader participant in the class and received special recognition for that. I put the certificate up on my fridge, mostly to remind myself that I had been a good mother, that I had taught this girl right from wrong and these were her actions and not because of something I had been remiss in teaching her. This was a situation that I couldn't allow to bludgeon myself with or it literally would have killed me. That certificate is still up on my fridge.

Crap happens. It happens to good people as well as bad. I wish the absolute best for Marie's son and Marie. Perhaps the dancing will help her take her mind off the son's problems. I have no doubt, giving the culture she was raised in and her own public visibility, that she is the one being hardest on herself.

Again...WOW! Talk about a little divergence in the "Father Knows Best" types of families so many try to project! As you so passionately said, "we're" everywhere...and yes, I see a bit of a propensity to try to cover it up in staunchly religious families, but the incidence of addiction is up everywhere!

There are some simple steps we as a society can do to help, but it first takes pulling our heads out of the sand and realize we have a problem -- and open the lines of communication with our kids as much as we can. That means listen, even when we don't want to hear some things they are doing and feeling. When they don't feel like we as parents can relate to them, they turn to friends...and sometimes drugs, which always listen unconditionally.

Anyway, thanks for your post, and I hope things are turning around for your family!

[_karl61]

if deep down you don't know the Church is "true" and you are being talked into accepting callings you don't want and you are giving ten percent of your gross to the church and you find out that Joseph Smith sent Orson Hyde on a mission and then married his wife - well - why wouldn't someone start taking a little extra something - besides - you already have been brought up on faulty logic so the little something extra makes sense.

[_LifeOnaPlate]

It's disgusting when people find joy in the misery, failure, or shortcomings of others. I think we have some good examples of that in this thread. Nicely done.

I wonder where I see talk of people that sin and scorn for them and their devilish ways? hmm.... would that perhaps be seen from some Saints?

Oh, take the beam out of your eye.

Woop, I almost feel like a Christian. I think I just quoted something almost close to scripture. :D

Some saints are fully aware of their beam. And that doesn't stop them from being fully aware of the lumber yard other people are dealing with.

Are you aware of yours? Why don't we all just start chucking logs at one another?

But now you've fallen in the trap, too! All of our beams, bumping into each other!