I have to donate some money to the church....which 'fund' ?

[_skippy the dead]

But what do I know - I've received an iPod as a gift in the past, so apparently that makes me a bad person according to our resident "charity" expert.

With all the suffering in the world, those of us who live in a warm house bigger than we need, drive when we could ride a bike, have one extra pound on our bodies, or have more than one change of clothes, have it all because someone else doesn't have enough to eat or a warm place to sleep.

Think about it. And by the way, Merry Christmas.

That's an overly simplistic view. And if you live in a space larger than, say, 200 sq. feet with your single change of clothes, I don't think you believe it, either.

But Merry Christmas nonetheless to you as well. 'Tis the season, after all.

[_Bond...James Bond]

With all the suffering in the world, those of us who live in a warm house bigger than we need, drive when we could ride a bike, have one extra pound on our bodies, or have more than one change of clothes, have it all because someone else doesn't have enough to eat or a warm place to sleep.

So what? Is this post supposed to make us feel worse for not giving up all our crap to those people who Fate has made poor or is it meant to make you feel better for recognizing the issue (which you'll then ignore just like the rest of us do)?

[_The Nehor]

Your MIL is weird. In lieu of giving you something I'm going to have you give something I give you. In other words I give you nothing but an obligation. That is, in my opinion....a crappy gift. It screams pathetic backhanded attempt to force the LDS church on people. It also screams out to many people that you're giving alms....something you're NOT supposed to do.

Anyways, I'd send her back a card with the 'alms in secret' scripture on it. Then I'd write her name on the giving slip, write "Doofus Fund" under Other and mail it to her Bishop. She'll get some fun questions........ ;)

[_The Nehor]

The church only helps their own or if there is a huge disaster and that is just to show face.

Pirate.

I'm off to bed. Good night all.

:)

So when I helped rebuild someone else's Church, cleaned up after the tornado, and helped build the Children's Advocacy Center (center for abused children) I was helping the Church somehow. Someone should also tell the Service Missionaries that the budget they get to help irrigate land, support orphanages, and feed the starving is somehow getting funneled back into the Church.

[_The Nehor]

With all the suffering in the world, those of us who live in a warm house bigger than we need, drive when we could ride a bike, have one extra pound on our bodies, or have more than one change of clothes, have it all because someone else doesn't have enough to eat or a warm place to sleep.

So what? Is this post supposed to make us feel worse for not giving up all our crap to those people who Fate has made poor or is it meant to make you feel better for recognizing the issue (which you'll then ignore just like the rest of us do)?

Charity, I'm with Bond here. Denying ourselves anything until everyone has what they need is to put our comfort and happiness at the mercy of the worst off person on the planet. This is akin to saying no one can enjoy heaven if anyone is in hell. It puts others into captivity.

[_msnobody]

I'd write really big on the "for" line that it is designated to go to the mall project. Maybe that cancelled check will be a thought starter.

[_harmony]

So the check was made out to you, and given with instructions to give it to the church? Or was the check made out to the church, and sent to you with instructions for you to forward it to the church?

[_Maxrep]

So the check was made out to you, and given with instructions to give it to the church? Or was the check made out to the church, and sent to you with instructions for you to forward it to the church?

The check was made out to us. I re-read the letter and we are supposed to cash the check, then put the money in a tithing envelope and write 'humanitarian fund' on the tithing slip, then give it to the bishop.

Part of the reason I even brought this up is that our young kids don't "quite" get presents from Grandma any more on their birthdays. They receive a savings bond. Okay, they can learn about compound interest at a young age, then cash it ten years later. So now we see that since Grandma has taken the high road and has circumvented all gift giving in my childrens eyes. Yes, I know that the savings bond is a gift, its just tough to see the confusion in a childs eyes when you explain that it is a gift for ten years down the road.

I think what we'll do is wait for next year:

We'll send Grandma a letter; " Enclosed is a check for xxx.xx amount of money. Please cash this check and then buy Bobby a such and such, Mary would like a such and such, and mandy would like a such and such, and Cindy would like a such and such. Wrap these gifts and then give them to your Grandkids in your name. Our kids would like a Christmas present from their Grandma this year".

What do you think?

[_Blixa]

Your idea is perfect Max!!! I think you should do it this year, though. Her "gift" is one of the most twisted things I've ever heard of: its hard to separate all the various strands of self-righteousness, guilt, pride, arrogance, judgementalism, pettiness and cheapness in that gesture.

[_truth dancer]

Hey Maxrep...

OK... how about this.

Since this is really a way for your MIL to donate her money to the church humanitarian fund, (which may or may not go to actual humanitarian causes), and since your MIL doesn't want to give gifts to your children, why not go ahead and give the money to the church in HER NAME. (If you wanted you could let her know that your gift to her this year is donating the money in HER name).

You can just be honest with your children and let them know that Grandma is not giving gifts to them this year because she is donating to other causes, and/or you could just buy a few extra gifts and give them to your children in their Grandmother's name.

:-)

Personally, I with others on this... giving money to someone and telling them to give it to an organization is not a gift at all.

Good luck with this... ;-)

~dancer~