End goal?

[_Scottie]

Well I have been a member since birth. My mother and father died in a car accident while I was attending college which made it hard for me to remain active. I know I was selfish and angry at God. I got married in the temple and recently my wife had twins. I have been much more active since becoming a father. I hope I can contribute. I just want to make sure I do not come off as another angry Mormon. I want to understand why I believe in the church while others do not.

May I ask how long ago your parents passed? I'm very sorry. I can't even imagine the grief you must have gone through/are still going through.

[_John Larsen]

Addressing the anger question:

I really think this is an unfair question because people are generally angry all over the world. Go onto any board on the internet covering any topic, stand around any water cooler, sit in any set of bleachers, or watch TV for a while and you will notice a simple truth: human beings get worked up about all sorts of inconsequential crap.

The is combine with the key element on these sorts of boards: will to participate. You have got to have some motivation to sit down and read and reply to all of this stuff and it take a lot of time and energy. Only people with strong feelings on the issue will get involved. This will look like anger and passion.

John

[_dogmaster]

It has been a while, but it gets to you after having children. As it might be on the corny side, I like the idea of them looking down and seeing their grandkids. My church has given that to me and it makes me happy.

[_Yoda]

Personally, one of my original reasons for reading/posting here was to hear from non-angry Mormons. People who were still LDS, yet didn't spout the black/white judgemental authoritarianism found on apologetic sites.

That's why we get along so well. ;)

[_Runtu]

It has been a while, but it gets to you after having children. As it might be on the corny side, I like the idea of them looking down and seeing their grandkids. My church has given that to me and it makes me happy.

And as others have said, if that works for you, great. :)

I too am sorry for your loss. I know how hard it is to deal with that kind of heartache.

[_Yoda]

It has been a while, but it gets to you after having children. As it might be on the corny side, I like the idea of them looking down and seeing their grandkids. My church has given that to me and it makes me happy.

I understand. I lost my grandparents on both sides, and my best friend, and feel the same way.

[_BishopRic]

Addressing the anger question:

I really think this is an unfair question because people are generally angry all over the world. Go onto any board on the internet covering any topic, stand around any water cooler, sit in any set of bleachers, or watch TV for a while and you will notice a simple truth: human beings get worked up about all sorts of inconsequential crap.

The is combine with the key element on these sorts of boards: will to participate. You have got to have some motivation to sit down and read and reply to all of this stuff and it take a lot of time and energy. Only people with strong feelings on the issue will get involved. This will look like anger and passion.
John

Also, it might be noteworthy that many who have lost people close to them go through interesting phases of mourning, as Kubler-Ross explained. One of those is anger. It doesn't make sense to most of us, but it is common to "get mad" at the loved one for leaving us...also, getting mad at "God" is common for believers. Each personality is different, but some mourners stuff their anger, rather than expressing it. Some learn to suppress feelings, and avoid conflicts, as it reminds them of the tragedy that hasn't been properly grieved.

Bottom line, anger IS healthy to express appropriately and safely. I think these kinds of boards help.

[_Sethbag]

I am a somewhat active member of the church. Someone gave a talk about Mormon message boards. Then this whole topic came up at BYU. It seems strange people are so angry. Why are people so angry? Is there similar feelings from people who leave catholic methodist or even islam? And is there an end goal? Do people here want the church to shut down?

If someone conned you into giving your life savings in an investment scam and you found out you'd been deceived and lost the shirt off your back, do you suppose you'd be angry? Why? Why would you be so angry at having had people take from you under false pretenses? Does that make any sense at all to you?

Obviously I'm asking tongue in cheek, and the analogy isn't perfect because, for the most part, members of the LDS church aren't intentionally deceiving people; they are first themselves deceived, and then pass the deception along to others. But in the end people who realize that the LDS church isn't actually true, that it's just one more of the thousands of man-made churches or religions on this planet, can end up being angered by the fact that their minds had been filled with mythology in the name of history, fiction in the name of fact, etc. for so many years. It's not pleasant to realize that one's previous worldview was an elaborate fabrication.

Ask yourself this. If you grew up a lifelong Jehovah's Witness, missed out on your chance to go to college because they emphasized church service and activity over education, were now stuck in a blue collar job when you'd had the potential for much better, that you'd given half of your life to an organization that you now realized was not only false, but which employed strong psychological and emotional tactics to keep people in line, wouldn't you be somewhat upset about that? Do you think some anger would be understandable?

Now substitute LDS in place of JW and the situation isn't all that different. The analogy isn't perfect, because the two organizations aren't exactly the same, but they're close enough for the purpose of these conversations.

Please tell me why you believe that anger is not understandable in a situation like this?

[_karl61]

Dogmaster: are you from San Diego?

[_Sethbag]

No, but you have to understand that Mormonism is unlike most other religions out there.

In most religions, you belong to the religion. In Mormonism, you ARE a Mormon. It is at the very core of what you are. When you find out it isn't true, it goes much deeper than most religions. People try very hard to hold on to their faith.

Scottie, with all due respect, I disagree with you here. There are a lot of religions that are at the very core of who their members are. Just think Islam. Think Jehovah's Witnesses. Think Hinduism. Think Roman Catholicism for those who actually still believe it, and grow up in faithful households, attend Catholic schools, etc. The LDS church is certainly not alone in representing a deeply immersive way of life for its members, to the point where the church or belief system itself represents a substantial portion of that person's identity.