Does being religious make personal loss easier?

[_Bond...James Bond]

I didn't want to bring personal crap to the board, but this question came to me today as I pondered what happens when people pass on. In my present weak atheist mind I feel bad that there isn't a heaven or whatever for relatives to continue existing in. I took great personal comfort when theist that a person would go on to heaven in the afterlife. So I put hte question up for debate:

Does being religious make personal loss easier?

[_The Nehor]

It's what fills funerals with happy tears instead of sad tears.

[_skippy the dead]

It's what fills funerals with happy tears instead of sad tears.

Happy tears? Please.

[_The Nehor]

It's what fills funerals with happy tears instead of sad tears.

Happy tears? Please.

Well, happened to me last 3 funerals I've been to. That and joking about the person. I could just be a sicko though.

[_Moniker]

I didn't want to bring personal crap to the board, but this question came to me today as I pondered what happens when people pass on. In my present weak atheist mind I feel bad that there isn't a heaven or whatever for relatives to continue existing in. I took great personal comfort when theist that a person would go on to heaven in the afterlife. So I put hte question up for debate:

Does being religious make personal loss easier?

Hi, Bond. I've always assumed that the belief in some sort of afterlife is very reassuring for those with this belief. Of course that's why I've always assumed this belief was incorporated into religious dogma.

Isn't that what it's all about?

[_asbestosman]

That's a tough one. Even the religious will miss those who they are close to.

For some I think religion does help soften the sting of death. Yet, I believe there are other ways. One not so good way is just to deaden your own feelings. I've done that to myself to some degree. I didn't cry when the family dog died even though all my siblings did, and I also liked that dog.

[_Who Knows]

I didn't want to bring personal crap to the board, but this question came to me today as I pondered what happens when people pass on. In my present weak atheist mind I feel bad that there isn't a heaven or whatever for relatives to continue existing in. I took great personal comfort when theist that a person would go on to heaven in the afterlife. So I put hte question up for debate:

Does being religious make personal loss easier?

I've never experienced anything horribly tragic (a death in my immediate family). I've often asked myself whether an experience like that would be easier to overcome were I a firm believer in a god.

I saw a movie recently, can't remember what it was. But the mom was a believer, and the dad was an atheist. And they had a young child who was dieing from cancer or something. And the child asked the dad something like "dad, when I die, will i go to heaven?" You could see the anguish in the dad's eyes, and finally the dad said "yes" (basically going against his atheism to make the child feel more comfortable about death).

It's tough man. I think religion does make personal loss easier. What's the saying - "Ignorance is bliss"?

Oh, I think the movie was 1409 (or something like that).

[_asbestosman]

Hi, Bond. I've always assumed that the belief in some sort of afterlife is very reassuring for those with this belief. Of course that's why I've always assumed this belief was incorporated into religious dogma.

Isn't that what it's all about?

I wonder how that fits into Buddhism where goal is to stop existing as an individual. Actually I'm not sure if the goal is to continue existing at all so much as to break the cycle of rebirth.

[cinepro]

Good question. (The) Mighty Curelom recently posted his relevant thought on this:

I've observed the same behavior in my own family. I've long since given up trying to 'de-convert' them, and at this point I wouldn't even want my parents to leave the church. But years ago I used to mention this or that item of Troublesome Church Trivia, and the response was always the same-- a plug-your-ears, la la la, I-can't-hear-you kind of thing. And anything that got past that defense mechanism encountered another: "You've been reading too much anti-Mormon crap. It's all a bunch of lies."

Interesting stuff, from a psychological perspective. My own interpretation is that Mormons (and most religious people of any denomination) know deep down that it's not true. I mean, if Mormonism was true, the best news you could get is "I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but you've got cancer. You have two months to live." The proper response to this for a true believer is "WHOOPEE! Finally I get to leave this dirty, sinful world and live with God in paradise for eternity." But that's not the response most people have when they find out they're about to die. For most people, such news is terrible, horrifying, debilitating. Even if on an intellectual level you believe your soul will live on, your emotions tell another story. Religion is a form of protection against the reality of death, and people will go to great lengths to maintain that protection. Including, in this case, refusing to investigate their own religion, and deceiving themselves by telling themselves and others that it's because they don't want to pollute their mind with "a bunch of lies."

As for me, I wondered about this when my mother died. But as I thought about her life, and the fact that she was apparently happy and content IN this life, I had nothing but good feelings at her funeral. Regardless of whether or not she exists in a world other than this one, my interactions with her for the most part in this life were beneficial.

[_Runtu]

I have mixed feelings about this. When I was a young man of 23 or so, my two brothers were killed in a car accident. What was weird for me was that my parents and some LDS family friends told me that I needed to be the strong one, that they were leaning on my faith for support. So I felt like I couldn't grieve because I had this religious role to fill.

I suppose religion does comfort people in the idea of an afterlife that is better than this world, but it wasn't all positive for me.