Newest pulpit mandate is highly ironic

[_John Larsen]

Yes, but the deal is with God, not the Church.

Fine. And when God wants his money he can come down and ask me for it;) I actually do agree with you that tithing isn't in the same category as these other financial scams. There is a whole other category of religious scams out there that I am not a fan of. Selling blessings for money. What a crock. But the church isn't the only one raking in tons and tons of money from their members. However, I do think the MLM scams in the church are a big issue and I'm glad the church is continually trying to do something about it. I can't put my finger on what it is within Mormon culture that makes them so susceptible to these scams. Is it Mormonism or is it Utah Mormonism? Is there something about the business culture and economy of Utah that fosters these things?

(You can change these around so nobody feels I am slamming any faith)

There was a Mormon, a Catholic, a Baptist and a Jew talking about how they gave money to God:

Mormon: I give 10% of my gross plus a generous fast offering. YOU SHOULD TOO!

Catholic: I draw a line on the ground. I toss my money in the air. What lands on the left I keep and what lands on the right I give to God.

Baptist: I draw a circle on the ground. I toss my money in the air. What lands in the circle I keep. What lands outside the circle I give to God.

Jew: I toss my money in the air. Whatever God catches he can keep.

I just gave God my routing number. I told Him to take all that he needs. This way, I tithe 100%.

[_Tarski]

That's quite an impressive sales pitch!

Yes, but the deal is with God, not the Church.

How silly! The money goes to the church. They say the deal is with God but they collect the money?
Who could have predicted that people would fall for that?
They basic ploy of the priestly class is that they tell you how to live, they grab power and money and then say it isn't really them at all but an invisible all powerful watcher/punisher.

[Analytics]

How silly! The money goes to the church. They say the deal is with God but they collect the money?
Who could have predicted that people would fall for that?

Whoever wrote the Book of Mormon.

They basic ploy of the priestly class is that they tell you how to live, they grab power and money and then say it isn't really them at all but an invisible all powerful watcher/punisher.

Reminds me of Alma chapter 30 where Korihor comes.
27 And thus ye lead away this people after the foolish traditions of your fathers, and according to your own desires; and ye keep them down, even as it were in bondage, that ye may glut yourselves with the labors of their hands, that they durst not look up with boldness, and that they durst not enjoy their rights and privileges.
28 Yea, they durst not make use of that which is their own lest they should offend their priests, who do yoke them according to their desires, and have brought them to believe, by their traditions and their dreams and their whims and their visions and their pretended mysteries, that they should, if they did not do according to their words, offend some unknown being, who they say is God—a being who never has been seen or known, who never was nor ever will be.

Of course, Korihor recants (I personally think Korihor was a moron--sees angels and yet is an atheist? Brainless as a strawman).

Anyhow, Alma's reply to priests glutting themselves on the labor of others was:
32 Now Alma said unto him: Thou knowest that we do not glut ourselves upon the labors of this people; for behold I have labored even from the commencement of the reign of the judges until now, with mine own hands for my support, notwithstanding my many travels round about the land to declare the word of God unto my people.
33 And notwithstanding the many labors which I have performed in the church, I have never received so much as even one senine for my labor; neither has any of my brethren, save it were in the judgment-seat; and then we have received only according to law for our time.

LDS bishops, stake presidents, and most others do not get paid for their labors in the church.

Those who currently end up getting paid were once lowly unpaid clergy too. I doubt they'd rise without believing and hence doubt they do it for the money nor that they glut themselves upon our labor. I think there are a few things that may be a bit unfair--like why should they get better health-care than other faithful members? Just saying.

[_The Nehor]

Yes, but the deal is with God, not the Church.

Fine. And when God wants his money he can come down and ask me for it;) I actually do agree with you that tithing isn't in the same category as these other financial scams. There is a whole other category of religious scams out there that I am not a fan of. Selling blessings for money. What a crock. But the church isn't the only one raking in tons and tons of money from their members. However, I do think the MLM scams in the church are a big issue and I'm glad the church is continually trying to do something about it. I can't put my finger on what it is within Mormon culture that makes them so susceptible to these scams. Is it Mormonism or is it Utah Mormonism? Is there something about the business culture and economy of Utah that fosters these things?

(You can change these around so nobody feels I am slamming any faith)

There was a Mormon, a Catholic, a Baptist and a Jew talking about how they gave money to God:

Mormon: I give 10% of my gross plus a generous fast offering. YOU SHOULD TOO!

Catholic: I draw a line on the ground. I toss my money in the air. What lands on the left I keep and what lands on the right I give to God.

Baptist: I draw a circle on the ground. I toss my money in the air. What lands in the circle I keep. What lands outside the circle I give to God.

Jew: I toss my money in the air. Whatever God catches he can keep.

I just gave God my routing number. I told Him to take all that he needs. This way, I tithe 100%.

Oh, he can and will. He did also give you orders to give a tenth of all you have voluntarily. If he needs more, he already knows how to get it.

Why not post your routing number here? That way we'll all know you are serious. If money starts vanishing, remember that it's God taking it and not some crazed identity thief.

[_The Nehor]

I want net blessings so that I don't have to pay taxes on them.

Nazi-mo's don't like that philosophy.

Well, Jesus did tell the people to render to Caesar before they render unto God. At least the phrasing makes it sound that way. I pay net. I talked it over with God and got an okay. If he wants me to switch he knows how to contact me.

[_John Larsen]

Yes, but the deal is with God, not the Church.

Fine. And when God wants his money he can come down and ask me for it;) I actually do agree with you that tithing isn't in the same category as these other financial scams. There is a whole other category of religious scams out there that I am not a fan of. Selling blessings for money. What a crock. But the church isn't the only one raking in tons and tons of money from their members. However, I do think the MLM scams in the church are a big issue and I'm glad the church is continually trying to do something about it. I can't put my finger on what it is within Mormon culture that makes them so susceptible to these scams. Is it Mormonism or is it Utah Mormonism? Is there something about the business culture and economy of Utah that fosters these things?

(You can change these around so nobody feels I am slamming any faith)

There was a Mormon, a Catholic, a Baptist and a Jew talking about how they gave money to God:

Mormon: I give 10% of my gross plus a generous fast offering. YOU SHOULD TOO!

Catholic: I draw a line on the ground. I toss my money in the air. What lands on the left I keep and what lands on the right I give to God.

Baptist: I draw a circle on the ground. I toss my money in the air. What lands in the circle I keep. What lands outside the circle I give to God.

Jew: I toss my money in the air. Whatever God catches he can keep.

I just gave God my routing number. I told Him to take all that he needs. This way, I tithe 100%.

Oh, he can and will. He did also give you orders to give a tenth of all you have voluntarily. If he needs more, he already knows how to get it.

Why not post your routing number here? That way we'll all know you are serious. If money starts vanishing, remember that it's God taking it and not some crazed identity thief.

Because Satan's minions lurk here and everyone knows the Devil loves money.

I don't remember God telling me to give a tenth of all I have. Could you refresh my memory?

[_The Nehor]

Because Satan's minions lurk here and everyone knows the Devil loves money.

I don't remember God telling me to give a tenth of all I have. Could you refresh my memory?

It was in that 'Standard Works' thing us LDS keep blathering on about.

[Guest]

I want net blessings so that I don't have to pay taxes on them.

Nazi-mo's don't like that philosophy.

I did the calculations on the Net Present Value of God's blessing. It turns out that keeping the 10% will get you out ahead. The only down side is the possibility of curses. However, God seems to only want to curse impoverished children in the third world, so I am pretty safe on that front.

[_John Larsen]

Because Satan's minions lurk here and everyone knows the Devil loves money.

I don't remember God telling me to give a tenth of all I have. Could you refresh my memory?

It was in that 'Standard Works' thing us LDS keep blathering on about.

Really? Where?

[_The Nehor]

I want net blessings so that I don't have to pay taxes on them.

Nazi-mo's don't like that philosophy.

I did the calculations on the Net Present Value of God's blessing. It turns out that keeping the 10% will get you out ahead. The only down side is the possibility of curses. However, God seems to only want to curse impoverished children in the third world, so I am pretty safe on that front.

I don't know about that. He led me to my current job where I'm making about 20% more than I should have realistically expected to make and where non-tax deductible work expenses were pushed down. I think I came out ahead in this deal.