antishock8 wrote:Cinepro,
You've made this patently clear that this isn't about your kid. This issue is about you and your spouse. I'm not sure why you can't follow your conscience, and I'm not sure why you don't feel like you can put your son's wishes ahead of everyone else's in this case, but it's something that you're obviously trying to work out here.
I'm not sure how you see this as being between me and my wife. I do not appreciate her being brought into this as a villain. This is not about her. I choose to go to Church. I enjoy going to Church. I am happier going to Church than staying home. It may not seem logical, and it may be the result of 30 years of evil brainwashing by the Morg, but I don't think so. My conscience tells me to keep going to Church.
I'm not putting my son's wishes ahead of everyone else's because he's 10. When our family goes on vacations and outings together, he is forced to attend, even if he doesn't want to go to the zoo or the park. When our family goes to Church, he will attend with us as well.
I'll reiterate that it's pretty s****y to force your kid to attend a church he doesn't like, nor believes. It's a cruel ruse that you continue to mask your disbelief. It's a sham of a relationship if you have to abide by her religious edicts in order to maintain harmony. Lies and deceit are the seeds that have been sown in your family on every level. This is the truth. Listen to yourself. Listen to your son. Think about these things. These are very important and fundamental issues in both your lives. Self-deception is no good...
I don't have a problem making my kids do something they don't like (the necessity and benefits of which have been well covered in this thread). The more interesting question is what to do when he doesn't believe. Regardless of my belief (or lack thereof), I don't see Church non-attendance as some ideal to be attained. The day may come when I stop attending, but it isn't something I think about, or hope for. I don't believe the Church is evil; if anything, my lack of belief makes me more tolerant for the well-intended mistakes of the leaders. And I feel like I am making a real, valid contribution to the lives of the kids in the Cub Scout program. I know there are non-LDS packs that would love to have me, but I don't need to leave the Church to find something I already have.
Honestly, for all my doubts and disbeliefs, the most likely thing to get me to stop attending would be social reasons, or if they stopped laughing at my jokes in EQ (and, based on the reception of some of my jokes over at MADB, that could very well happen).
Perhaps I should clarify why I started this thread. I didn't do it as a poll, where the outcome would be decided by group vote. I did it mainly out of appreciation for the irony of the situation (especially ironic for those who have known me for years). I did it because I thought others might find it interesting. I did it to see what different ideas people might have, and how others may have approached similar situations. For example, I hadn't really thought about the ramifications of my son's participation in the ward when he turns 12 next year, so now I have a while to think and prepare (and prepare the Bishop and YM leaders if needed). That will be important. There may be other things I haven't considered that will come to mind.
But for now, we'll keep going. Especially since I've got some great LGT jokes for this week's Gospel Doctrine class :).