Time out is a punishment. The purpose of the punishment is to encourage corrective action through the threat of it happening again.
Explain how you think Time out is punishment.
No child (well, at least not many) actively seek the state of time out. Generally it denies them something that they want, whether that's toys, companionship of siblings or parents, the TV, etc. I would define such a state as a punishment.
I see, so what you're saying is that anything that denies a child what they want, is punishment.
Is that what you're saying?
Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up.
Chinese Proverb
Time out is a punishment. The purpose of the punishment is to encourage corrective action through the threat of it happening again.
Explain how you think Time out is punishment.
No child (well, at least not many) actively seek the state of time out. Generally it denies them something that they want, whether that's toys, companionship of siblings or parents, the TV, etc. I would define such a state as a punishment.
I see, so what you're saying is that anything that denies a child what they want, is punishment.
Is that what you're saying?
Not entirely. I would say denying them something they normally have is a punishment. If a child wanted (to use an extreme example) a beer, I would not consider it punishment if it was denied to them. I would also add the proviso that the denial is in response to behavior on the child's part. If the child doesn't get to go to the park one because they threw a tantrum this is punishment. If they don't go because their need to go to the hospital because the child's grandfather had a heart attack, not a punishment.
"Surely he knows that DCP, The Nehor, Lamanite, and other key apologists..." -Scratch clarifying my status in apologetics "I admit it; I'm a petty, petty man." -Some Schmo
this is how California see's it as to children but you can apply it to adults too:
welfare and institution code section 300: subdivision c
(c) The child is suffering serious emotional damage, or is at substantial risk of suffering serious emotional damage, evidenced by severe anxiety, depression, withdrawal, or untoward aggressive behavior toward self or others, as a result of the conduct of the parent or guardian or who has no parent or guardian capable of providing appropriate care. No child shall be found to be a person described by this subdivision if the willful failure of the parent or guardian to provide adequate mental health treatment is based on a sincerely held religious belief and if a less intrusive judicial intervention is available.
In response to your bolded comment, I would call it denying the child what is not in their best interest.
I agree with you that the punishments I listed are consequences but I believe they are also punishments. It could also be called a penalty or any number of other things.
I like the definition of abuse Tumult supplied.
"Surely he knows that DCP, The Nehor, Lamanite, and other key apologists..." -Scratch clarifying my status in apologetics "I admit it; I'm a petty, petty man." -Some Schmo
Emotional abuse is making someone else feel like crap just cause you can. Make them question their worth, their own merit, their ability to succeed -- it is often times a slow process that is full of criticisms, ridicule, humiliation, limit access to outsiders -- isolation, destruction of things that were important to the one being abused occurs too, at times. The verbal abuse and isolation can make the victim feel dependent upon the abuser and completely powerless. The abuser will work to instill new behavior into the victim as to avoid the wrath of scorn. I learned that long term emotional and verbal abuse often times (in these times) will cause the victim to retreat to the internet for support and help. I was unfortunate enough to be on this board when that occurred. There were some real damned assholes here -- not much better than my husband, actually. Of course being told by people pretty much the same crap my husband said -- I was stupid, I was a slut, they couldn't "deal with my past", or made comments about "people like me" was quite upsetting, at times. Of course my bad for dealing with a bunch of pigs that left the LDS Church and didn't leave their ridiculous notions of women and sexuality back with them at the Church doors. :)
The talk of time out is not appropriate for emotional abuse, really. Apples and oranges. Placing a child in time out and telling them they're a worthless, stupid, child is quite different then explaining consequences of behavior and using negative reinforcement. I prefer to use positive reinforcements with my children. You must ask yourself if you keep placing your kid in time out or spanking them and the behavior doesn't stop if it's actually a productive thing to do? It's not if the behavior continues.
There are some great tools on the internet to help teach positive reinforcements -- you can make behavior plans and actually graph progress. Rewards for good behavior is more successful, generally than taking something away from a child. Gradually you decrease the rewards and praise the child verbally -- eventually it should be internalized where they are praising themselves for positive behavior.
I would agree with you Moniker that positive reinforcement is generally more effective but I think a blend of the two works best. This is of course my idiotic non-parental self speaking so I'll report back once I actually have kids as to whether it worked. :)
"Surely he knows that DCP, The Nehor, Lamanite, and other key apologists..." -Scratch clarifying my status in apologetics "I admit it; I'm a petty, petty man." -Some Schmo
The Nehor wrote:I would agree with you Moniker that positive reinforcement is generally more effective but I think a blend of the two works best. This is of course my idiotic non-parental self speaking so I'll report back once I actually have kids as to whether it worked. :)
I work with kids with severe behavioral disorders -- it works. :)
The Nehor wrote:In response to your bolded comment, I would call it denying the child what is not in their best interest.
I agree with you that the punishments I listed are consequences but I believe they are also punishments. It could also be called a penalty or any number of other things.
I like the definition of abuse Tumult supplied.
Why do parents put their children in "time out"? What circumstances would lead to that?
Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up.
Chinese Proverb
The Nehor wrote:In response to your bolded comment, I would call it denying the child what is not in their best interest.
I agree with you that the punishments I listed are consequences but I believe they are also punishments. It could also be called a penalty or any number of other things.
I like the definition of abuse Tumult supplied.
Why do parents put their children in "time out"? What circumstances would lead to that?
anything where they need to cool down in a place they know they go when they have done something disagreeable.
And crawling on the planet's face Some insects called the human race Lost in time And lost in space...and meaning