Ex-Mormons are dissatisfied and happy.

[_LDS Missionary]

http://www.whymormons.net/2008/06/lds-c ... ction.html

This was inspired by Chapter 27 of the this year's Joseph Smith lesson manual. 'Beware the bitter fruits of Apostasy'.

Except those fruits are actually quite sweet, juicy, and delicious. Always ripe.

It may surprise Mormons to know that ex-Mormons enjoyed happiness in the LDS church. What will shock Mormons to know, is that happiness also followed us out of the LDS church. And we're still good people.

[_The Nehor]

I'm shocked. I assumed all ex-mormons received the curse of Cain and turned into vampires and then spend their time sucking the blood out of adorable puppies and orphans to propagate their horrible curse.

[_Some Schmo]

I'm shocked. I assumed all ex-mormons received the curse of Cain and turned into vampires and then spend their time sucking the blood out of adorable puppies and orphans to propagate their horrible curse.

Is that what the Mormons are teaching these days? Why am I not surprised?

So I guess all vampires are black, then?

[_The Nehor]

Is that what the Mormons are teaching these days? Why am I not surprised?

So I guess all vampires are black, then?

Only the token black ones.

[_Some Schmo]

Is that what the Mormons are teaching these days? Why am I not surprised?

So I guess all vampires are black, then?

Only the token black ones.

I see. I think white people suck too.

[_The Nehor]

Is that what the Mormons are teaching these days? Why am I not surprised?

So I guess all vampires are black, then?

Only the token black ones.

I see. I think white people suck too.

The vampires more literally then the rest but I agree.

[_Infymus]

I'm shocked. I assumed all ex-mormons received the curse of Cain and turned into vampires and then spend their time sucking the blood out of adorable puppies and orphans to propagate their horrible curse.

Only the homo erotic ones.

[_Doctor Steuss]

I'm not surprised that ex-Mormons are happy. Happiness can be found by being former crappy members and liking to sin a lot.

[_krose]

I'm shocked. I assumed all ex-mormons received the curse of Cain and turned into vampires and then spend their time sucking the blood out of adorable puppies and orphans to propagate their horrible curse.

Is that what the Mormons are teaching these days? Why am I not surprised?

So I guess all vampires are black, then?

Well, one of the most entertaining vampires in Buffy was black (Mr. Trick, who organized "SlayerFest 98").

[_The Nehor]

I'm shocked. I assumed all ex-mormons received the curse of Cain and turned into vampires and then spend their time sucking the blood out of adorable puppies and orphans to propagate their horrible curse.

Is that what the Mormons are teaching these days? Why am I not surprised?

So I guess all vampires are black, then?

Well, one of the most entertaining vampires in Buffy was black (Mr. Trick, who organized "SlayerFest 98").

Yeah, I was pretty ticked when they dusted him. He didn't even get a very good death scene. More of a throwaway death. He did have one of the best lines, "If we don't do something, the Master could get killed. Well, our prayers are with him."