Ray A wrote:Polygamy is something that has always bugged me. Why, I know not. Maybe it just didn't seem "right" for a Christian religion. I was brought up in Catholicism, but by no means was I fanatical. Mormonism was in a sense an extension of my Catholicism, so the idea of polygamy was totally foreign to me. That was an aberration from Old Testament times, a "primative" early form of Judaism which was refined by Jesus, who in my opinion taught monogamy. If I was ever going to go the whole way, I thought, it would be by following the gospels, not Moses or Abraham. The first impression I got of Mormon polygamy was a couple of months after I was baptised. A missionary mentioned after a stake conference that Joseph Smith once "tested" Heber C. Kimball by asking him for his wife. I was nearly floored. "Yes", he said, "but it was only a test". That brought some relief, but it still seemed awkward. Completely oblivious to the whole story, what the missionary told me still stuck in my mind, but I "shelved" it.
When my wife and I went to the New Zealand temple in 1978 to be "sealed", I realised by that time that there was a connection between D&C 132 and "eternal marriage"/polygamy, so I asked the temple president if polygamy was "necessary" in the long term. No, he said, we could chose whether or not we wanted more wives, or could remain with just one. I thought I'd opt for just one, if I was going to stay with the Church. As my knowledge of 19th century polygamy grew over the years, it disturbed me more and more. It just didn't seem "Christian", and it ruffled my belief to some extent, and was one of the main points that initially made me unsteady in the Church, very early on. I told this to an older sister, and very good friend of mine, and she was almost flippant. She thought polygamy was a okay. That didn't help, and I felt kind of "out of it". The Book of Mormon didn't seem to support it either, but there was that conflict with D&C 132.
Mormon Enigma and Van Wagoner's Mormon Polygamy: A History, certainly set me straight. And then Quinn's Dialogue article on LDS plural marriages post-Manifesto. Problems with Book of Mormon anachronisms had not even entered my mind in those years, and I still believed the Book of Mormon to be historical. Then I became aware of the Witnesses dissenting because of polygamy, especially Whitmer's An Address To All Believers in Christ. Joseph, wrote Whitmer, had "fallen" like King David. He succumbed to temptation, and took many wives. I was relieved to know that Whitmer felt this way, but he was an "apostate". He rejected the D&C in toto, which in my opinion was a vital part of Mormonism, or if you were going to remain a Mormon.
Fast foward to 1990. An elderly missionary couple is trying to reactivate me, so I asked them if they were aware of Joseph's polygamy, and that he sometimes took other men's wives as his own. The Elder slammed his hand on the dining room table, "don't be ridiculous, if he did that he could not be a prophet". We nevertheless remained good friends, and later he send me copy of Richard Poll's Reflections of a Mormon Historian, a sort of way to deal with "cog.diss".
I don't believe the answer is to "force" people to accept polygamy. My answer may be even more radical: Dump D&C 132 from the LDS canon, and admit it was a mistake. Joseph had indeed gone astray, as Whitmer suggested. Regardless of what apologists say, the Book of Mormon and D&C 132 are in direct and unavoidable conflict, but the Book of Mormon is the "Keystone" of Mormonism, not the D&C.
Hi Ray...
Nice post. :-)
My father is agnostic (and a truly remarkable man), my mother (she was also incredible), joined the LDS church a few years after I. The teachings in my home growing had nothing to do with Christianity but everything to do with honesty, integrity, and decency. In my home, adultery (men cheating on their wives, men taking multiple women, having an affair, men having a harem, men having a mistress, plural marriage, polygamy, whatever you want to call it), was absolutely so wrong that there is no way in Heaven it could be considered something holy or decent. It was just flat out wrong. I was taught that no decent man would EVER cheat (or openly engage in sex with other women) on his wife, or screw girls. I mean it had nothing to do with God but it was about what was a decent human being and what makes for a good marriage and relationship.
I was completely utterly absolutely SHOCKED out of my mind when I discovered polygamy was embraced and taught in the church as a divine principle. Stupid me for not reading up prior to baptism. (sigh).
When I heard from my non-LDS class mates that Joseph Smith was a polygamist, and asked my local leaders, I was told that many single women sealed themselves to Joseph Smith after he died so they could receive exaltation. (Weird but, whatever).
STUPID me for believing these men who claimed divine inspiration and who had been life long members of the church. I should have walked to the nearest library (I was twelve) and checked out some rare books on Mormonism. Oh wait, they didn't have even one book on Mormonism in my community library. I guess I should have known that there were books somewhere in Utah with information about Joseph Smith and his sexual relationships with girls nearly my age, but alas I was too stupid to consider a prophet of god would act in such a dispicable way.
My point is, even without Christianity I think there is something in many human beings that recognize the harem lifestyle along with its inequality is unhealthy, primitive, animalistic, and completely degrading to women.
~td~