Wheat wrote:From what I have observed in my years of following Mormon-related message boards, you have been a *double-minded man*, to use the words of James. My first recollection is of you as a defender of the faith, including the Book of Mormon, if I recall correctly. Then you went hog wild to the other side. Then you bounced back again and started being somewhat of an apologist again. Now the pendulum has swung strongly back to the *anti* side of the question, at least in many ways.
Your observations haven't been particularly strong. Your first recollection is wrong. I never defended the faith on ZLMB, and maybe you'd like to consult DCP on that one (I'll even provide the thread concerned if you want, and you can judge whether I was a defender). I think we both agree that this unpleasant episode is now "history". And speaking of history, I never defended the Book of Mormon as history on ZLMB. In my one-on-one debate with Ben Mc Guire, about the Book of Mormon, he tried to convince me it is history, unsuccessfully. Maybe you missed that. My initial intention in going on Z. was to have "reasonable" convsersations about Mormonism, but I soon discovered that there was "no middle ground", and people like you epitomise that. The bombs started flying when I was critical of Anne Perry, a Mormon fiction writer, and Pahoran ignited the fireworks. From that point on I realised that any form of criticism was unwelcome, and I turned against the defenders. (Gad might also like to remind you of that infamous email I sent the Z. moderators.)
When I later went on FAIR, my entrance was greeted with great caution, and the mods had me tagged. I was warned from the start not to cross boundaries, which I did once when I suggested that Joseph Smith might have had a masturbation problem. Yes, it is true that I came to like Mormons very much during my 5,000 posts on FAIR, but generally I was considered a "loyal critic", I think. I defended Mormons when I felt they were under unjustified attack, and yes, I was often an ass, and a bit extreme. My presence on FAIR was seen differently by different people. Some considered me a critic, others a defender, but the truth is I was somewhere in the middle, sometimes critic, sometimes defender, depending on the issue being debated, and where I stood on that issue. Something wrong with that? Or should I just be a one-song drone like you?
Over a year ago I deleted my account on MADB (formerly FAIR), and told Jan Anderson, with whom I had fairly frequent email correspondence, that I could no longer "gag myself". I was restraining myself so as not to offend Mormons, so I did what I've always encouraged others to do - if you don't like the place, leave it. So I left.
Now, if you want more details to get a proper understanding of my history, I can oblige, but it may involve going into areas that some may not like.
What is really "sad", is that it seems almost illegal to voice genuine criticism. It's like you've denied the Holy Ghost, or something. And if you express positive feelings for Mormons/Mormonism, they automatically think you're on your way back to the Church, or encourage you to come back. It's never going to happen, and this is precisely what I told DCP when he visited me, and also told him what I found impossible to accept in Mormonism, such as plural marriage, and that my concept of NDEs told me a very different picture from what I was seeing in LDS doctrine. I took the "Journey of Faith" DVD out of politeness, but it had no effect on me, and didn't change my opinion of the Book of Mormon, but I did enjoy watching all the LDS scholars I'd read in the past.
This is what some of you people have to get out of your thick heads - I will will never be returning to Mormonism. And even if I did in very old age, perhaps, it would be for social or community purposes. Don't think, as some of you have in the past, that you're going to "win" me over again.