The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.

[_Gadianton Plumber]

Ahab:

If a "Prophet" is ever wrong, then he isn't acting as a prophet/Prophet, so you are okay then.

http://www.mormonapologetics.org/topic/ ... 1208863823

[_Runtu]

"The last time I saw stats (and it's been a while) children in interfaith marriages didn't choose religion at all let alone pick one. If your parents don't think it is important enough to back one religion then obviously neither one really matters." ~ Juliann, 6/6/2010

So, the only way I can communicate to my daughter that my religion matters is to stop bringing her to church with me and allow her to be raised exclusively in the LDS church.

Makes perfect sense.

I'm pretty sure Juliann stole this from Dr. Laura, who frowns on interfaith marriages.

[_Darth J]

There are so many, but I really enjoy Wade "We're Not a Cult" Englund's opening post in the thread he started, "Great Relief for the "Ark-Steadiers." This post just so perfectly captures the mindset of "our job is to do as we're told."

There seems to be not a few good and faithful members who have been troubled by the policies and practice of the Church and its leaders (both past and present), and this to the point where these members, in their position of relative ignorance and lack of authority, have felt themselves in a position to counsel and criticize both God and the bretheren. And, when things don't seem to go as they believe they ought, and even when things do eventually come around to their way of thinking, they may become disgruntled and even loose faith.

The wonderful news is, there is relief for these good and faithful members. God, in his infinite wisdom and love, has put his perfect Son in charge of the Church, and his Son has establish his kingdom on earth, where admittedly fallible leaders are called by revelation and inspiration, and where each member is given their own respective stewartships and responsibilities and accountabilities. In short, God has established order and lines of communication and authority.

What this means is, when the Church leaders sets forth a practice, then all of the why's and wherefore's are really between them and God. They are to answer to God and not to us, for what they do in their callings. Since it isn't our responsibility, we can be greatly relieved to know that we don't need to capreciously make their business our business, or steady the ark of their stewrtship. We can unburden ourselves from the unwarranted responsibility of usurping their authority, and can be relieved to know that we can swallow our pride, trust in God, and concern ourselves with minding our own business. In fact, it is preferred, and works bests for all parties, when we do mind our own business--which entails striving to grow ourselves towards becoming like Christ, and to assist others within our stewartship to do likewise.

So, ye who have been heavily ladened by wrongfully taking upon you God's and the Church leader's business, lay it all at Christ's feet. Let him make your burden easy and your yoke light. Trouble yourself no longer with things that don't concern you. Rest your mind instead simply on what you have been called and are intended to do.

And high five to Selek in the same thread for cogently describing the tribalism, hyper-defensiveness, and persecution complex that we all know and love.

Those who wish to attack the true Church of Jesus Christ will find (or invent) reasons to do so- no matter how many you take away.

Throwing our earlier leaders and beliefs to the wolves in the hopes that they'll suddenly like us is futile, intellectually dishonest, and morally indefensible.

Appeasement is the way of the coward- the Danes knew it, as should any reasonably serious student of history.

"Once you have paid the Danegeld, you're never rid of the Dane."

Someone who is willing to belittle the Church in order to win a pat on the head from the rabid apostates, or to throw the Church under the bus to win the fawning approval of Babylon will be willing to surrender much more if the stakes are higher.

We used to call such people "collaborators" and "Quislings"- now they presume to lecture us about propriety and being "open-minded" and "true Christians".

Surrendering one's principles, one's dignity, and licking the boots of tools, pawns, and sons of Perdition is NOT how one "endures to the end".

[_Some Schmo]

Trouble yourself no longer with things that don't concern you.

How can something not concern you and trouble you at the same time?

That's kind of like saying, "Stop reading illegible stuff."

[_cinepro]

In a discussion on the priesthood ban, someone asked what the "pros" were for the Church in having the ban.

Here's what Avatar4321 came up with:

When you take out the emotional sentiment of the issues, there are a number of pro issues.

1) It prevented the Church from segregating in a time in America where Racism and segregation was rampant.

2) It kept the Church from doing intensive missionary work in many areas of Africa where Missionaries were seen as political pawns of colonialism and oppression. Allowing the Church to enter a generation after all the colonial upheavel when sentiments were more condusive for the growth of the Church there.

3) It tested the faith of all the members of the Church.

[_Sethbag]

Shouldn't Avatar have said it prevented the church from desegregating? I don't get her point if she really meant segregating, because the church was "prevented" from segregating only by scaring off all the blacks so that segregation vs. desegregation wasn't even really a question.

I can't think of specific quotes offhand, but if I could nominate anyone I'd say just about anything ever written on MAD by Hammer.

I would love to see Hammer and Nightlion go at it in a battle of wits and revelation. We could set it up with bleachers on one side for the audience, and they would stand on a sort of long narrow strip like what fencers stand on during competition, and they would prophecy and utter revelation, and condemnation, and righteous judgment at each other until one of them buckles and we find out which of them really has God on their side, if any.

[_MsJack]

Avatar4321 is a man.

[_bcspace]

bcspace:

“I believe resurrected people… will be fully functional with regards to sex.”

“I just can’t see us standing around [in Heaven] doing nothing all day but playing the harp and eating at the buffet while never getting fat.”

“How is Christ historical if the Book of Mormon is allegorical or fraudulant?”

“God does justify killing others.”

“Ours is the only Christian doctrine that makes any Biblical sense.”

“True Christianity (LDS) will have it’s ups and downs but will survive as it has never been one of control or beholden to dogma that conflicts with science.”

“Liberals, socialists, marxist, feminists, homosexuals, pedophiles, Fatah, Hamas, Hizbollah, Al Qaida, antiMormons, Carter, Clinton, Johnson etc…”

“Ding dong the witch [Senator Ted Kennedy] is dead!”

“Of course now I’m free to teach that homosexuals are not normal healthy people without any opposition.”

There are just too many.

Sa-weet! Good quotes those, especially if you know the context. Thanks!

[_Some Schmo]

bcspace:

“I believe resurrected people… will be fully functional with regards to sex.”

“I just can’t see us standing around [in Heaven] doing nothing all day but playing the harp and eating at the buffet while never getting fat.”

“How is Christ historical if the Book of Mormon is allegorical or fraudulant?”

“God does justify killing others.”

“Ours is the only Christian doctrine that makes any Biblical sense.”

“True Christianity (LDS) will have it’s ups and downs but will survive as it has never been one of control or beholden to dogma that conflicts with science.”

“Liberals, socialists, marxist, feminists, homosexuals, pedophiles, Fatah, Hamas, Hizbollah, Al Qaida, antiMormons, Carter, Clinton, Johnson etc…”

“Ding dong the witch [Senator Ted Kennedy] is dead!”

“Of course now I’m free to teach that homosexuals are not normal healthy people without any opposition.”

There are just too many.

Sa-weet! Good quotes those, especially if you know the context. Thanks!

I think it's pretty funny you think context would save any one of those quotes, unless the context was that they were preceded by the phrase, "Wouldn't it be ludicrous if I actually believed..."

[_bcspace]

I think it's pretty funny you think context would save any one of those quotes,

I don't think they need saving. Notice that I didn't say they needed the context, only that they would be better within such context. There is nothing about those quotes by themselves to be embarrassed about.