I'm going to church tomorrow!

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_Rambo
_Emeritus
Posts: 1933
Joined: Thu Feb 18, 2010 6:43 am

I'm going to church tomorrow!

Post by _Rambo »

I'm on vacation with family and we are all going to church tomorrow. I haven't been in about 8 months so it should be interesting. What do u guys do if u have to go to church? Any fun suggestions?
_Calculus Crusader
_Emeritus
Posts: 1495
Joined: Sun Jan 28, 2007 5:52 am

Re: I'm going to church tomorrow!

Post by _Calculus Crusader »

Rambo wrote:I'm on vacation with family and we are all going to church tomorrow. I haven't been in about 8 months so it should be interesting. What do u guys do if u have to go to church? Any fun suggestions?



Bring earplugs and a kindle
Caeli enarrant gloriam Dei

(I lost access to my Milesius account, so I had to retrieve this one from the mothballs.)
_keithb
_Emeritus
Posts: 607
Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2011 4:09 am

Re: I'm going to church tomorrow!

Post by _keithb »

Rambo wrote:I'm on vacation with family and we are all going to church tomorrow. I haven't been in about 8 months so it should be interesting. What do u guys do if u have to go to church? Any fun suggestions?


Too bad it's not testimony meeting. You could just go to the pulpit and start fake crying before you even started your testimony (eye drops will help) and start gushing over your love for your family, GBH, JC, Joseph Smith, and the gang. The funniest would be if you deliberately made it completely incomprehensible after the first sentence and continually snorted loudly into the mic the whole time you were speaking.

Short of that, you could just start marking the back of the program every time one of the speakers teaches a doctrine that contradicts either logic, the Mormon canon of scriptures, or common decency towards others and see how many marks you get by the end of church.
"Joseph Smith was called as a prophet, dumb-dumb-dumb-dumb-dumb" -South Park
_Dr. Shades
_Emeritus
Posts: 14117
Joined: Mon Oct 23, 2006 9:07 pm

Re: I'm going to church tomorrow!

Post by _Dr. Shades »

Rambo wrote:Any fun suggestions?

Yes. Type the following into Notepad or Microsoft Word:

http://www.mormondiscussions.com/phpBB3

. . . and then copy and paste it several times. Once you're done doing that, print the page, then use scissors to cut them out.

Bring that printed stack of URLs, then place them between random pages in the hymnbooks or in tithing envelopes.
"Finally, for your rather strange idea that miracles are somehow linked to the amount of gay sexual gratification that is taking place would require that primitive Christianity was launched by gay sex, would it not?"

--Louis Midgley
_Rambo
_Emeritus
Posts: 1933
Joined: Thu Feb 18, 2010 6:43 am

Re: I'm going to church tomorrow!

Post by _Rambo »

Haha Shades, maybe I will do that sometime. Have you ever done it? I see you are living up to your sig line :)
_Wisdom Seeker
_Emeritus
Posts: 991
Joined: Fri Aug 27, 2010 3:55 am

Re: I'm going to church tomorrow!

Post by _Wisdom Seeker »

It's always nice to have a smart-phone at church. If not, find a Sudoku or other puzzle to keep you occupied.
_Inconceivable
_Emeritus
Posts: 3405
Joined: Mon Dec 04, 2006 5:44 am

Re: I'm going to church tomorrow!

Post by _Inconceivable »

Rambo wrote:Any fun suggestions?


Fart real loud and then look directly at the person behind you in utter disgust.

Sing the hymns like Andrea Boccelli (or if you're talented, Donald Duck)

Bring a bag of cherios and share it with the urchins crawling around you on the floor.

Paint eyes on your eyelids and take a nap.

Steal a couple phones, plant one in the organ and call it from the other about 10 times.

Tip the deacon passing the sacrament, or put a donation on the bread tray.

Applaud after the special musical number and ignite your lighter in approval.

Bring a coloring book, but use watercolors.

Wear a Ladmo tie (oh. this is a T-shirt with a tie printed on it).

It never hurts to help. Make it a memorable journal experience.

inc.
_Ceeboo
_Emeritus
Posts: 7625
Joined: Sun Feb 14, 2010 1:58 am

Re: I'm going to church tomorrow!

Post by _Ceeboo »

Inconceivable wrote:
Applaud after the special musical number and ignite your lighter in approval.




LOL!


Peace,
Ceeboo
_Yoda

Re: I'm going to church tomorrow!

Post by _Yoda »

Calculus Crusader wrote:
Rambo wrote:I'm on vacation with family and we are all going to church tomorrow. I haven't been in about 8 months so it should be interesting. What do u guys do if u have to go to church? Any fun suggestions?



Bring earplugs and a kindle

Or an iPad!
_hobo1512
_Emeritus
Posts: 888
Joined: Sat Jul 10, 2010 5:27 pm

Re: I'm going to church tomorrow!

Post by _hobo1512 »

Ceeboo wrote:
Inconceivable wrote:
Applaud after the special musical number and ignite your lighter in approval.




LOL!


Peace,
Ceeboo

Ask if they take requests.
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