Memorial Day

[_1 Iron]

Today in church, a talk was given about drawing closer to our ancestors in our hearts and minds. It was tied to tomorrow's holiday and it got me thinking.

Backstory: I grew up in Utah, and memorial day was viewed by me and my siblings as an extension of Sunday. In other words, it wasn't exactly bad but it wasn't a day that we played with friends so it was often one of the last hurdles prior to summer really getting underway. The reason? My parents planned the day around visiting family grave sites from Salt Lake to southern Idaho, and would often share family history stories as we traveled interspersed with music and other "breaks".

We'd begin the day by picking flowers to place in the small vases my mom bought. We had a couple of large lilac bushes and they would usually be coming into full bloom just at this time of year so we'd make little bouquets from these and a few other early flowers. They'd all be packed into a box, and we'd pile into the family van.

We'd often spend the entire day driving, with my mom and/or dad telling us some stories about the person(s) who’s grave we were immediately on the way to visit. My family was always very musical and we'd also sing as we drove. I know, it sounds kind of campy. But for all of the complaining I made about not being able to play with friends just as summer was beginning, I usually enjoyed it and have fond memories of those times. It is probably what led me to really learn to love family history, and not just finding names – I mean real family history that includes researching journals, getting to know the people, learning to see myself in my roots.

So, back to the here and now: I don’t do this with my own family. Part of it is we don’t live near any of our family, both living and deceased. But even still, I would be a liar if I said that tomorrow will be anything more than a day off for me, my wife, and our children. School is out, and summer is already in full swing for them. We have a hike planned in the morning followed by a picnic lunch, and then the older kids will be off to spend the afternoon with friends while my wife and I work on projects around the house.

Where did memorial day go, though?

My question – do you have anything planned for tomorrow that is tied to the purpose of Memorial Day? I’m curious if I am an outlier in this case, or if we reflect a common trend. Is the holiday just another day off now?

[_Blixa]

...My parents planned the day around visiting family gravesites from Salt Lake to southern Idaho, and would often share family history stories as we traveled interspesed with music and other "breaks".

We'd begin the day by picking flowers to place in the small vases my mom bought. We had a couple of large lilac bushes and they would usually be coming into full bloom just at this time of year so we'd make little bouquets from these and a few other early flowers. They'd all be packed into a box, and we'd pile into the family van....

This reminds me of my Memorial Day memories! My Utah family would do the same thing, though ours wasn't as big a tour as your grave site visits were: we just went to the SLC cemetery and one out in Holladay.

I loved that tradition, and I really miss it, now that I don't live in Utah. I learned a lot of history on those trips and not just family history. It was on Memorial Day visits to the SLC cemetery that I first learned of the relocation camps that Japanese American citizens were put into during WWII. This came as answer to my questions about a Japanese/Buddhist section of the cemetery: not only the exotic look of Japanese characters on the headstones, but the offerings of food as well as flowers made me curious as child.

Most of our family graves in the city cemetery are near some red steps that always fascinated me. Why were they there? Where did they lead to? When I was last home, in 2007, I was visited the SLC cemetery for some research I was working on, as well as to pay homage to the past. I was sad to see "my" red steps were in such disrepair:



I'm sad I can't visit graves tomorrow. I will probably virtually visit them, however. Last Memorial Day, I found I could tour a lot of the SLC cemetery via Google street view. I will do that again today or tomorrow and check if the viewable area has been extended.

[_1 Iron]

I'm sad I can't visit graves tomorrow. I will probably virtually visit them, however. Last Memorial Day, I found I could tour a lot of the Salt Lake City cemetery via Google street view. I will do that again today or tomorrow and check if the viewable area has been extended.

That's a great idea, Blixa! Thanks!

[_1 Iron]

Blixa -

I should add that much of my heritage comes from the British isles and included people mentioned in the D&C. When we went to cemeteries in northern Utah, the stories told included how "so-and-so" helped found a place and what it looked like when only native Americans and trappers lived among the wildlife. My dad is an engineer, and my mom was a homemaker but had a solid education on natural history so we'd also talk about what made the area look like it did, how the changes in technology influenced the cultural changes that we were then seeing - now that I think back on it, I am amazed at the value of the discussions.

I think my wife and I could come up with a way to spend the day that reflects this same "spirit", if not the exact form.

I don't know if it came across in my last one sentence response. But I really did enjoy your entire post.

[_Joseph]

Remember all those in the sites of devastation and disaster who can't visit a cemetary because they are under water, are no longer there or the headstones and markers have been destroyed or taken away.

All across the midwest with the rain and rivers to Japan with the earthquake and tsunami to New Orleans where the Hurricane damage still stands we find burial locations no longer accessible.

The memory remains even when the location cannot be approached.

[_Jersey Girl]

My question – do you have anything planned for tomorrow that is tied to the purpose of Memorial Day? I’m curious if I am an outlier in this case, or if we reflect a common trend. Is the holiday just another day off now?

1 Iron,

I'm sorry, but I have to ask this. What do you think the purpose of Memorial Day is?

[_Blixa]

Blixa -

I should add that much of my heritage comes from the British isles and included people mentioned in the D&C. When we went to cemeteries in northern Utah, the stories told included how "so-and-so" helped found a place and what it looked like when only native Americans and trappers lived among the wildlife. My dad is an engineer, and my mom was a homemaker but had a solid education on natural history so we'd also talk about what made the area look like it did, how the changes in technology influenced the cultural changes that we were then seeing - now that I think back on it, I am amazed at the value of the discussions.

I think my wife and I could come up with a way to spend the day that reflects this same "spirit", if not the exact form.

I don't know if it came across in my last one sentence response. But I really did enjoy your entire post.

Thanks. My heritage is much the same, though my family are much later in their arrival in the Great Basin...not til WWI. Though, of course, I too heard those kind of stories about the role various family figures played in local and family "history:" for example, my maternal Grandmother's uncle ("our Harry") worked as head Butler for the Wall family; you might know the mansion he worked in better as the LDS Business College (no longer, however):



I enjoyed these times very much; both my parents taught me a lot about Utah and Salt Lake history merely by always pointing out various buildings or places and talking about what they were or meant: the Lion and Beehive House, the Cathedral of the Madeline, the site of the former Gardo mansion ("Amelia's Palace"), the Masonic Temple, the Eagle Gate, the brewery in Parley's Hollow (I just recently saw the remains of that last time I was home now that that area has been made into an accessible hiking and biking area), the Old Mill, the unused blocks of granite cut for the Temple that you can still see in Little Cottonwood Canyon, the Japanese graves in the SLC cemetery, all these are examples of the kind of "oral history" my parents conveyed to me.

I like your idea of keeping the spirit of this kind of tradition alive in your own family, though you won't be visiting the same graves, perhaps you can use it as a time to not only convey family history, but also the local history of whatever community you currently live in.

[_1 Iron]

Remember all those in the sites of devastation and disaster who can't visit a cemetary because they are under water, are no longer there or the headstones and markers have been destroyed or taken away.

All across the midwest with the rain and rivers to Japan with the earthquake and tsunami to New Orleans where the Hurricane damage still stands we find burial locations no longer accessible.

The memory remains even when the location cannot be approached.

Joseph,

It's a good thought you shared here. Thank you for the reminder.

[_1 Iron]

My question – do you have anything planned for tomorrow that is tied to the purpose of Memorial Day? I’m curious if I am an outlier in this case, or if we reflect a common trend. Is the holiday just another day off now?

1 Iron,

I'm sorry, but I have to ask this. What do you think the purpose of Memorial Day is?

Hello Jersey Girl,

No need to apologize for asking. Because you asked, I figured I was missing something and looked it up. Not surprisingly, I had completely forgotten that it was originally intended as a memorial day for fallen veterans. I suspect this says two things:

First, I've probably eaten too much tuna fish with high mercury content for my age.

Second, I'm even further from appreciating the holiday for it's true purpose that I realized this afternoon. Sadly, this doesn't make me feel better about treating it like any other 3 day weekend.

I do recall taking little flags with us to the grave site of a great uncle who had served in the Army air corp during WWII, and a memorial for another who died in the Pacific theater as a marine while assaulting one of the beaches; but since my parents took the day as a chance to reflect on all who had passed, these memories are pretty far down in my recollection. Thank you for the reminder.

Perhaps you could share how you and yours spend the holiday?

[_Jersey Girl]

1 Iron

Hello Jersey Girl,

No need to apologize for asking. Because you asked, I figured I was missing something and looked it up. Not surprisingly, I had completely forgotten that it was originally intended as a memorial day for fallen veterans. I suspect this says two things:

First, I've probably eaten too much tuna fish with high mercury content for my age.

Second, I'm even further from appreciating the holiday for it's true purpose that I realized this afternoon. Sadly, this doesn't make me feel better about treating it like any other 3 day weekend.

I do recall taking little flags with us to the grave site of a great uncle who had served in the Army air corp during WWII, and a memorial for another who died in the Pacific theater as a marine while assaulting one of the beaches; but since my parents took the day as a chance to reflect on all who had passed, these memories are pretty far down in my recollection. Thank you for the reminder.

Perhaps you could share how you and yours spend the holiday?

That's what I thought was missing from your post, 1 Iron, the recognition/honoring of fallen veteran's. I didn't see it represented anywhere in your post and wondered if you had been taught something different about Memorial Day.