The unnatural sex practices of the Mormon people

[_zeezrom]

Children should be taught that sex is a very, very good thing, but also very powerful and capable of doing real emotional damage if misused. That's all I'm saying. If your parents failed to teach you that, then they did you wrong. I'm glad to hear you and your wife have apparently overcome the damage done to you by parents who failed in a very important aspect of child rearing.

My parents taught me this. They taught me sex is great as soon as you get married. They also told us that we need to stay the hell away from anything that turns us on. We should avoid anything that excites the procreative powers. This message was not a suggestion. It was pounded into us from the day I turned 11 and continued at a rapid-fire pace with the power of an F350 until I got married.

The talks given by Mr. Richard G. Scott give me nightmares, LOL. That guy was the fear of my life for many years.

[_Hades]

Nomad,

You had and have such healthy views of sexuality. Haven't you ever felt guilty for whacking off?

[_Hades]

Agreed. Mormonism regresses normal human sexual expression in many cases, creating undo shame, guilt and psychological hang-ups (like men and women who feel guilty engaging in "normal" sexual intimacy even after marriage...I know or have heard of many such persons).

Shame on you LDS church with your repressive and unnatural sexual phobias.

I always thought it was so odd that a person could hypothetically sneak away five minutes before their marriage, have sex, and have committed the "sin next to murder" and somehow grieve God, the angels and all the other heavenly voyeurs, but, by hanging in to some arbitrary moment of time known as the "official" marriage ceremony, God is well pleased and no sin committed, despite no difference in spousal commitment or love one towards the other.

Truly, the most disgusting aspect of Mormon teachings and the main reason I cannot have my children (or myself) attend the church even socially; I don't want that sort of harmful thinking passed on to my children like some debilitating mental virus.

Makes me sick to think I ever bought into such a dysfunctional system of sexual repression.

All the heavenly voyeurs. Well said Tchild. Heaven seems to like a good sex show.

[_LDSToronto]

First:

" And young women, please understand that if you dress immodestly, you are magnifying this problem by becoming pornography to some of the men who see you."

Anyone remember that Jim-Dandy of a quote? Stuff like that shapes a young woman and a young man's view of themselves.

Anyways, I never grew up in the church. My wife did. We approached marriage with completely different attitudes towards sex. My wife's sexual history was similar to mine prior to getting married -"experienced". This was a perfectly normal thing for me, but my wife was castigated by her family and ostracized and shamed by the "church" (quoted to mean that it was not just the church as an organisation, governing body, moral-setting institution, but also the members of her ward).

It took many years for her to overcome the guilt that she felt. For her, sex was a mixed up thing - how could she do something now that she had been punished for just a year or so earlier?

I know that the party line is, "The church does not teach that sex is dirty or wrong or evil". Well, at the very least, with quotes like the one above, the church creates an environment where guilt is the norm.

H.

[_moksha]

Some LDS men and women are sexually inhibited to the degree than it causes some dysfunction in their adult life, whereas other LDS men and women have no such dysfuntion. Whether this dysfunction is the result of teachings by the Church, overly zealous LDS families, simply being brought up in Orem, Utah or failing to fixate on Donny Osmond at an early age, who knows?

As far as unnatural sex practices goes, let he who does not enjoy a luke-warm jacuzzi full of lime green Jell-O cast the first stone.

[_why me]

The church has historically taken a very narrow view of what it considers "unnatural" sex practices. These practices include homosexuality, oral sex, masturbation, etc.

Of course, all of those practices are very much natural and very much a part of the spectrum of normal human sexuality.

On the other hand, the church has encouraged and continues to encourage unnatural sex practices. These include:

*Refraining from necking, petting etc while dating
*Refraining from premarital sex, even between fiances and others in a committed relationship; putting the breaks on normal physical expressions of love until an arbitrary legalistic hurdle has been cleared - one that, ironically, Joseph Smith ignored his whole life.
*Celibacy among homosexuals


I'd like to see the church move away from encouraging these types of unnatural (and often harmful) sex practices.

Of course the church could embrace the world and encourage threesomes. Maybe even double penetrations that one can see on porn which is deemed harmless by this board. Or the church should encourage premarital sex if people intend to marry or maybe the LDS church should allow everone to have sex as often as they want before marriage. And yes, maybe the church should encourage homosexuals to have sex too as often as they want. This would certainly play into gay cultural traditions. Heck, why have any sexual restraints at all. Maybe the LDS church shoud just encourage free love as the hippies did in the 60's.

Would that be okay with you Buff?

[_Jason Bourne]

The church and it's leader have taught and or still teach that

- sexual sins are the third worst sin and next to murder. It does not distinguish a reckless youth having sex in the heat of a passionate moment to one night stands to a married person who commits adultery (though Joseph F Smith once commented that there were varying degrees in this area).

- a parent would or should prefer to see a child dead than lose their virginity

- a girl should fight to the death if a victim of rape.

- sexual virtue is more precious than life

- if one commits sexual sin they should marry that person so they don't carry the sin into another relationship ( this from Kimball's famous book )

- sex sins will always carry some element of guilt into your future life ( there are many such quote that I can provide but I am away from my computer on an iPad)

- comments like who would want someone who has been with someone else.


Not only do such comments create shame and guilt that can carry into future relationships and thus create problems but it also causes those who do make mistakes to question they can be forgiven and wonder if they are forever tainted. And think about the issues this can create when a couple marries and perhaps one or both has sexual sin In their past.

Fear, shame, heavy guilt, control, lack of compassion and forgiveness all can and do create problems for LDS persons later in life. Of course some escape this bur many do not. Just because some have had it all wonderful does not mean these things were not hurtful for others. There are better ways to teach chastity than the LDS church historically has.

Please forgive typos. The iPad is tough to use for a long post in a small reply window.

[_why me]

Some LDS men and women are sexually inhibited to the degree than it causes some dysfunction in their adult life, whereas other LDS men and women have no such dysfuntion. Whether this dysfunction is the result of teachings by the Church, overly zealous LDS families, simply being brought up in Orem, Utah or failing to fixate on Donny Osmond at an early age, who knows?

As far as unnatural sex practices goes, let he who does not enjoy a luke-warm jacuzzi full of lime green Jell-O cast the first stone.

People are dysfunctional when it comes to sex period. It matters not if one is a Mormon or an atheist. It happens. Western societies have sex on the brain 24/7. It is all over magazines of various shades of content. This has to have an impact on sexual life and expectations.

[_why me]

The church and it's leader have taught and or still teach that

- sexual sins are the third worst sin and next to murder. It does not distinguish a reckless youth having sex in the heat of a passionate moment to one night stands to a married person who commits adultery (though Joseph F Smith once commented that there were varying degrees in this area).

- a parent would or should prefer to see a child dead than lose their virginity

- a girl should fight to the death if a victim of rape.

- sexual virtue is more precious than life

- if one commits sexual sin they should marry that person so they don't carry the sin into another relationship ( this from Kimball's famous book )

- sex sins will always carry some element of guilt into your future life ( there are many such quote that I can provide but I am away from my computer on an iPad)

- comments like who would want someone who has been with someone else.


Not only do such comments create shame and guilt that can carry into future relationships and thus create problems but it also causes those who do make mistakes to question they can be forgiven and wonder if they are forever tainted. And think about the issues this can create when a couple marries and perhaps one or both has sexual sin In their past.

Please forgive typos. The iPad is tough to use for a long post in a small reply window.

You wrote a lot of nonsense in your post. LDS young adults screw around too. And some confess their sins and some do not. Others may feel guilty about what they have done and others do not. Here is the point: there is forgiveness when forgiveness is asked. These days the LDS church is quite understanding of youthful sexual sins because of the nature of societies. Sexual imagings are everywhere.

Kimballs book is not doctrine. In fact when kimball spoke to the young people about sexual sin he worried as to whether if he was too hard on them. And yet, he felt compelled to warn them out of love for them. And some of things from his talks and firesides went into that book.

The leaders of the LDS church give advice and one can follow that advice or not. No one to my knowledge ever was excommunicated over a Mormon lay. Nor do many bishops care.

[_zeezrom]

I'm curious about the comment regarding guilt right after consummating the marriage. I've never heard of this before. That would be a sad way to start a honeymoon!