Bishop/Stake President "meetings"

[_jon]

I think I missed a memo, when did the board become 'Catholic Discussions'?

I would like to get ceeboo's take on it. Just curious. I remember as a young catholic boy, masturbation was on the high list of not what to do. Many boys were in the confessional confessing that sin. The exmos here act like it is an invasion of privacy. But I think that no church to my knowledge was encouraging masturbation and they were condemning it as a sin.

Am I correct in thinking that within Catholic Churches you 'volunteer' to have the meeting and that meetings with minors are done with parents present? Whereas within Mormon churches young people are 'summoned' to the meeting and parents are specifically excluded?

[_why me]

Am I correct in thinking that within Catholic Churches you 'volunteer' to have the meeting and that meetings with minors are done with parents present? Whereas within Mormon churches young people are 'summoned' to the meeting and parents are specifically excluded?

In the confessional, boys and girls are alone with the priest separated by a 'window' where one can not be seen. No parent goes into the confessional with their children. I am not sure if all Mormons are summoned to the bishop for a talk. However, when someone is getting a calling or getting a new title to their priesthood, it does happen.

All catholics should be confessing their sins to the priest. And that would include sexual sins among other sins.

[_jon]

Am I correct in thinking that within Catholic Churches you 'volunteer' to have the meeting and that meetings with minors are done with parents present? Whereas within Mormon churches young people are 'summoned' to the meeting and parents are specifically excluded?

In the confessional, boys and girls are alone with the priest separated by a 'window' where one can not be seen. No parent goes into the confessional with their children. I am not sure if all Mormons are summoned to the bishop for a talk. However, when someone is getting a calling or getting a new title to their priesthood, it does happen.

All catholics should be confessing their sins to the priest. And that would include sexual sins among other sins.

Don't Mormon Bishops actively interview youth on a regulalr basis and discuss these things, without it being a volunteered confessional session or a temple/calling interview? I think you'll find they do...

[_Buffalo]

Why this fascination with masturbation? This board seems to have a fetish with masturbating. I feel like I am with a group of teens who are overly wondering about it.

However, I have never been asked about sex or masturbation by any bishop or branch president. No one seems concerned with my sexual habits or anything else. But I do believe the catholic church is also concerned about masturbation and would like young people to confess such sins to the priest. Am I correct? Can you share with the audience just what happens in the confessional with priests and teens when masturbation is confessed? What is the usually reaction of the priest to such sins and what advice is given?

Not surprising, given the fact that you were never LDS.

[_Rambo]

The first time I heard about masturbation is when I was at church. One of the counsellors in the bishopric gave a whole lesson on this subject. I didn't know what he was talking about the whole time and I remember him telling us all the problems that you will have if you masturbate. Although I can't remember what the problems were.

The next time I heard about it was in a bishops interview and he asked me if I masturbate. I remember getting asked if I masturbate probably every other bishops interview from when I was 12 until I was 28. When I was on a mission we would put a picture of Jesus up in the shower just to remind us not to masturbate. The last time I got asked about masturbation was when I was 28 and it was the last interview I had before I stopped going to church. This was a new bishop and he didn't know I masturbated before but he assumed because I guess all the young adult males in the ward confessed to him about it. All the bishop said was Rambo when was the last time you masturbated and looked at porn. He then said that it is about a 3 month wait before you can go to the temple if the action is repeated.

Ceeboo, the rest of the interviews were pretty standard. There was one time I confessed I went to far with a girl. We didn't have sex and I thought that was all I needed to say but then he wanted all the details. Like exactly what happened and if we were naked at the same time. I found it kind of weird and I really didn't know why he wanted so much details. I told him we didn't have sex or oral sex but I guess that wasn't enough for him.

I'm actually kind of pissed at my parents for having me go to those interviews when I was a young man. Now I think it is very wrong for a 50 year old man to ask a 12 year old boy if he masturbates. There should be some type of law against this.

[cacheman]

Interesting how you worded your recollection of the question. As for myself, I've never been asked nor have I asked about masturbation since I began doing interviews in the late 1970's.

That's good. I wish there were more people who recognized that it's not an appropriate topic of discussion in an interview, particularly with a minor.

I don't recall the exact wording of his question. Over the years, I heard the following:

1. Do you have a problem with masturbation?
2. Do you masturbate?
3. Have you engaged in masturbation?
4. Do you engage in self-stimulation?
5. Do you fondle yourself?

I'm not sure it matters how it was phrased, but when I was 12, I'm pretty sure it was either "Do you have a problem with masturbation?" or "Have you engaged in masturbation?" I don't know why you think my recollection is "interesting." Shrug.

[_cafe crema]

I would like to get ceeboo's take on it. Just curious. I remember as a young catholic boy, masturbation was on the high list of not what to do. Many boys were in the confessional confessing that sin. The exmos here act like it is an invasion of privacy. But I think that no church to my knowledge was encouraging masturbation and they were condemning it as a sin.

Am I correct in thinking that within Catholic Churches you 'volunteer' to have the meeting and that meetings with minors are done with parents present? Whereas within Mormon churches young people are 'summoned' to the meeting and parents are specifically excluded?

Yes you volunteer to go to confession and you volunteer what you confess, I have never been questioned about sins, I just confessed what I chose. The times the priest is specifically available to hear confessions are listed some where, at the church, in the bulletin, somewhere people can find it. If those times don't work you can make an appointment when it's convenient for you. One doesn't even have to go to confession at your regular parish, if another church is more convenient or comfortable you can go to confession there, and no one will question whether or not you been to confession. No parents are not present during confession, although in my experience, you are not "alone" with the priest, probably because for the most part confession is available for a 1/2 hour to 45 minutes Saturday afternoon before 5 o'clock Mass and there are always people milling about so the penitents have company so to speak. With my kids when they've gone to confession they've been in one area in the church, visible to me and everyone else in the church, so although I can't hear what is being said I can watch. I am comfortable with this, by watching their expressions and body language I feel I can tell if something is "off".

I find it hard to believe that Whyme knows what boys were confessing to, going to confession with my CCD class as a child we were not allowed to discuss what we confessed with our classmates, it was personal. As to the "confessionals" Whyme describes I've only seen them on TV, even the hundred year old church I attended as a child didn't have them. My MIL talks about the ones in her former parish, a very large church in Chicago but my parents churches didn't have them where they grew up.

[_why me]

I find it hard to believe that Whyme knows what boys were confessing to, going to confession with my CCD class as a child we were not allowed to discuss what we confessed with our classmates, it was personal. As to the "confessionals" Whyme describes I've only seen them on TV, even the hundred year old church I attended as a child didn't have them. My MIL talks about the ones in her former parish, a very large church in Chicago but my parents churches didn't have them where they grew up.

You must be kidding. Every catholic church that I have been to have confession booths. However, maybe in merry ol' england, one can confess in the aisle. Being a young catholic in the 60's, masturbation was a no-no. All catholics my age know perfectly well what I am talking about. There are many Irish memoirs by people who have written about catholic guilt and sex. To make a good confession, nothing should be left out when it comes to confessing sins. It is not a pick and choose confession with the priest. That being said, the priest has heard it all from many people and nothing is shocking to the priest. No problem there.

Thus, boys and girls who are masturbating should confess their sin to the priest. No of course, with the abuse scandals, it may be more cautious but....it is a sin to masturbate.

Your comrades on the catholic forum state that it is a sin.

http://forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=566789

[_Ceeboo]

Soooooooooooooo,

Catholic people suck way more than Mormons!


:)



Peace,
Ceeboo

[_cafe crema]

I find it hard to believe that Whyme knows what boys were confessing to, going to confession with my CCD class as a child we were not allowed to discuss what we confessed with our classmates, it was personal. As to the "confessionals" Whyme describes I've only seen them on TV, even the hundred year old church I attended as a child didn't have them. My MIL talks about the ones in her former parish, a very large church in Chicago but my parents churches didn't have them where they grew up.

You must be kidding. Every catholic church that I have been to have confession booths. However, maybe in merry ol' england, one can confess in the aisle. Being a young catholic in the 60's, masturbation was a no-no. All catholics my age know perfectly well what I am talking about. There are many Irish memoirs by people who have written about catholic guilt and sex. To make a good confession, nothing should be left out when it comes to confessing sins. It is not a pick and choose confession with the priest. That being said, the priest has heard it all from many people and nothing is shocking to the priest. No problem there.

Thus, boys and girls who are masturbating should confess their sin to the priest. No of course, with the abuse scandals, it may be more cautious but....it is a sin to masturbate.

Your comrades on the catholic forum state that it is a sin.

http://forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=566789

I am not kidding I've attended 8 parishes (probably more but those 8 stand out) had Bible studies, adult faith formation classes and volunteered in at least a half a dozen more. Not a one of them had confession booths, most had small rooms for confession where you could confess with a screen between you and the priest or you could confess face to face, the rest utilize other spaces available for confession. At the small old church of my early childhood, where I made my first confession and First Communion there were neither booths or rooms, for confession the front pews in the church were cordoned off and people waited in the back to go up front for confession. These days just about every parish I'm aware of withing driving distance offers reconciliation services twice a year. These are exactly as I described priests are seated in various places in the church with the penitents and priests visible to everyone. I can attend these services at my parish 6 times a year. This is what I grew up with and it was long before the abuse scandals broke.

But really the point here is not what is expected in confession but that confession itself is voluntary, no priest questions you about your behavior, they accept what you confess, and assume you are being forthright. No priest will ask if you masturbate and then after finding out you don't know what that is explain it to you and ask if you've done it.

As to masturbation being a sin in need of confession I never commented on that I said I don't believe you know what other boys confessed. All in all I don't believe many of the "Catholic experiences" you describe are your own, I believe they are a montage of things you've read or seen in movies and on TV, in short fiction.

And finally "To make a good confession, nothing should be left out when it comes to confessing sins" Canon law says nothing like this about confession, and you seem to forget what happens every Sunday, you know that stuff that goes on at the Mass you say you attend.