Its been fun today

[_Yoda]

You, uncharitably, misunderstand. I want the freedom of expression to remain but I also would enjoy by appealing to the decency of posters, that they participate sans the hostility, the disingenuous snobbiness, and the personal hostility that many a defender faces when one shows up.

Stem, I agree that some posters here have been blatantly hostile toward you. I don't condone this type of behavior, either. Unfortunately, since this is a free speech board, it does allow for hostilities to occur.

I think that what you will find is that those posters who are blatantly hostile are often blatantly hostile to EVERYONE who disagrees with their viewpoint, or, who just might rub them the wrong way. It has very little to do with you, personally. And, since it is pretty clear who those posters are, since it is a fairly consistent pattern, I suggest that you take jon's advice, and put those posters on Ignore.

You strike me to be a very nice person. I think that if we were in the same ward, we would likely be friends.

My frustration with you is that, at times, you seem to have problems comprehending what is being posted. It appears that you have a true literacy problem, and may need some help in reading comprehension. I say this, not as a slam to you, but point it out as a teacher. I often think that your misinterpretation of posts cause some on the board to detect animosity from you that, in fact, is not really there. Often, once you have digested the true meaning of a post, which might take a poster rephrasing something several times, it is found that you actually AGREE with their point, when originally, it was thought that you disagreed.

Once I realized that this is what was happening with you, it became much easier for me to communicate with you.

I hope that you have not taken offense by what I have said here. I am posting in the spirit of kindness, and as an educator. There are several teachers on this board. Blixa, Jersey Girl, and myself come to mind off the top of my head, but there are others. If you have questions about how to interpret a post, please feel free to ask! :-)

[_stemelbow]

Stem, I agree that some posters here have been blatantly hostile toward you. I don't condone this type of behavior, either. Unfortunately, since this is a free speech board, it does allow for hostilities to occur.

I'll repeat then, I agree witht he rules of the board. I don't agree with the hostile tone. That's all. I woudl like to see the atmosphere to, itself, squeeze out the hostility and I truly have the optimistic view that if I appeal to people's hearts and minds, they will realize that they aren't doing this place any favors with their hostility.

I think that what you will find is that those posters who are blatantly hostile are often blatantly hostile to EVERYONE who disagrees with their viewpoint, or, who just might rub them the wrong way. It has very little to do with you, personally. And, since it is pretty clear who those posters are, since it is a fairly consistent pattern, I suggest that you take jon's advice, and put those posters on Ignore.

You strike me to be a very nice person. I think that if we were in the same ward, we would likely be friends.

As it is, if we all knew each other in person we’d probably be nicer to each other and more of us would be friends. No doubt. But that is probably, in my mind, one of the problems. This doesn’t happen here because of the general tone here. It’s the hostility that drives wedges.

My frustration with you is that, at times, you seem to have problems comprehending what is being posted. It appears that you have a true literacy problem, and may need some help in reading comprehension. I say this, not as a slam to you, but point it out as a teacher. I often think that your misinterpretation of posts cause some on the board to detect animosity from you that, in fact, is not really there. Often, once you have digested the true meaning of a post, which might take a poster rephrasing something several times, it is found that you actually AGREE with their point, when originally, it was thought that you disagreed.

It’s plain silly to put this on me. Everyone, as I’ve seen, has misinterpreted and has had problems comprehending what is being posted. Its classically trendy right now to blame ol’ stem, but let’s be a little more honest shall we? I readily admit I have and can misunderstand anyone’s point.

Once I realized that this is what was happening with you, it became much easier for me to communicate with you.

Which is to ignore me? I don’t really recall you attempting to communicate with me to tell the truth. I mean this with no offense of course. I’m just wondering what became easier? I don’t’ recall any attempt to communicate with me beyond a passing comment about the negatives you perceive in me. I’m fine with that, actually. Just curious.

I hope that you have not taken offense by what I have said here. I am posting in the spirit of kindness, and as an educator. There are several teachers on this board. Blixa, Jersey Girl, and myself come to mind off the top of my head, but there are others. If you have questions about how to interpret a post, please feel free to ask! :-)

Don’t worry about it. I find no offense at all. I just think your condescending teacher perspective to be a bit off, but not that you’re so wrong about me, but that you are blind to the problems of yourself and others.

[_Ceeboo]

There are several teachers on this board. Blixa, Jersey Girl, and myself come to mind off the top of my head

Way cool (didn't know that)

Perhaps a reason as to why I enjoy you three so much.

Peace,
Ceeboo

[_ludwigm]

There are several teachers on this board. Blixa, Jersey Girl, and myself come to mind off the top of my head, but there are others.

I was one for 39 years. Today I am pensioned.

And I am tired. Very tired.

[_jon]

Stem, you could choose to ignore what you perceive to be hostility.

I hate to be sarcastic, but no kidding. As I said, I've tried. I just think it lessens the ability to be productive here.

If you treat constructive, friendly advice with sarcasm then it might explain why people give up on you and perhaps why you draw some perceived hostility.

[_Yoda]

It’s plain silly to put this on me. Everyone, as I’ve seen, has misinterpreted and has had problems comprehending what is being posted. Its classically trendy right now to blame ol’ stem, but let’s be a little more honest shall we? I readily admit I have and can misunderstand anyone’s point.

It's not silly to "put this on you" when it is a consistent pattern. Yes, granted, it is common for people to occasionally misinterpret the written word on message boards for a variety of reasons (i.e. no eye contact, lack of voice inflection, etc.). However, in your case, it happens more often than not. A perfect example of this is the conversation you had with Just Me which you mentioned in your OP of this thread. Just Me was not attacking you. She was simply trying to clarify her point, which you kept missing, over several pages of dialogue.

Which is to ignore me? I don’t really recall you attempting to communicate with me to tell the truth. I mean this with no offense of course. I’m just wondering what became easier? I don’t’ recall any attempt to communicate with me beyond a passing comment about the negatives you perceive in me. I’m fine with that, actually. Just curious.

I honestly haven't been participating on the board much at all lately, so I haven't ignored you anymore than I have ignored anyone. And yes, I have communicated with you on several threads. As a matter of fact, I supported and agreed with your points. I don't have the time or inclination to dig up those threads at the moment since they occurred several months ago. As I said, I haven't really been that active of a poster lately due to my schedule. As I explained in my prior post, communicating with you became easier for me once I gained a sense of what some of your limitations were. And true, we did get off to a rocky start, but I was under the impression that we had moved past it, particularly since I had supported you on several issues involving defense of the Church. I'm sorry that you don't remember, or, maybe my posts were simply overlooked by you.

Don’t worry about it. I find no offense at all. I just think your condescending teacher perspective to be a bit off, but not that you’re so wrong about me, but that you are blind to the problems of yourself and others.

I'm sorry that you took my feedback as condescending. I was simply trying to give you some insight as to why posters may be reacting the way they are to your posts, and as an educator, was attempting to offer you some tools to improve your writing and reading skills so that you could be better understood. Hurting you or attacking you was not my intent, so I apologize if you took it that way. How am I blind to the problems of myself and others? I have certainly never stated that I am perfect, or that I always interpret things correctly. I also acknowledge that I do fly off the handle at times. I think that everyone does. As far as acknowledging the problems of others on the board in how they treat you, I addressed that in the opening of my prior post. I do agree that some posters have been unnecessarily hostile and rude to you, and I publicly stated that I don't condone that behavior.

[_stemelbow]

It's not silly to "put this on you" when it is a consistent pattern. Yes, granted, it is common for people to occasionally misinterpret the written word on message boards for a variety of reasons (i.e. no eye contact, lack of voice inflection, etc.). However, in your case, it happens more often than not. A perfect example of this is the conversation you had with Just Me which you mentioned in your OP of this thread. Just Me was not attacking you. She was simply trying to clarify her point, which you kept missing, over several pages of dialogue.

Liz, I'm not sure what more to say. I didn't say Just me was attacking me. Indeed I explicitly said the opposite. I'm sorry, but its apparent you missed my point on it all.

I honestly haven't been participating on the board much at all lately, so I haven't ignored you anymore than I have ignored anyone. And yes, I have communicated with you on several threads. As a matter of fact, I supported and agreed with your points. I don't have the time or inclination to dig up those threads at the moment since they occurred several months ago. As I said, I haven't really been that active of a poster lately due to my schedule. As I explained in my prior post, communicating with you became easier for me once I gained a sense of what some of your limitations were. And true, we did get off to a rocky start, but I was under the impression that we had moved past it, particularly since I had supported you on several issues involving defense of the Church. I'm sorry that you don't remember, or, maybe my posts were simply overlooked by you.

No problem here. I probably don't recall your name popping up on too many posts directed my way, other than these types that seem to try to force negatives on me. If I missed some. My bad. Sorry.

I'm sorry that you took my feedback as condescending. I was simply trying to give you some insight as to why posters may be reacting the way they are to your posts, and as an educator, was attempting to offer you some tools to improve your writing and reading skills so that you could be better understood. Hurting you or attacking you was not my intent, so I apologize if you took it that way. How am I blind to the problems of myself and others? I have certainly never stated that I am perfect, or that I always interpret things correctly. I also acknowledge that I do fly off the handle at times. I think that everyone does. As far as acknowledging the problems of others on the board in how they treat you, I addressed that in the opening of my prior post. I do agree that some posters have been unnecessarily hostile and rude to you, and I publicly stated that I don't condone that behavior.

Well I appreciate the support for what’s its worth. I certainly can improve on many things, but can’t we all?

[_consiglieri]

Hi, Stem!

I will give you my two cents' worth as to why you feel mistreated on this board.

It is because you are a quintessential board nanny.

It seems that more than 50% of your posts involve an attempt to shame others into what you deem acceptable and civil discourse.

Nobody likes that.

But I sense that you use your shaming tactics not only to moderate the discourse, but often to shape the discourse more to your liking.

Nobody likes that more.

I think if you give this some serious introspection, you may find at least a grain of truth in what I have said.

Marry the man today
And change his ways . . . tomorrow.

All the Best!

--Skylieri

[_stemelbow]

Hi, Stem!

I will give you my two cents' worth as to why you feel mistreated on this board.

It is because you are a quintessential board nanny.

It seems that more than 50% of your posts involve an attempt to shame others into what you deem acceptable and civil discourse.

That would clearly make sense, Consig, if it were true that the hostility shown toward me was not here before I ever showed up. As it is, the hostility directed at me was here before I ever posted here. Indeed, no one likes to be told they are wrong or are doing things wrong. I get that. But I don't think that warrants hostile replies, as you seem to.

Nobody likes that.

But I sense that you use your shaming tactics not only to moderate the discourse, but often to shape the discourse more to your liking.

Nobody likes that more.

I think if you give this some serious introspection, you may find at least a grain of truth in what I have said.

Marry the man today
And change his ways . . . tomorrow.

All the Best!

--Skylieri

That's fine. I think there is truth in what you say. When someone behaves poorly that person most often does not like others pointing that out. Thanks for the comments.

[_jon]

Hi, Stem!

I will give you my two cents' worth as to why you feel mistreated on this board.

It is because you are a quintessential board nanny.

It seems that more than 50% of your posts involve an attempt to shame others into what you deem acceptable and civil discourse.

That would clearly make sense, Consig, if it were true that the hostility shown toward me was not here before I ever showed up. As it is, the hostility directed at me was here before I ever posted here.

I think most of the readers of this thread would benefit from an explanation of what this means.