The Science of Lust

[_just me]

Sock, read that article I linked. It looks like they reference another porn watching study and have this to say about it:

What turns women on? Not even women always seem to know. Northwestern University researcher Meredith Chivers and colleagues showed erotic films to gay and straight men and women. They asked them about their level of sexual arousal, and also measured their actual level of arousal through devices attached to their genitals.

For men, the results were predictable: Straight men said they were more turned on by depictions of male-female sex and female-female sex, and the measuring devices backed up their claims. Gay men said they were turned on by male-male sex, and again the devices backed them up. For women, the results were more surprising. Straight women, for example, saidthey were more turned on by male-female sex. But genitally they showed about the same reaction to male-female, male-male, and female-female sex.

[_Rambo]

Confidence is very attractive. As a shy man that may be something you have to work on. Ask women out. Healthy men with a job and a clean record looking for a long term relationship are in high demand from what I hear. Don't be afraid of women and don't be afraid to put yourself out there.

Treat women like people. Don't treat them like a princess and don't treat them like a doormat.

Have a hobby or interest outside of video games. lol These are things you can talk about. They can also be a great way to meet people.

Have goals and ambition.

Grooming and health are important. Get in shape and take care of your body. If you don't know how to dress get a men's magazine. Wear clothes that fit well (use a tailorif you need to) and look good on you. Don't be afraid to use some product on your skin or hair and a dab of cologne.

Learn to flirt! Women love to be flirted with. Flirting can be sincere compliments, teasing, touching and body language. Make eye conact.

Learn what signals women send when they are interested. http://www.askmen.com/dating/curtsmith_ ... dvice.html

Be a responsible adult. Take care of your own s*** and own your choices.

Create healthy boudaries. Don't be a pushover. Stand up for yourself if you need to. Don't allow people to walk on you or take advantage of you.

Don't smother her. Be sure that you are not always the first one to initiate contact.

crap that is a lot of stuff to remember. But I have found when it does workout it is because I have done most of those points. The thing is I find is you have to have some what of a don't care attitude. Women hate needy guys and it seems to turn them right off. That's why whenever I don't really care if it works out between me and a girl they seem to want me more. It's when I do care that they seem to want me less. What a crazy world we live in. How do I pretend not to give a crap when really I do.

[_Some Schmo]

s*** that is a lot of stuff to remember. But I have found when it does workout it is because I have done most of those points. The thing is I find is you have to have some what of a don't care attitude. Women hate needy guys and it seems to turn them right off. That's why whenever I don't really care if it works out between me and a girl they seem to want me more. It's when I do care that they seem to want me less. What a crazy world we live in. How do I pretend not to give a s*** when really I do.

It's not an "I don't care" attitude. It's about confidence. It's been my experience that if you like yourself and are comfortable in your own skin, you can show as much interest in a woman as you want. If she needs to be by herself, she'll tell you and it doesn't freak you out (just like how you'd react with a good friend) because you have your own life. Successful (and healthy) couples aren't two halves of a whole (that's co-dependence); they're two independent people who choose to walk through life together.

Playing games like pretending you don't care is like a 10 year old slapping a girl he likes thinking he's throwing her off.

[_just me]

s*** that is a lot of stuff to remember. But I have found when it does workout it is because I have done most of those points. The thing is I find is you have to have some what of a don't care attitude. Women hate needy guys and it seems to turn them right off. That's why whenever I don't really care if it works out between me and a girl they seem to want me more. It's when I do care that they seem to want me less. What a crazy world we live in. How do I pretend not to give a s*** when really I do.

It's not an "I don't care" attitude. It's about confidence. It's been my experience that if you like yourself and are comfortable in your own skin, you can show as much interest in a woman as you want. If she needs to be by herself, she'll tell you and it doesn't freak you out (just like how you'd react with a good friend) because you have your own life. Successful (and healthy) couples aren't two halves of a whole (that's co-dependence); they're two independent people who choose to walk through life together.

Playing games like pretending you don't care is like a 10 year old slapping a girl he likes thinking he's throwing her off.

I'm in love with you. *wink* This, this, this!

[_Rambo]

It's not an "I don't care" attitude. It's about confidence. It's been my experience that if you like yourself and are comfortable in your own skin, you can show as much interest in a woman as you want. If she needs to be by herself, she'll tell you and it doesn't freak you out (just like how you'd react with a good friend) because you have your own life. Successful (and healthy) couples aren't two halves of a whole (that's co-dependence); they're two independent people who choose to walk through life together.

Playing games like pretending you don't care is like a 10 year old slapping a girl he likes thinking he's throwing her off.

Yeah I guess the don't care attitude must come off as confidence. That's a better way of putting it.

[_Some Schmo]

I'm in love with you. *wink* This, this, this!

*blushes - fights to maintain confidence...*

:)