Coffee
Wine
Tea
And replace them with the following unhealthy substitutes:
Soda
Red meat
Desserts.
The coffee and tea thing is especially egregious. The ONLY potentially harmful part of coffee and tea is the caffeine, and that's the only one that isn't banned.
Then they tell you to avoid masturbation, a universally-recognized natural and health-promoting activity that prevents cancer and leads to happier, healthier sexuality and better marriages.
So they're encouraging members to shorten their lives by becoming physically unhealthy. But additionally, they foster an environment that causes severe mental anxiety. Utah is #1 for depression and suicidal thoughts. Mormons aren't happy. Whether it's the culture of perfectionism and shame or the depressing miserableness of the "restored gospel" itself with its oppressive list of Pharisaical dos and do nots, Mormonism is bad for you. Even if you don't end up offing yourself (which is especially likely that you will if you're Mormon and gay), all that stress is going to catch up to you sometime.
Intentionally or not, the brethren are behaving in a manner consistent with a group of men who are trying to shorten the lives of their followers. God works in mysterious ways!
