Temple Marriage Between One Alive and One Deceased

[_sock puppet]

From an obituary I recently read, the deceased was a TBM and ater his mission...

My love for my Lord and my Heavenly Father allowed me to serve in Their eternal plan as an ordained Seventy, but I had not yet found my eternal companion until March, 197X. The daughter of [fiance's parents], [fiance] and I were engaged to be married in November 197X, however, [fiance] was called home to Our Lord on August XX, 197X and I believed my heart was forever broken, yet my faith and deep love for Christ gave me the trust that we would once again be reunited, and through His appointed prophet, President Spencer W. Kimball, I was granted the privilege of being married and sealed to [fiance] for time and all eternity on November XX, 197X.

I've not heard of this before, but a SP friend of mine (yes, an SP friend of SP) told me something about James E Faust allowing in the 1990s for the sealing of an engaged pioneer couple that the man died before they were married.

My hat is off to the LDS Church for doing this, both for the surviving fiance and the deceased's family members that are TBMs.

[_just me]

I haven't ever heard of an example of this, where people who were not married in life and one is still living was sealed to the deceased. That is pretty cool.

I have heard of two deceased who were never married in life being sealed. Once.

Oh wait! Duh, I just recalled that in the early days of the church there are examples of leaaders sealing dead single ladies to themselves. Sorry. I remember now.

[_Willy Law]

Oh wait! Duh, I just recalled that in the early days of the church there are examples of leaaders sealing dead single ladies to themselves. Sorry. I remember now.

When on his death bed I asked him if there was anything that he would like me to do for him, he said "I would like to have some wives sealed to me." According to this request I have had two girls who died in the church sealed to him. Two others, apreciating his worth [,] have expressed a desire to have their daughters sealed to him, which will be done.

David H Cannon to John D.T. McAlister Dec. 4, 1885
The Development of LDS Temple Worship pg 55:

[_just me]

Oh wait! Duh, I just recalled that in the early days of the church there are examples of leaaders sealing dead single ladies to themselves. Sorry. I remember now.

When on his death bed I asked him if there was anything that he would like me to do for him, he said "I would like to have some wives sealed to me." According to this request I have had two girls who died in the church sealed to him. Two others, apreciating his worth [,] have expressed a desire to have their daughters sealed to him, which will be done.

David H Cannon to John D.T. McAlister Dec. 4, 1885
The Development of LDS Temple Worship pg 55:

And so it goes...

I've even seen examples of men having dead cousins sealed to them (can't recall who). Of course all KINDS of women were sealed to Joseph Smith. Some at their request while they were living and him dead.

I'm not sure if any other culture has participated in such a wide variety and experimentation of matrimony than the LDS culture.

[_zeezrom]

I don't understand how this helps in a practical way. Granted, I have never yet lost a person very close to me. Nothing lasts forever so it will happen, eventually. I will have to grieve and it will be painful.

I've read before that coping with the death of a spouse has a lot to do with looking to the future and moving on. Why set things in motion that limit your ability to move on? Marry your dead fiancé and you've just put an extension on the grieving process.

If I died, I would hope my wife finds a way to move on as quickly as possible.

[_sock puppet]

I don't understand how this helps in a practical way. Granted, I have never yet lost a person very close to me. Nothing lasts forever so it will happen, eventually. I will have to grieve and it will be painful.

I've read before that coping with the death of a spouse has a lot to do with looking to the future and moving on. Why set things in motion that limit your ability to move on? Marry your dead fiancé and you've just put an extension on the grieving process.

If I died, I would hope Dear Wife finds a way to move on as quickly as possible.

To a TBM, he had 'lost' his fiance not only for the balance of this life, but for eternity too. Given his LDS beliefs, the eternity after death is part of the future just as is the balance of one's life on this earth. He believes that had his fiance lived at least until the day of their temple wedding and been sealed to him before dying even the next day, he would at least be with her in the eternal hereafter. So, in light of his beliefs, this sealing was forward looking into the future too, and gave him some relief against the eternal enormity of his loss.

Now, because he is a man, he is allowed to find another wife (which he did in 1984) and marry her in the temple (with sealing) too. Suppose it were the other way around. He had died before their planned wedding day and she had lived. As a woman, LDS teachings are she can now only be sealed to one man. These are not the days of JSJr anymore. No polyandry sealings anymore. So if the surviving fiance were a woman, would the LDS Church have allowed her to go through with the sealing to her fiance, now dead?

[_Drifting]

Imagine explaining that to your new love interest.

"Have you been married before?"

"Oh yes, but don't worry, she was already dead..."

*sound of running feet, car door slamming and screeching of tyres*