Honor thy father and thy mother

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_sock puppet
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Re: Honor thy father and thy mother

Post by _sock puppet »

consiglieri wrote:I think children should respect their parents' religious beliefs.

I have this feeling, however, that within the LDS context, kids who are raised Mormon by their TBM parents may feel religiously challenged should their parents become disaffected.

What could challenge a TBM's religious beliefs more than the parents who inclucated Mormonism into their noggin going inactive?

Is it possible the perceived need to defend religious beliefs against the greatest challenge imaginable results in this type of unseemly overreaction?

All the Best!

--Consiglieri

I hadn't thought of the fact that my sister feels threatened by our parents having each gone inactive, and I would say my mother has gone apostate (doesn't want a Mormon funeral, she thinks cremation will avoid the issue for my sister insisting that burial be in the temple get-up).

Taking that a step further, my sister's anger and mistreatment towards my mother may be a manifestation of my sister's own nagging doubts about Mormonism's truth claims.

I remember seeing a year ago the widow of my bishop when I was 16-21 (including processing me to go on a mission). She knows full well I'm apostate, and work towards enlightening people about the early historical facts and problems. I have beer with one of her sons on occasion--he's more irreverent than I am towards Mormonism, if that is possible. After we caught up on what was happening with each other's family, she made an obvious look at my grocery bag with a 6'er of Guinness Extra Stout, and then she said referring to herself, "I hope this good living has all been worth it; I guess I'll know soon enough." Each time my sister calls my mother, it might dredge to the surface the nagging doubts even though my mother would never say anything about the Church to my sister, except 'that's good you and your kids are involved'.
_Yoda

Re: Honor thy father and thy mother

Post by _Yoda »

What persuaded your Mom to leave the Church, Sock Puppet?
_zeezrom
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Re: Honor thy father and thy mother

Post by _zeezrom »

liz3564 wrote:This is just barbaric. Sorry...it makes me want to slap her.

Liz,

It doesn't sound super surprising to me. Some people take religion way too seriously, and this is often the result. What can we learn from this?

It's kind of like how too many Mormons in a concentrated area can also be a sort of negative thing.
Oh for shame, how the mortals put the blame on us gods, for they say evils come from us, but it is they, rather, who by their own recklessness win sorrow beyond what is given... Zeus (1178 BC)

The Holy Sacrament.
_Yoda

Re: Honor thy father and thy mother

Post by _Yoda »

zeezrom wrote:
liz3564 wrote:This is just barbaric. Sorry...it makes me want to slap her.

Liz,

It doesn't sound super surprising to me. Some people take religion way too seriously, and this is often the result. What can we learn from this?

It's kind of like how too many Mormons in a concentrated area can also be a sort of negative thing.

For the record, I hated living in Utah. We lived in Orem for 8 years. It was the most depressing time of my life. The Mormons I knew there were the most un-Christlike bunch I had ever encountered.

When we moved the NC, I felt like I was with "real" Church members again.
_zeezrom
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Re: Honor thy father and thy mother

Post by _zeezrom »

liz3564 wrote:For the record, I hated living in Utah. We lived in Orem for 8 years. It was the most depressing time of my life. The Mormons I knew there were the most un-Christlike bunch I had ever encountered.

When we moved the NC, I felt like I was with "real" Church members again.

Yeah, too much of anything is a negative, I suppose.

Too many Mormons in a small area causes an unhealthy community...

Too much religion (taking it too seriously) causes people to not respect family members...

What about too much Christ? Can you have too much Christ? Hmmm.......
Oh for shame, how the mortals put the blame on us gods, for they say evils come from us, but it is they, rather, who by their own recklessness win sorrow beyond what is given... Zeus (1178 BC)

The Holy Sacrament.
_sock puppet
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Re: Honor thy father and thy mother

Post by _sock puppet »

liz3564 wrote:You know...this type of behavior really angers me.

Both of my parents are LDS. But I was always brought up that family came first. No matter what happened, we should always be there for each other no matter what.

I just don't understand how your sister can, in good conscience, treat your mother this way. Your Mom sounds like a very lovely, giving person. And how can she deny her children getting to know their grandmother?

This is just barbaric. Sorry...it makes me want to slap her.

We've only touched the iceberg, but I agree with your sentiments.

My mother was gung-ho LDS. Two children under age 10 and yet was a temple worker two days a week, taught Sunday School and was deeply involved in organizing most of the ward parties. When I was about 10-12 years old, she took on being what I think would now be called the Young Women's Pres (great parties with all those hot looking teenage girls coming to our house and doting over me as 'a cute boy'--if only they knew what thoughts were running through my mind). Mom was always organizing ward activities or those just for the teenagers (Girls camp, parties, etc). We got a new bishop, and he relieved her of most everything, saying she was looking exhausted and was overworked, Church-wise. (My dad to this day says he never mentioned the calling-load of my mother to the bishop.)

Once my mother got a breather, inactivity was soon to follow. It was more than 15 years since she'd darkened the door to a Mormon chapel (other than to my mission farewell and then report) before I ever heard her utter a word of doubt. While her doubts are now voiced to me a couple of times a year, never heard her utter an anti word.
_sock puppet
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Re: Honor thy father and thy mother

Post by _sock puppet »

zeezrom wrote:
liz3564 wrote:This is just barbaric. Sorry...it makes me want to slap her.

Liz,

It doesn't sound super surprising to me. Some people take religion way too seriously, and this is often the result. What can we learn from this?

It's kind of like how too many Mormons in a concentrated area can also be a sort of negative thing.
liz3564 wrote:For the record, I hated living in Utah. We lived in Orem for 8 years. It was the most depressing time of my life. The Mormons I knew there were the most un-Christlike bunch I had ever encountered.
Yea, I returned from my mission where there were "real" Church members, as you say, to Utah, to resume college at BYU. It's like the "Spirit" gets sucked out of you in Happy Valley.
liz3564 wrote:When we moved the NC, I felt like I was with "real" Church members again.
That's truly understandable.
_consiglieri
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Re: Honor thy father and thy mother

Post by _consiglieri »

sock puppet wrote:Taking that a step further, my sister's anger and mistreatment towards my mother may be a manifestation of my sister's own nagging doubts about Mormonism's truth claims.



I am no psychologist, SP, but it does sound like your sister's anger is a manifestation of her own insecurity.

I remember about fifteen years ago giving a fireside at a friend's house in which I focused on the teachings of grace in the Book of Mormon.

A lady in attendance began voicing her disapproval in stentorian tones, going so far as to challenge me on why God would be "revealing" this stuff to a young person like me (I was in my early 30's at the time) and not to his prophet.

I was stunned and, believe it or not, speechless.

My friend, whose house I was having the fireside at, jumped into the breach and asked this lady point blank, "Why are you so defensive?"

She began to beg off on how she wasn't defensive, and he followed up with a recap on how angry she was becoming and that this is a sure sign of being defensive. He asked her again why she was being so defensive.

This lady backed down and the fireside was able to continue without further interruption.

I still remember how grateful I was for my friend coming to my rescue like that.

I don't know if a similar strategy would work with your sister, but it might be worth considering.

All the Best!

--Consiglieri
You prove yourself of the devil and anti-mormon every word you utter, because only the devil perverts facts to make their case.--ldsfaqs (6-24-13)
_sock puppet
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Re: Honor thy father and thy mother

Post by _sock puppet »

zeezrom wrote:
liz3564 wrote:For the record, I hated living in Utah. We lived in Orem for 8 years. It was the most depressing time of my life. The Mormons I knew there were the most un-Christlike bunch I had ever encountered.

When we moved the NC, I felt like I was with "real" Church members again.

Yeah, too much of anything is a negative, I suppose.

Too many Mormons in a small area causes an unhealthy community...

Too much religion (taking it too seriously) causes people to not respect family members...

What about too much Christ? Can you have too much Christ? Hmmm.......

I've long thought that if I lived in Tulsa, it would be the Southern Baptists that chafe my ass, or if Boston, the Catholics... . I live in Zion. It's the Mormons for me.
_sock puppet
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Re: Honor thy father and thy mother

Post by _sock puppet »

zeezrom wrote:What about too much Christ? Can you have too much Christ? Hmmm.......

Absolutely. Too much of a high, virtually unattainable bar.

Better to have more humanity, less Christianity.
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