They have to be able to both emotionally and financially support more than one woman.
I don't think this is necessarily so. I think it just as likely that people can and do create systems of polygamy wherein one or more of the wives can be married, have children, pursue a career outside of the home and contribute financially, so long as one or more of the wives finds her calling to be child rearing.
Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up.
Chinese Proverb
My question is for the women, if another man wanted to be your husband and the first gave his consent would you do it?
I don't think it's an unrealistic question.
Speaking only for myself, the question would be unrealistic for me. I would not cooperate with the desire of a man who assumed the right to "consent" to what I do with my time, my body, my heart, or my life.
That wouldn't happen in my world.
Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up.
Chinese Proverb
Zelder wrote:I think a society that believes that polygyny is the only acceptable form of non-monogamy is going to inevitably see plenty of heartache. Men an women are equals and need to be treated as equals in marriage otherwise there is going to be discontent. If you open the door to all forms a non-monogamy then all the problems with a strictly polygynous society dissappear.
I view plural marriage as an extension of monogamy. What is the difference between fornication and righteous sex within marriage? A covenant. What difference does a covenant make? Well the man and woman become a mini-united order. We share all things in common. Her problems are my problems, her happiness is my happiness, my money is her money and we stick together forever becausue that's love. The sex is a big part of what binds us together.
Plural marriage the way Joseph Smith appeared to have been doing it would just expand that united order family unit to be able to include lots of people for more support, more divesity, more wealth sharing and more sexual options. In reality, this is what most people want and if done property could be extremely fullfilling.
Explain to me how it is fulfilling to the woman. It seems to me that for the woman, everything decreases. Your first paragraph makes perfect sense, and is what I think of when I envision a monogamous celestial marriage. The second paragraph makes no sense at all. I sort of get the "more people for support", but you don't need a "sister wife" to have support. As far as sexual options...it seems to me that those options are rather one-sided.
Explain to me how it is fulfilling to the woman. It seems to me that for the woman, everything decreases.
Not necessarily.
Some things could actually increase for the women. Imagine yourself a woman on a career track who would like to experience marriage and motherhood. Imagine yourself another woman whose dream it is to be a married stay at home mom and nurture children.
Imagine that each of you can have your needs and goals met in this system.
Not saying that this is what I would choose, but there are possible benefits given the right match of circumstances and personalities.
Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up.
Chinese Proverb
I would like to add that if both my wife and I believed God commanded us to practice polygamy, I think it would cause the following to happen:
1. My current wife would have no choice but to distance herself emotionally from me. 2. My current wife would be expected to replace some of that bond she once had with me to her sister wife. 3. If she was unable to do #2, she would end up going inward, potentially harming herself.
Just a guess but I would have to say there is much more potential for the wife than for the husband in polygamy.
Oh for shame, how the mortals put the blame on us gods, for they say evils come from us, but it is they, rather, who by their own recklessness win sorrow beyond what is given... Zeus (1178 BC)
Or...you could be a woman who wants multiple husbands, wait for the testosterone to kick in, for them to do each other in, then take the life insurance money and run.
I really think in evil ways, don't I? ;-)
Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up.
Chinese Proverb
Jersey Girl wrote:Speaking only for myself, the question would be unrealistic for me. I would not cooperate with the desire of a man who assumed the right to "consent" to what I do with my time, my body, my heart, or my life.
That wouldn't happen in my world.
I'm not sure I'm understanding you but my question was not suggesting it is the husbands desire but instead was the wife's desire to have another husband and the first husband being okay with the situation.
...but there is a chance the wife may love having sister wives. I just don't know.
Oh for shame, how the mortals put the blame on us gods, for they say evils come from us, but it is they, rather, who by their own recklessness win sorrow beyond what is given... Zeus (1178 BC)
Explain to me how it is fulfilling to the woman. It seems to me that for the woman, everything decreases.
Not necessarily.
Some things could actually increase for the women. Imagine yourself a woman on a career track who would like to experience marriage and motherhood. Imagine yourself another woman whose dream it is to be a married stay at home mom and nurture children.
Imagine that each of you can have your needs and goals met in this system.
Not saying that this is what I would choose, but there are possible benefits given the right match of circumstances and personalities.
I understand that. However, I also contend that you do not need to have a "sister wife" to have that type of support. Friends, older children, and grandparents are all resources for babysitting.
Frankly, I would much rather deal with the possible struggle of finding a babysitter than sacrifice sharing my life partner/soulmate.
Jersey Girl wrote:Speaking only for myself, the question would be unrealistic for me. I would not cooperate with the desire of a man who assumed the right to "consent" to what I do with my time, my body, my heart, or my life.
That wouldn't happen in my world.
I'm not sure I'm understanding you but my question was not suggesting it is the husbands desire but instead was the wife's desire to have another husband and the first husband being okay with the situation.
I misunderstood you. My apologies.
Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up.
Chinese Proverb