Translation of the Phaistos Disc has begun!

[_honorentheos]

Fanny.

[_Willy Law]

Certainly, this work will bring about a great source of enlightenment for the modern family. .

Can't wait, I love that show.

[_Kishkumen]

Fanny.

Wow! She divorced Elohim over that?

[_bcspace]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5XcKBmdfpWs&ob=av2n

[_zeezrom]

Fanny.

Wow! She divorced Elohim over that?

Kish,

It appears an explanation is finally necessary...

Here's the thing. On the eve of winter solstice, 1811, Elohim disguised Himself as a turtle dove and flew into the chambers of the High Angel, St. Cecilia. His intent, according to my personal messenger, was to seduce Her. I'm sorry to anyone that finds this offensive. It's not as crazy as it sounds. It turns out Celilia was the heir of a vast stronghold in the region of the galexy that HF already reserved for the CK. Years before this, Athena had aquired space and built a wonderful heaven seed. She had different ideas in store for heaven than what HF wanted. It's sort of a complicated mess, Kish. Just know that an aliance between Cecilia and HF meant trouble for Athena. Athena found out about this (a message from Apollo) and in a fit of rage, threw her javelin into his bedroom. Do you recall reading about the earthquakes in 1811-1812 around Missouri? Now you know what was happening.

Anyway, Athena was very fond of a particular angel who was due to be born on earth very soon. These two Women were kindred spirits. Their love for each other transcended that of David and Jonathan. Athena was planning to rule heaven along with her friend. Heavenly Father was jealous of Athena's friend so one night, while Athena slept at the loom, He sent her friend down to be born as Fanny.

Athena soon realized her beloved friend would be sealed to Joseph Smith for eternity, living in a different galaxy. It also turns out that HF didn't seem sorry about his courtship with Cecilia. His institution of polygamy among mortals was an arrogant show to Athena that things had changed for good.

She saw trouble on the horizon, Kish. She had a moment to act. Cut ties with Elohim while she still had some influence and power, or stay in a relationship that continued to diminish her opportunities to build heaven and fulfill her destiny.

In the following years, the two Gods (Athena and Elohim) became enemies, fighting tremendous battles that continue to this day.

[_zeezrom]

Ok folks,

I've been toying with rocks, scryer sticks, and goggles with only marginal success. None of these prophetic tools have given me passage to further translation but it has been an enlightening process nonetheless. For now, I will set the magic implements to the side and stick with the old fashioned method used by Gordon Hinckley and others for prophetic vision.

Just tonight, I experienced a breakthrough! I translated one more symbol: the fig. If you look at the disc, you will find it 5th from the beginning, starting on the outside ring. It has been revealed to me that this disc is read from the outside going inward.

Anyway, I'm slightly embarrassed to discuss the character of the fig. It gets into a topic that I find challenging to discuss on a public forum. Regardless of my hope for discretion, God has commanded me to continue. I am but a tool in her hands and cannot put my own desires before hers. A little background on the fig should help my gentle readers understand the context of the living scripture which unfolds before our very eyes.

The fig is central to very luxurious and decadent feast of the gods. You can find traces of this divine dinner in the mortals' celebration of the Dionysian Mysteries. The gods partook of figs during their heavenly feast and one fig slipped from the fingers of a god. This fig hit the earth and soon sprouted into a beautiful tree. From this tree, grows magic figs that when eaten, remove artifacts of social constraints and inhibitions. The final result is ecstasy. Dionysus himself oversees the experience of mortals eating the magic fig. The part I'm a little hesitant to share is that the experience (eating the magic fig) is often overseen by the son of Dionysus: Priapus.

Before you go and criticize me for incorporating a god such as Priapus, please keep in mind that Joseph Smith incorporated the Egyptian God Min, who has similar, rustic qualities.

So, the third symbol to be translated: the fig of luxuriuos fantasy and ecstasy.

Now, Downton Abbey!

[_zeezrom]

Here is a high-res digital scan of the beginnings of my "KEP":



The main reason for showing you my notes is for the benefit of the critics out there. I will never lock these notes in a vault.

[_Buffalo]

Truly these are days to remember - God again is speaking to her prophets!

[_Chap]

So, the third symbol to be translated: the fig of luxuriuos fantasy and ecstasy.

Careful with the figs, please ... what about sycophant?

Etymology

First attested in 1537. From Latin sȳcophanta (“informer, trickster”) from Ancient Greek συκοφάντης (sukophantēs), itself from σῦκον (sukon, “fig”) + φαίνω (phainō, “I show, demonstrate”). The gesture of "showing the fig" was a vulgar one, which was made by sticking the thumb between two fingers, a display which vaguely resembles a fig, which is itself symbolic of a (sykon 'vagina' also meant vulva). The story behind this etymology is that politicians in ancient Greece steered clear of displaying that vulgar gesture, but urged their followers sub rosa to taunt their opponents by using it.

[_Blixa]

This is turning out quite lovely!