"Easier the further you get away."

[_zeezrom]

Recently, during a telephone conversation, my dad said to me, "The longer you stay away from the church, the easier it gets to stay away."

His speech was carried by the deeper undertones typically propagated by LDS media and leadership proclamations. The church leadership wants the members to know that distancing one's self from the church is a downhill slide from morality and goodness. They want you to believe that staying close to the church is like climbing a mountain, which provides you with glorious blessings offered by the Sun God when you reach the top. Satan uses a flaxen cord to slowly entwine you and make power over you complete. Distance from the church slowly strips you of your predestined royalty and leaves you a dirty beggar of spiritual insight.

Fear is a powerful tool and it is used extensively by the believers of the faith. As you start to experiment and explore outside of the confines of the stately Correlation Department, you begin to sneak by one-directional barbs that pierce you on returning. There is fear that the further you wander off, the harder it will be to come back.

I would like to make a comment about my observations of my own experiences since distancing myself from the church. It has not gotten any easier to leave. I actually think it is getting harder. This is the most difficult thing I've ever been presented with in my entire life. Yes, it was a challenge to pay so much money to the church. Yes, it was a challenge to keep going to church after being bored out of my mind over and over again. But I was part of the clan. I was just like them. We wrapped each other up in fluffy blankets of friendship and rolled down the hills together and sang "the hills are alive".

Now, my world has flipped around. Now, I have a whole world of things to explore. There is no Correlation chain around my neck. I am free to look at any damn book I want and let my mind just wander. I can walk through the barley field and feel the ends touch my hands. But the Romans are coming. Lucius Aemilius Paullus is near. I can never be at peace. The war between beliefs must always be on the horizon. Differences in our gods must always bring us to arms.

[_consiglieri]

That was beautiful, Zeez.

Really beautiful.

[_Blixa]

It's so great to see someone embrace being a student and find joy in learning. I wish your father could see you this way and also see that such a thing is not a threat to him and his beliefs, but a way to widen and deepen the relationship the two of you have.

[_Buffalo]

If I was your dad, I'd give you a big hug and say, "I'm proud of you, son."

[_bcspace]

Recently, during a telephone conversation, my dad said to me, "The longer you stay away from the church, the easier it gets to stay away."

He's right.

[_zeezrom]

Thank you Consig.

My thoughts of the church are really depressing me lately. I'm not sure why.

[Guest]

It's so great to see someone embrace being a student and find joy in learning. I wish your father could see you this way and also see that such a thing is not a threat to him and his beliefs, but a way to widen and deepen the relationship the two of you have.

Too bad I couldn't be in one of your classes while I was at the U of U. Maybe in the next life?

[_zeezrom]

If I was your dad, I'd give you a big hug and say, "I'm proud of you, son."

:)

He did give me a hug after he gave me a blessing to help me believe in Joseph Smith again.

[_zeezrom]

He's right.

He could be except that I don't feel that way. Life would be softer to me if I returned to the fold.

[_Blixa]

It's so great to see someone embrace being a student and find joy in learning. I wish your father could see you this way and also see that such a thing is not a threat to him and his beliefs, but a way to widen and deepen the relationship the two of you have.

Too bad I couldn't be in one of your classes while I was at the U of U. Maybe in the next life?

I think we're already having our classes now...

Distance ed is still limited though :)

Plus we have to conduct it in uncongenial spaces ;(