unban Jersey Girl

[_Spurven Ten Sing]

You made the tough call. I love Jersey Girl, she has always been a good friend. I am going to miss her.

I think you did the right thing, though. Yours is a thankless job. Thanks for all you do.

Perhaps to avoid future uncertainty a new universal rule "Those who threaten legal action against the board will be permanently banned. No exceptions will be made for friends, mods, longtime posters, or gerbils."

[_Doctor CamNC4Me]

Hard to argue with that one. :)

[_Spurven Ten Sing]

One more thought.

Even if Shades wasn't threatened with financial ruin via lawsuit, I feel it is obvious that a member of a board that threatens to hurt that board needs a banning. Would someone really argue that this is an acceptable use of the community? That would be strange.

"I'm going to sue you, force you to do something, take your money, destroy the thing you've built over the years. What? you want me to leave your house? THAT'S NOT FAIR!!! You are an evil person! Let me stay on the couch and keep eating the cookies and drinking the coffee you paid for. IT'S MY RIGHT!"

Yeah, makes no sense. Is Shades our bitch or something?

[_why me]

The reason I have been reluctant to weigh in on this is because I don't like kicking a person when he or she is down. Specifically, I prefer not to mention when someone has been banned, much less the reasons behind it, because he or she is ipso facto not around to defend him- or herself.

But apparently you want to hear my reasoning anyway.

After a dust-up with Daheshist, Jersey Girl made the following threat in this post, emphasis added:

". . . you guys are gonna have a legal f*****g fight on your hands and I'll initiate it.

Keep in mind that there are no published disclaimers on this board so admin is in it up to their eyeballs if they don't knock this guy off the board."

I stated above at the beginning of the thread: threats and personal attacks have no place on a discussion board.

[_Chap]

...

". . . you guys are gonna have a legal f*****g fight on your hands and I'll initiate it.

Keep in mind that there are no published disclaimers on this board so admin is in it up to their eyeballs if they don't knock this guy off the board."

...

Here's my thought process: I can handle it if the board gets sued. Heck, if I'm guilty of some sort of wrongdoing, I can even handle it if I get sued. But what I simply can't handle is if me and my moderators get sued for something that a completely unrelated third party does. What makes it worse is if a lawsuit can come crashing down on my head due merely to my not being online during an arbitrary 15 minute segment of time.

... Satisfied?

Completely.

Jersey Girl's 'Do what I want in the next 15 minutes or I sue the administrators' demand was completely unreasonable. No board can tolerate someone acting that way, for whatever reason. It's sad, but she had to go, friend or no friend, and whatever her life history and past contribution to the atmosphere of the board. Otherwise Shades could not possibly have been expected to continue running this place.

(And by the way I am glad Daheshist is gone too. I felt sorry for him, but he was too abnormal for any kind of dialog.)

[_Shulem]

Yep, that about covers it in full. Nothing more really need be said. Jersey Girl picked up an axe and took a violent swing. Hence, she's been escorted out of the house and won't be coming back.

It seems in her anger she made a bad choice. It's her fault.

Paul O

[_Yoda]

While I am in favor of banning Darrick, I'm not sure if we've seen any clear evidence that he had physically confronted people from his threatening obsessions. If it's out there, I've missed it. Like I said, I favor banning in either case due to the pattern of threatening behavior, but that charge has been thrown out several times and it's been difficult to trace the source.

Yes, there IS evidence of physical confrontations. The police report that Dan filed indicated that Darrick physically threatened several secretaries in the Church Office Building, and then followed up by verbally threatening Dan and his family.

This is my view. It was completely irresponsible for us, as Moderators, to have allowed Darrick access to the board to begin with, based on his prior record (i.e. the police report filed by Dan). This has been a sticking point between Shades and I from the get-go, and this is why I see this whole incident differently from the clear-cut perspective of, "someone threatened to sue the board," etc.

We fell down on our responsibility to protect this community. How could we not expect consequences for that failure? And, frankly, we massively lucked out that the consequences were as minor as they were!

At this point, if Shades chooses to keep Jersey Girl banned, that is, of course, his right as board owner to do so. I don't agree with his decision, but I do respect his position as Board Administrator to make that call. I honestly don't believe that Jersey Girl really wants to post here any longer anyway after everything that has happened.

As far as communicating with Jersey Girl goes, some of you are aware that I own a private website. Jersey Girl is part of my community there. If any of you are interested in participating in that website, please PM me, and I will give you details. It is a NOM website, and my rules are different from Shades. This is not an attempt to take people from MDB. I am still a Moderator and participant on MDB. My site is VERY small, and the board traffic is nowhere near what it is here, nor do I want it to be. I simply know that many of you are friends with Jersey Girl, and will miss connecting with her. This is a way to do that.

Shades--What I really hope we can learn from all of this, is that even though your principle of "everyone is welcome and has a clean slate upon board entry" is admirable, there ARE limits which need to be taken into consideration when basic safety of the community hangs in the balance.

[_Alter Idem]

You explained your position in more detail and thank you for that.

However, you said this;

Here's my thought process: I can handle it if the board gets sued. Heck, if I'm guilty of some sort of wrongdoing, I can even handle it if I get sued. But what I simply can't handle is if me and my moderators get sued for something that a completely unrelated third party does. What makes it worse is if a lawsuit can come crashing down on my head due merely to my not being online during an arbitrary 15 minute segment of time.

You see, I am a man of limited means, and I simply cannot afford to have the bread taken out of my children's mouths for something that someone else might do. Nor do I want my moderators subject to the same liability. Sure, people have said that such a lawsuit would be frivolous, but defending oneself from any lawsuit, frivolous or not, requires untold amounts of time and money.

I'm sorry, but I simply can't live with the Sword of Damocles hanging over my neck 24/7. I simply can't risk having the bread taken out of my children's mouths the next time some wing-nut pisses her off 15 minutes prior to my logging in to the board.

If this is true, if you REALLY believed that Jersey Girl or anyone else making a claim like this could ruin you, then I'm not sure why you put yourself and your family at risk by running a message board. If it is such a precarious and dangerous thing and you are truly at the mercy of your posters then you must admit that you set up this 'sword of Damocles' yourself and could remove it if you chose. But, that is your choice and your priority.

I will tell you that I don't believe you are that much of a risk taker--you care more about your financial well being and your family to put them second to a message board, in my opinion. But, your explanation most likely satisfies your friends here and you'll only have to lose a handful of others over this.

[_Drifting]

Yes, there IS evidence of physical confrontations. The police report that Dan filed indicated that Darrick physically threatened several secretaries in the Church Office Building, and then followed up by verbally threatening Dan and his family.

Liz, have you seen the police report that was filed?

[_Yoda]

Yes, there IS evidence of physical confrontations. The police report that Dan filed indicated that Darrick physically threatened several secretaries in the Church Office Building, and then followed up by verbally threatening Dan and his family.

Liz, have you seen the police report that was filed?

I have not physically seen the actual report, but I have received details of what was on it from a reliable source.