You can leave the Church, but...

[_Drifting]

...the Church can't leave you alone.

Of course there are members all over the world who’d like to go undercover and be forgotten. But they have relatives—in this life and the next—who will not have it. And we, as ward members, will not just go away quietly, either. Once you have been baptized, you are on our radar and we will try to serve you and love you as long as we can find you. If you hit hard times, we’ll help you find employment and assist you with food and commodities in the meantime. If you need medical help, we’ll get you to the doctor. If you have a baby, we’ll bring in meals and babysit the other kids. As far as we’re concerned, you are our family and we will minister to you as best we can. Until you take your name off the records by a formal written request, you will have Home Teachers and Visiting Teachers assigned to help you. That’s the program, and it’s one many other faiths envy.

I know there are lonely people who actually do fall through the cracks, people whose needs get overlooked, even when their names and addresses are “on the books.” But this is not the plan; rather it is evidence of members dropping the ball. If you’re LDS, you’re supposed to be cared for and loved, even if you say, “No thanks.” There’s no such thing as a “Do Not Contact” list in this church.

During our Ward Conference I participated with 20 stake and ward leaders as we brainstormed for half an hour about how to get a particular 14 yearold boy to come to our meetings and activities. Parents all over the world would love such sincere attention to be given to their wavering children. It’s the very sort of ministering to individuals that Christ did, realizing the value of every single soul. And most parents hope and pray their children will be given similar consideration if they’re ever at risk.

http://www.ldsmag.com/article/1/11415

[_Stormy Waters]

Of course there are members all over the world who’d like to go undercover and be forgotten. But they have relatives—in this life and the next—who will not have it. And we, as ward members, will not just go away quietly, either. Once you have been baptized, you are on our radar and we will try to serve you and love you as long as we can find you.

I feel like I'm being stalked by a crazy Boyfriend/girlfriend. I will love you as long as I can find you. Showing up at my house uninvited, and giving me things isn't going to make me want you back. It just makes you look creepy and desperate.

If you’re LDS, you’re supposed to be cared for and loved, even if you say, “No thanks.” There’s no such thing as a “Do Not Contact” list in this church.

In other words we won't leave you alone even if you ask us to.

[Guest]

Targeting children without parental permission? Creepy.

Asking sexual questions of minors behind closed doors? Creepy and illegal.

Stalking inactive members? Creepy.

Dropping off letters, cards, food in hopes to entice reactivation? Creepy.

Dropping in uninvited, unannounced and in business suits? Creepy and rude.

Using retired seniors to hunt you down by phone calls, reversed mail, or question forms to family members? Invasive creepy.

Calling on the phone demanding a meeting with a Bishop (that you may never have met)? Creepy and rude.

Crying and showing insincere love toward an inactive they have never met or "We Miss You"? Very creepy.

And we, as ward members, will not just go away quietly, either. Once you have been baptized, you are on our radar and we will try to serve you and love you as long as we can find you.

Creepy Cult is creepy. Mormonism is a creepy ass cult.


Two words: Name Removal.

[_Stormy Waters]

Good hell is this supposed to be satirical? Who the hell could write something like this with a straight face?

[_Stormy Waters]

From the comments.

As the author of this piece, I must remind those who accuse us of being controlling, and of being stalkers that there actually IS a way to end the continuous effort. You simply write a letter requesting that your name be taken off the records of the church and your bishop will respect your wishes. It isn't as if we pursue you in some kind of frenzy, even if you formally request to be removed. But that is the key-- a simple, formal request. Otherwise you're just complaining about the Lord's system of ministering. And isn't it interesting that, when pushed to this point, most will not write that letter. I believe it is because deep in their hearts, they know Joseph Smith was telling the truth, and they don't want to take that final, tragic step.

Basically resign or we will continue to harass you.

[_SteelHead]

Even if you resign they will continue to harass you.

[_just me]

From the comments.

As the author of this piece, I must remind those who accuse us of being controlling, and of being stalkers that there actually IS a way to end the continuous effort. You simply write a letter requesting that your name be taken off the records of the church and your bishop will respect your wishes. It isn't as if we pursue you in some kind of frenzy, even if you formally request to be removed. But that is the key-- a simple, formal request. Otherwise you're just complaining about the Lord's system of ministering. And isn't it interesting that, when pushed to this point, most will not write that letter. I believe it is because deep in their hearts, they know Joseph Smith was telling the truth, and they don't want to take that final, tragic step.

Basically resign or we will continue to harass you.

Resign or you really do believe in the church. Yeah, no one would stay on the records for family reasons.

[_Drifting]

Dear Joni (the author of the article and the comment above), there are a million South Americans who don't class themselves as members anymore but haven't resigned.

So, wouldn't your time be better spent going south of the border to find a Brazilian?

[_Drifting]

From the comments:

Marj Eldard makes this comment
Relentless: It’s How We Roll - Page 2
Monday, 10 September 2012
Thank you, Joni! I have four kids and four grandkids who are each the subject of my prayers daily. Besides my own children, I have two sweet neighbor gals and their families to whom I "relentlessly" minister...it's how I roll too! Thank you again for a wonderful, encouraging article. I'll just continue doing what I do...

[_just me]

From the comments:

Marj Eldard makes this comment
Relentless: It’s How We Roll - Page 2
Monday, 10 September 2012
Thank you, Joni! I have four kids and four grandkids who are each the subject of my prayers daily. Besides my own children, I have two sweet neighbor gals and their families to whom I "relentlessly" minister...it's how I roll too! Thank you again for a wonderful, encouraging article. I'll just continue doing what I do...