Blixa wrote:I can't say more about my own experiences because I'm already alarmed by the fact that someone thinks we're all in agreement that it was the bishop's delivery and not his content "per se" that we disagree about. Ye gods.
It wasn't the delivery that was the problem for me. If sex is just "doing our duty to the party," it sucks indeed, and that's putting it mildly.
"It doesn't seem fair, does it Norm--that I should have so much knowledge when there are people in the world that have to go to bed stupid every night." -- Clifford C. Clavin, USPS
"¡No contaban con mi astucia!" -- El Chapulin Colorado
palerobber wrote:as a young person i was certainly led to believe that sex would act as a kind of celestial glue in my marriage, especially as i'd left the lid screwed down tight until i'd found the right person to bond with.
Obligatory or duty sex will not keep a marriage together.
just me wrote: Obligatory or duty sex will not keep a marriage together.
who said it would?
and who's talking about "obligatory"?
The bishop.
~Those who benefit from the status quo always attribute inequities to the choices of the underdog.~Ann Crittenden ~The Goddess is not separate from the world-She is the world and all things in it.~
just me wrote:"Hey honey, I know you feel like crap and aren't interested in sex with me.
who would ever try to initiate sex when their partner is feeling ill? where did you get that idea from?
just me wrote:Just think of it like taking out the trash. Something that's gotta be done."
"Oh! Of course, darling! Let's go to bed right now!"
"And don't worry. This'll only take a second."
"Oh, good. I was worried you would be in there too long."
that's kind of funny, but it also seems like a pretty strong reaction to my suggestion of accommodation, compromise, and reciprocation in the bedroom. it does go both ways, you know. and yes, sometimes it is nothing more than an itch that needs scratching. so what? we're only human.
Last edited by Guest on Tue Sep 18, 2012 3:58 am, edited 1 time in total.
just me wrote:"Hey honey, I know you feel like crap and aren't interested in sex with me.
who would ever try to initiate sex when their partner is feeling ill? where did you get that idea from?
just me wrote:Just think of it like taking out the trash. Something that's gotta be done."
"Oh! Of course, darling! Let's go to bed right now!"
"And don't worry. This'll only take a second."
"Oh, good. I was worried you would be in there too long."
that's kind of funny, but it also seems like a pretty strong reaction to my suggestion of accommodation, compromise, and reciprocation in the bedroom. it does go both ways, you know. and yes, sometimes it is nothing more than an inch that needs scratching. so what? we're only human.
I was hoping it would be a lil funny.
Yeah, I don't recommend using the "taking out the trash" method on a woman.
~Those who benefit from the status quo always attribute inequities to the choices of the underdog.~Ann Crittenden ~The Goddess is not separate from the world-She is the world and all things in it.~
palerobber wrote:and yes, sometimes it is nothing more than an inch that needs scratching. so what?
My bold.
So sad.
Hey, Morley, go ask your wife if she wants to "take out the trash" and wiggle your eyebrows suggestively when you do!
Blixa, my apologies for being sophomoric!
~Those who benefit from the status quo always attribute inequities to the choices of the underdog.~Ann Crittenden ~The Goddess is not separate from the world-She is the world and all things in it.~
Blixa wrote:Well, Bob covered most of this, but its the whole having someone else inside of your body that makes it a very intimate kind of abuse. And by inside, I mean physically and psychologically since head games are usually involved in guilt and manipulation. So by saying it "sucks" I was making a rhetorical understatement. It is a horrible and humiliating experience.
thanks for responding.
i think my problem is i'm looking at this too much through the lense of my own safe, comfortable, and familiar long term relationship in which it's hard to imagine feeling that much trauma, even if one of us were to slip up and be manipulative in one instance.
