Reading the Church Position Paper to the Youngsters

[Jersey Girl]

RESPONSE TO THE SUPREME COURT DECISION LEGALIZING SAME‐SEX MARRIAGE IN THE UNITED STATES
June 29, 2015

Because of the recent decision of the United States Supreme Court and similar legal proceedings and legislative actions in a number of countries that have given civil recognition to same‐sex marriage relationships, the Council of the First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter‐day Saints restates and reaffirms the doctrinal foundation of Church teachings on....

A lengthy legal/PR statement ensues. Hopefully this will spark the barrister side of the Holy Ghost to issue a restraining order on all that incipient gayness running amok in the young men and women ranks. They will better be able to devise the torment of those whom they view as appearing or sounding gay accordingly.

The reading of this position paper seems a bit unusual, but since the Church has spent over two decades on this issue, maybe this will put the issue at rest. Perhaps it will constitute both the thunder and the silence. It will announce, "Look upon our works Ye mighty and despair... Nothing like us ever was..." as the sands of time slowly eat away at the monument to its own magnificence.

Makes me wonder though what fate will be in store for young Mormons who become legally married to someone of the same sex? Should they resign their membership ahead of time? Maybe the couple could meet with the bishop and he could recommend another Church?

[_moksha]

The problem with bringing the rhetoric of witch hunts to the modern day youngsters of Salem, is that they have been raised in more enlightened times and forcing them to endure that rhetoric might lead them to question the wisdom of burning witches.

[_sock puppet]

The problem with bringing the rhetoric of witch hunts to the modern day youngsters of Salem, is that they have been raised in more enlightened times and forcing them to endure that rhetoric might lead them to question the wisdom of burning witches.

But whom else will they burn if not witches?

[_Sethbag]

The problem with bringing the rhetoric of witch hunts to the modern day youngsters of Salem, is that they have been raised in more enlightened times and forcing them to endure that rhetoric might lead them to question the wisdom of burning witches.

But whom else will they burn if not witches?

Raw witches?

[_mackay11]

Makes me wonder though what fate will be in store for young Mormons who become legally married to someone of the same sex? Should they resign their membership ahead of time? Maybe the couple could meet with the bishop and he could recommend another Church?

Friend of mine recently completed his "turn" as a Bishop in UK. He was of the "liberal" variety. When a gay young adult sought his advice the Bishop told him, in all sincerity: "you'd probably be a lot happier in life if you found a different church to Mormonism."

I was so proud of him :)

[_zeezrom]

"Council of the First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter‐day Saints"

What a mouthful!

[_sock puppet]

The problem with bringing the rhetoric of witch hunts to the modern day youngsters of Salem, is that they have been raised in more enlightened times and forcing them to endure that rhetoric might lead them to question the wisdom of burning witches.

But whom else will they burn if not witches?

Raw witches?

Tempting, very tempting.

[_sock puppet]

"Council of the First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter‐day Saints"

What a mouthful!

Is that just a wordy way of saying 'those of the Big 15 that are still alive'?

[_moksha]

"Council of the First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter‐day Saints"

What a mouthful!

Is that just a wordy way of saying 'those of the Big 15 that are still alive'?

Sounds like it was written by Chief Justice Elder Oaks' law clerk. I imagine there will be some who will return and report later this afternoon as to who dozed off during the reading.

[_I have a question]

"Council of the First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter‐day Saints"

What a mouthful!

Is that just a wordy way of saying 'those of the Big 15 that are still alive'?

No. It's an unwitting way of showing that Monson isn't running the show anymore.